The country he had left thirty years ago had been a realistic place. There were political realities there, then and now, that precluded blind faith, that discouraged one from thinking that everything, always, would work out fairly and equitably. But he had come to believe such things in the United States. Things had worked out. Difficulties had been overcome. He had worked hard and achieved success. The machinery of government functioned.


Dave Eggers

  Email Quote to Friends   Link to Quote   Create Short URL  Publish Text About This Quote   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Quotes For You

Related

We had a president of the United States who had been out of the country but once before he was elect...
TED TURNER
He knew the things that were and the things that would be and the things that had been before.
HOMER
He had been through a good deal in the course of the Great Quest — he had seen beautiful things an...
MICHAEL ENDE
There were things that Pumpkin Head—now not Pumpkin Head anymore—had to do to be a girl. He had ...
AL SARRANTONIO
He knew now, and the knowledge was hard, that his task had never been to undo what he had done, but ...
URSULA K. LE GUIN
There had been a computer he had also built himself on the farthest corner of the room, but he had s...
NATALIE VALDES
There had been times when he knew, somewhere in him, that he would get used to it, whatever it was, ...
NICK HORNBY
He told me he had the same feelings as a freshman. He stuck with it and things worked out for him.
CHAD JACKSON
He was inspired, and yet he wants books!
He had been preaching for thirty years, and yet he wan...
CHARLES HADDON SPURGEON
Speculation was now news. News had been confused with fact. Fact had been replaced by expert opinion...
JOHN M. KELLER
I recognized him then; that is, I finally comprehended what I had known but had never been able to f...
ALEKSANDAR HEMON
He knew he had to go back out there. But he couldn't go back out there and swing at everything. He h...
HAL MCRAE
Tommy had completely forgotten that he was horny. He had always been horny, and had accepted that he...
CHRISTOPHER MOORE
But memories were fragile and not to be trusted. They were a weight that Faolin did not need to carr...
MADELINE CLAIRE FRANKLIN
[The confetti that 30 minutes earlier had exploded from the ceiling in a silvery rain now lay in clu...
ROBERT DUFFY
There were a lot of things he could say. "Son of a bitch!" would have been a good one. Or he could s...
TERRY PRATCHETT
I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES
He always, always sought out those that had issues. Kids in wheelchairs, or things like that, he wou...
BRENT NELSON
He rolled onto his back and tried to remember the dream he had been having. It had been a good one. ...
J.K. ROWLING
He's worked hard. He had to do off-season work and in-season work. Where he's come from, he's come a...
LANCE DOTTIN
He was tired. I could feel he was tiring out. I had worked hard. It had to count for something.
DAVE PISARCIK
I came from nothing and achieved humungous fame and fortune. But I worked hard. I had discipline and...
SUGAR RAY LEONARD
The confidence that Tony had [in] me out there ... he had a lot of guys to choose from,
ABRAHAM NUNEZ
When I first got here, he was talking about games from two years ago and mistakes he had made. He's ...
BRANDON DOMAN
At the beginning, Lincoln was so inexperienced he had reverence for military expertise, not realizin...
DAVID HERBERT DONALD
But he had been in love once, that he knew. Once and only once, and a long time ago. And it had chan...
NICHOLAS SPARKS
I came back from university thinking I knew all about politics and racism, not knowing my dad had be...
JOHNNY VEGAS
No one could ever be for me what [he] had been because he had known me when, and that had kept me aw...
ELIZABETH BERG
Culture and collars had gone together, to him, and he had been deceived into believing that college ...
JACK LONDON
He believed that he must, that he could and would recover the good things, the happy things, the eas...
SAUL BELLOW
He had been hit by Betsy when it came through, and had rebuilt. Now he had a solid house, one of the...
DON HALVORSEN
The available worlds looked pretty grim. They had little to offer him because he had little to offer...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
Ever since he had been a kid, he had wished and waited, and there had been no change except for the ...
JAMES T. FARRELL
It was only years later that he found out that the princess had been having an affair for months bef...
PENNY JUNOR
That night he wrote in his diary, "Challenge a remaining taboo." It was that simple. He had always w...
ROBERT ANTON WILSON
Already he was a very different hobbit from the one that had run out without a pocket-handkerchief f...
J.R.R. TOLKIEN
It had always been Roth; from the moment he swaggered into that d- alley, where I'd been unsuccessfu...
JENNIFER L. ARMENTROUT
Our thoughts had been that he had left and was not in a good place mentally. We know that our son is...
LORNE BOULET SR
The two of us worked together and lived together for 46 years. We shared not just a lifetime, but th...
JEAN CARNAHAN
Now very much against her will, she thought of the way Jace had looked at her then, the blaze of fai...
CASSANDRA CLARE
He felt light, lighter than ever in all his years. He had severed all relationships. It occurred to ...
JOSEPH ROTH
As she had been walking from the ward to that room, she had felt such pure hatred that now she had n...
PAULO COELHO
When kids made a decision for themselves they have a vested interest in showing they were right. Lee...
