The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept

The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

When I got out of high school they retired my jersey, but it was for hygiene and sanitary reasons

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.