The difference between men and women is that, if given the choice between saving the life of an infant or catching a fly ball, a woman will automatically choose to save the infant, without even considering if there's a man on base.
Dave Barry
Related If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to... DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to... DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to... DAVE BERRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving infant's life, she will choose to sa... DAVE BARRY Given a choice between life and death, choose life. Given a choice between right and wrong, choose w... MIRA GRANT Given a choice between my life and yours, I will choose mine. Every time. Without hesitation. RAE CARSON Empathy is the new measurement of everything. It doesn't matter what religion you have, what God you... C. JOYBELL C. I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ... KELLY JONES The difference between men and women is this--if you catch a woman butt-naked, she tries to cover th... DEB BAKER The difference between men and women is this—if you catch a woman butt-naked, she tries to cover t... DEB BAKER A man is given the choice between loving women and understanding them NINON DE LENCLOS You must save what you can of your life; you musn't lose it all simply because you've lost a part. HENRY JAMES His life seemed like a deck of cards, and in the midst of all those two’s and three’s someone ha... TEKOA MANNING If you're ever given the choice between happiness and intelligence choose happiness SOURCE UNKNOWN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A GOOD MAN OR WOMAN AND A GREAT MAN OR WOMAN IS GREAT ADVERTISING. DONALD LYNN FROST We begin to fight. The wind and I. Horns locked. Battling each other with elements. LAURA DOCKRILL The world is a beautiful place to be born into if you don't mind happiness not always... LAWRENCE FERLINGHETTI Never give up on you. In order to make a difference you would have to somehow be different. JOHNNIE DENT JR. She wasn't bitter. She was sad, though. But it was a hopeful kind of sad. The kind of sad that just ... STEPHEN CHBOSKY So, I guess we are who we are for alot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them. But even... STEPHEN CHBOSKY I love my mom so much. I don't care if that's corny to say. I think on my next birthday, I'm going t... STEPHEN CHBOSKY We Are All Infinite STEPHEN CHBOSKY (All the grief she had suffered over her lifetime had moulded her face into a mask of eternal sadnes... JEAN SASSON You can't just sit there and put everyone's lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love. You ... STEPHEN CHBOSKY I saw other people there. Old men sitting alone. Young girls with blue eye shadow and awkward jaws. ... STEPHEN CHBOSKY That one moment when you know you are not a sad story. You are ALIVE. STEPHAN CHBOSKY Somos quienes somos por un montón de razones.Quizás nunca conozcamos la mayoría de ellas.Pero aun... STEPHEN CHBOSKY Ambos dijeron que tomara asiento y parecían hablar en serio, así que me senté. STEPHEN CHBOSKY I know these will all be stories some day, and our pictures will become old photographs. We all beco... STEPHEN CHBOSKY So I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybewe'll never know most of them. STEPHEN CHBOSKY So I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them. STEPHEN CHBOSKY There's nothing like the deep breathes after laughing that hard. Nothing in the world like a sore st... STHEPHEN CHBOSKY no more pencils, no more books, no more teachers' dirty looks, when the teacher rings the bell, drop... STEPHEN CHBOSKY I don't know the significance of this, but I find it very interesting. STEPHEN CHBOSKY Maybe it’s sad that these are now memories. And maybe it’s not sad. STEPHEN CHBOSKY Well, you can't know it without something having been sneezed. A.A. MILNE We'll be Friends Forever, won't we, Pooh?' asked Piglet. Even longer,' Pooh answered.” ... A.A. MILNE Some people never take a chance and never know what it's like to live life to the full. CHLOE THURLOW Mother Superior jump the gun... -The Beatles, Happiness is a Warm Gun LAUREN MYRACLE Those who have lost an infant are never, in a way, without an infant. LEIGH HUNT There is no difference between men and women and I tried to prove that even in logic men and women a... JANA TYLOVA All a guy needed was a chance. Somebody was alway controlling who got a chance and who didn't. CHARLES BUKOWSKI I have met so many heartbroken men. It's a catastrophe. Women are easily overcome by the process tha... C. JOYBELL C. The mark of a real man, is a man who can allow himself to fall deeply in love with a woman. But the ... C. JOYBELL C. If you drive a man to choose between death of his body or corruption of his soul, how much are you a... ANNE PERRY Women need to have Men as their Best friend, Because theres a Built-in competition