Try 'Thank-you'," Ted said, giving me a hug (with the requirement of pounding me fraternally on the back - the only way that males are allowed to hug one another unless at least one of them has a fatal disease).

Dammit, it's just like a man to put a rich, fattening meal in front of a woman and get offended when she won't eat, then you seem shocked in the bedroom when you're looking at her hips and wondering how she put on ten extra pounds.

Men are so isolated, prisoners of their own wretched selves, that they can be unbelievably sociable.

Sometimes being a brother is even better than being a superhero.

I was certain I told you the king was coming.”

She planted her hands on her hips. “You did not tell me the king was coming.”

“I remember telling you there would be only one more delay until we would marry. That day on the battlements. I remember it distinctly.”

“Aye, you did say that, but you failed to mention that the ‘one thing’ was the king of England.”

“Well, now you know,” he said casually, as if he were speaking of the time of day or the color of the sky and not something as important as a royal visit. “He is coming tomorrow,” he added. “For our wedding.

A man's plumbing is like his mind: simple, very few surprises. You ladies, on the other hand...well, God put a lot of thought in making you.