The only activity a cynic will find contagious is yawning, that is, with other people, at other people.

In the philosophical dialect, a cynic takes an insult as a compliment since opposition is already his style.

I never feel unsafe except for when the majority is on my side.

There's nothing more contagious than the laughter of young children; it doesn't even have to matter what they're laughing about.

Has anybody ever told you you’re a remarkably cynical person?”
“I like to think of it as learning from experience.

It's nice to be able to do things for other people, isn't it?

That's why it's fun to talk in the third person sometimes.