between Women... NASIR KHAN The difference between love and hate is the difference between a choice! SASHA AZEVEDO I am often asked how it is that I am able to value people to such a deep degree. Apparently, I exhib... C. JOYBELL C. If we all took a minute to reflect upon the wrong we do we would be quite surprised or shocked.Inste... GARY F EVANS... Life is not a game. Still, in this life, we choose the games we live to play. J.R. RIM Love is a growing, or full constant light, And his first minute, after noon, is night. JOHN DONNE If a rugby league player, for example, can improve their speed by 0.1sec, it can mean the difference... KENNETH GRAHAM I was very grateful to have heard it again. Because I guess we all forget sometimes. And I think eve... STEPHEN CHBOSKY I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we'll never know most of them. But even if... STEPHEN CHBOSKY The difference between the love of a man and the love of a woman is that a man will always give reas... FULTON J. SHEEN Status quos are made to be broken. RAY A. DAVIS And I must believe that man has the power to know the right, to choose between good and evil and kno... MARION ZIMMER BRADLEY Given a choice between grief and nothing, I'd choose grief. WILLIAM FAULKNER The main difference between men and woman is that men are lunatics and woman are idiots. REBECCA WEST This is a last, last option. If (other) options do not work for them, they do have this option rathe... BRENDA EDWARDS Don't automatically choose the annuity payout many of them offer if you're given a choice. Again, th... KACY GOTT The main difference between men and women is that men are lunatics and women are idiots. REBECCA WEST If I where to choose between atheism or the end of life, I will prefer the end of life NOOR AHMED If a choice is given to us between being mortal and being immortal, you will find no one in the grou... MEHMET MURAT ILDAN I choose bold. I choose action. I choose what's right for the people. I choose to make a differe... BILL RICHARDSON It is true that going out on to the street implies the risk of accidents happening, as they would to... POPE FRANCIS He understood well enough how a man with a choice between pride and responsibility will almost alway... STEPHEN KING Given the choice between being an optimist and a pessimist, I choose to be a realist! Simply put, a ... TRAVIS J HEDRICK In the mythic schema of all relations between men and women, man proposes, and woman is disposed of. ANGELA CARTER In the mythic schema of all relations between men and women, man proposes, and woman is disposed of... ANGELA CARTER You deserve to be with somebody, who knows you're the one, from that very first moment he lays eyes ... C. JOYBELL C. There is a fundamental difference between men and women - women need romance, men need intrigue. SHERRY ARGOV Given the choice between the experience of pain and nothing, I would choose pain. WILLIAM FAULKNER Given the choice between the experience of pain and nothing, I would choose pain WILLIAM FAULKNER A man who chooses between drinking a glass of milk and a glass of a solution of potassium cyanide do... LUDWIG VON MISES Explaining that I'm faced with a choice between being with the love of my life, or saving four lives... ALYSON NOEL Fred Zinnemann, on From Here To Eternity and The Sundowners really brings out of me, in a completely... DEBORAH KERR They need to understand they have to do something post secondary. Work is inevitable. They have to p... DEBORAH KERR Men are just as vain as women, and sometimes even more so. HELENA RUBINSTEIN I was suddenly very aware of the fact it was me standing up in that tunnel with the wind over my fac... STEPHEN CHBOSKY The only perspective is to really be there. STEPHEN CHBOSKY I didn't feel like reading that night, so I went downstairs and watched a half-hour long commercial ... STEPHEN CHBOSKY Why is England manufacturing bigger and better airplanes and bombs and at the same time churning out... ANNE FRANK In a world in which the common rule which binds and regulates what the general masses feel is underm... ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH You're full of contradictions, Ms. Wallace." I looked up at him and arched a brow. "I'm a girl... TAMMARA WEBBER We grown-up people think that we appreciate music, but if we realized the sense that an infant has b... HAZRAT INAYAT KHAN The only way he could have her was to shatter this stubborn faith of hers. In doing so, would he sha... FRANCINE RIVERS When given the choice between being right or being kind, choose kind. - Dr Wayne W. Dyer R.J. PALACIO the room of the spirit is the mind and the seat of the spirit is the heart. What we give room to muc... ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH If you have a choice between certainty and hope, choose certainty every time. SOURCE UNKNOWN The difference between a house and a home is like the difference between a man and a woman-- it migh... LEMONY SNICKET There was no difference between the answers of the men and the uneducated women in the poll. Only ed... AYTEKIN SIR Life is life - whether in a cat, or dog or man. There is no difference there between a cat or a man.... SRI AUROBINDO The scientific method gives us
