This is how it has always been with me. Give me something good, I’ll destroy it. Love me, I’ll destroy you. I have never felt deserving of anything in my life.

The quickest path to self-destruction is to push away the people you love.

When I see you, the World stops. It stops and all that exists for me is you and my eyes staring at you. There's nothing else. No noise, no other people, no thoughts or worries, no yesterday, no tomorrow. The World just stops, and it is a beautiful place, and there is only you. Just you, and my eyes staring at you.

When you're gone the World starts again and I don't like it as much. I can live in it, but I don't like it. I just walk around in it and wait to see you again and wait for it to stop again. I love it when it stops. It's the best fucking thing I've ever known or ever felt, the best thing, and that,[Beautiful Girl] is why I stare at you.

You've never been in love?
Not even close.
And no ones ever in love with you?
Men always want to f**k me, but no one has ever loved me.
I don't Believe that.
It's True.
I stare back.
If it makes a difference, I' dont want to f*ck you.
She laughs.
Thanks.
I think you're beautiful, but I wouldn't f*ck you because when we were done, i wouldnt want you to feel f*cked. I would try to make love to you, and I would probably be clumsy and awkward, but when it was over, I would want you to feel loved.
She smiles.
Thank you, James.
I smile.
Thank you,Lilly.

There is emotion in the hug, and there is respect and a form of love. Emotion that comes from honesty, respect that comes from challenge, and the form of love that exists between people whose minds have touched, whose hearts have touched, whose souls have touched. Our minds touched. Our hearts touched. Our souls touched.
We separate.

Falling for someone is like pulling a loose thread. It happens stitch by stitch. You feel whole most of the time even while the seams pop, the knots loosen, everything that holds you together coming undone. It feels incredible, this opening of yourself to the world. Not like the unraveling it is. Only afterward do you glance down at the tangle of string around your feet that used to be a person who was whole and self-contained and realize that love is not a thing that we create. It's an undoing.