information by testing and repeating observable things so that we
can... LEWIS N. ROE The real thing that keeps men and women apart, is fear. Women blame men and men blame women, but the... C. JOYBELL C. There is only a little difference between a man & a woman,but that little difference makes a very bi... DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) According to Islamic principles, when a man is accused of heresy, he is given the choice between rep... NAGUIB MAHFOUZ If I provide for this life and turn away from the Lord, I am wise for a moment, but lost forever. FRANCINE RIVERS The only way he could have her was to shatter this stubborn faith of hers. In doing so, would he sha... FRANCINE RIVERS Honestly, if you're given the choice between Armageddon or tea, you don't say 'what kind of tea? NEIL GAIMAN
More Dave Barry
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DAVE BARRY There's nothing wrong with enjoying looking at the surface of the ocean itself, except that when you... DAVE BARRY Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down. DAVE BARRY Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be att... DAVE BARRY I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War. DAVE BARRY Eugene is located in western Oregon, approximately 278 billion miles from anything. DAVE BARRY If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word. DAVE BARRY We journalists... are also extremely impressed with scientists, and we will, frankly, print just abo... DAVE BARRY Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid. DAVE BARRY I now realize that the small hills you see on ski slopes are formed around the bodies of forty-seven... 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DAVE BARRY What, exactly, is the internet? Basically it is a global network exchanging digitized data in such ... DAVE BARRY The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since th... DAVE BARRY While you are destroying your mind watching the worthless, brain-rotting drivel on TV, we on the Int... DAVE BARRY And, of course, you have the commercials where savvy businesspeople Get Ahead by using their MacInto... DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to... DAVE BARRY All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too, provided you use them for b... DAVE BARRY Let's talk about how to fill out your 1984 tax return. Here's an often overlooked accounting techniq... DAVE BARRY The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed... DAVE BARRY Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in Janu... DAVE BARRY The only really good place to buy lumber is at a store where the lumber has already been cut and att... DAVE BARRY Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always... DAVE BARRY What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death. DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless y... DAVE BARRY I think Superman should go on the Larry King show and announce that he would come back to life if pe... DAVE BARRY I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at... DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybo... DAVE BARRY Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions... DAVE BARRY Software is usually accompanied by documentation in the form of big fat scary manuals that nobody ev... DAVE BARRY Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 feet per second, is a c... DAVE BARRY For many years the National Pretend Speed Limit was fifty-five miles per hour (metric equivalent: 37... DAVE BARRY All of us are born with a set of instinctive fears - of falling, of the dark, of lobsters, of fallin... DAVE BARRY Technically, Windows is an "operating system," which means that it supplies your computer with the b... DAVE BARRY Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. (This is also true of relig... DAVE BARRY The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have... DAVE BARRY The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television. DAVE BARRY I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't ca... DAVE BARRY I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software inco... DAVE BARRY Childbirth, as a strictly physical phenomenon, is comparable to driving a United Parcel truck throug... DAVE BARRY If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and f... DAVE BARRY This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as bei... DAVE BARRY More and more products are coming out in fiercely protective packaging designed to prevent consumers... DAVE BARRY USER, n.: The word computer professionals use when they mean 'idiot.' DAVE BARRY UNIVAC: a device, which contained 20,000 vacuum tubes, occupied 1,500 square feet and weighed 40 ton... DAVE BARRY The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of logic or science. Den... DAVE BARRY 'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'. 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DAVE BARRY We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty... DAVE BARRY All good things must come to an end, but all bad things can continue forever. DAVE BARRY We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized the Rolling Stones, who in those days s... DAVE BARRY If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried DAVE BARRY And Ted Koppel comes walking down the aisle. We'd met a few times, so we said hello. DAVE BARRY Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said "CIGARETTES CONTAIN FAT." DAVE BARRY There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary. DAVE BARRY 1996 also saw a huge expansion of the Internet, with many major corporations, afraid of being left b... DAVE BARRY Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on you... DAVE BARRY In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went... DAVE BARRY Sir,” James asked, “what are we going to do?” “We’re going to look for water,” said... DAVE BARRY Seriously? You won’t help me?” “Help yourself get killed? No, I won’t. DAVE BARRY If Black Stache laughed, you laughed. If he snarled, you snarled. If he breathed in your direction, ... DAVE BARRY If Peter was nine, and a new boy came to St. Norbert’s Home for Wayward Boys who said he was ten, ... DAVE BARRY Babies and Other Hazards of Sex: How to Make a Tiny Person in Only 9 Months, with Tools You Probably... DAVE BARRY If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you wo... DAVE BARRY It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This... DAVE BARRY Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religi... DAVE BARRY A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory DAVE BARRY Spiders so large they appear to be wearing the pelts of small mammals. DAVE BARRY I gotta tell you, ... It's pretty crazy when you think about taking whatever's on the other end of t... DAVE BARRY It was by far just a one-girl show. She led every offensive and defensive category for Bishop Kearne... DAVE BARRY one of South Florida's most vital natural resources, a relentlessly sane voice in a howling hurrican... DAVE BARRY drink beer. But that's kind of my goal pretty much wherever I go. DAVE BARRY I'm very pleased that we made the top four. But I feel that we could have had a stronger showing. DAVE BARRY I've been asked to make an announcement, ... There is a non-luxury car in the parking lot. We've bee... DAVE BARRY The term SAT is a set of initials, or autonym, standing for Scholastic Attitude Treaty Organization. DAVE BARRY We've actually gotten better musically over the years, ... But we've come to realize that we will ne... DAVE BARRY Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it. DAVE BARRY Like many members of the uncultured, Cheez-It consuming public, I am not good at grasping modern art... DAVE BARRY I find myself having these conversations where I go...“You know, the guy, in that place. The guy i... DAVE BARRY Some archeologists believe that Stonehenge - the mysterious arrangement of enormous elongated stones... DAVE BARRY Ridley is a tea drinker. DAVE BARRY It's a concept I've often thought of. DAVE BARRY You get people from all walks of life here -- who work in domestic service. DAVE BARRY I believe that's one of the finest action regurgitation scenes in the history of literature, ... I'd... DAVE BARRY We became pretty sensitive about it. We visited Great Ormond Street Hospital when we were in England... DAVE BARRY What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge ham... DAVE BARRY I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems. DAVE BARRY Buying the right computer and getting it to work properly is no more complicated than building a nuc... DAVE BARRY Because of the level of my chess game, I was able - even against a weak opponent, such as my younger... DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ... DAVE BARRY The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby’s grandparents. You feel completely comfortable ent... DAVE BARRY Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast of current events. The ground is a giant d... DAVE BARRY I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules,including:* Both of your socks sh... DAVE BARRY Puns are little 'plays on words' that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look... DAVE BARRY There comes a time in a man's life when he hears the call of the sea. If the man has a brain in his ... DAVE BARRY The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winte... DAVE BARRY