COKIE ROBERTS
He was about to go home, about to return to the place where he had had a family. It was in Godric’...
J.K. ROWLING
Perhaps this is something that should have been done long ago, ... It is a time to reflect who he wa...
ALAN GOULD
We just worked hard at it, ... They had the car set up on the edge. If something had happened and I ...
DAVID PEARSON
Sometimes, he would go back to sites that had already been excavated and he would use his own method...
TAMMIS GROFT
Sometimes he would go back to sites that had already been excavated and he would use his own methodi...
TAMMIS GROFT
Sometimes he would go back to sites that had already been excavated, and he would use his own method...
TAMMIS GROFT
Had Calhoun been advised by me, he would have been the most popular man in the United States.
DUFF GREEN
One never quite stops believing,' said the Marquis. 'Some doubt remains forever.' Abrenuncio underst...
GABRIEL GARCíA MáRQUEZ
In fairness, Cedric had some injuries and he had some nagging things that slowed him down some that ...
MIKE MARKUSON
I was clinging to all that had been and, in an ideal world, all that we had hoped for. He, he wanted...
FREYA NORTH
Karat had first said that he would react after the full report of the CAG comes out. It is now a few...
RAMESH CHENNITHALA
He went out there and gave it everything he had, but unfortunately he had some kind of bug. I think ...
VINCE TROMBETTI
Things aren't like this," he kept repeating. "It shouldn't be this way." As if he had access to some...
SALMAN RUSHDIE
People always try to separate the good from the bad in Clinton and say that, if he had not done cert...
DAVID MARANISS
That's a play that I've had for years, and we were fortunate to use that tonight, and it worked. The...
JACOB BYLER
But he said to his wife, sitting next to him on the couch in the TV room, that rarely had he seen a ...
MARK WALLACE
They had double the kids that we had out there, but we had seven kids that worked hard on the court ...
MATT CONNOR
There was England. And then there was the United States. If the pacifist betrayers of the West had n...
DAVID HOROWITZ
(Vollmer) had a super night. He wrestled smart, stayed in good position, worked hard, took his point...
JEFF VON HADEN
Perhaps she had received diamonds, Strike thought; she had always said she didn't care for such thin...
ROBERT GALBRAITH
All that he had of her was his memory, where he held every moment, every single moment that she had ...
JULIET MARILLIER
Peter had been feeling lately that perhaps he and Jenny had come to the end of their story,
MAGGIE O'FARRELL
The great fact all the while however had been the incalculability; since he had supposed himself, fr...
HENRY JAMES
He worked on all kinds of things but he always had a light touch to whatever he did, he was never to...
HAROLD SIMMONS
From my experience with Mike, he not only worked very hard on everything he did, he had very high st...
CARL REHERMAN
Before he had come to the town he had known about nothing but death: here he had learnt to live, to ...
ANNE HOLM
Adam, Grant and Tory have worked at ILM for some years. I worked there on one job with Grant and we ...
JAMIE HYNEMAN
When Byrd came out of there, he had written a lot things while he was in the hospital.
BILLY ECKSTINE
There was something in her eyes! Her eyes were expressive and from the first day that they met, they...
AVIJEET DAS
He had had to be father and mother to her, and he had taken to his tasks with determination, seeking...
PAULA BRACKSTON
He had held out shakily, like a tree that had been hacked down to its breaking point. But that kiss ...
SARAH BLAKLEY-CARTWRIGHT
She was a creature of the deep, and there she must return, or perish. Toby understood that, but it h...
JULIET MARILLIER
I asked a man in prison once how he happened to be there and he said he had stolen a pair of shoes. ...
MARY HARRIS JONES
There had always been black people in and out of our house, and from the outset I had been taught th...
CARL BERNSTEIN
He'd been a fool, he saw that now. How could he have thought, even for a minute, that they'd be safe...
T.C. BOYLE
Peter was not with them for the moment, and they felt rather lonely up there by themselves. He could...
J.M. BARRIE
He remembered Tessa weeping in his arms in Paris, and thinking that he had never known the loss she ...
CASSANDRA CLARE
He believed the press was doing its job, but, in the absence of candor from the committee, it had re...
CARL BERNSTEIN, BOB WOODWARD
He had learned some of the things that every man must find out for himself, and he had found out abo...
THOMAS WOLFE
Anthony worked his tail off. He had a great spring, summer and fall. So he's had some success becaus...
DANA ALTMAN
The family said he had a kidney and liver transplant in 2004 and he had been to a doctor Monday. He ...
JASON MARKLE
There's always a bittersweet kind of thing, but I feel like everything had to work out the way i...
BRUNO MARS
He had a great attitude. He worked incredibly hard to do what he had to do to get on with his life.
CLAY COCKE
So many things were testing his faith. There was the Bible, of course, but the Bible was a book, and...
JOSEPH HELLER
He was probably one of the most hard-working, caring people you'd ever meet. He had a great degree o...
BOB MCDONALD
Everything he had ever done that had been better left undone. Every lie he had told — told to hims...
NEIL GAIMAN
He probably had one central hiding place that, for lack of a better term, would be a main camp, but ...
CHARLES STONE
But he had always believed in fighting for the underdog, against the top dog. He had learned it, not...
JAMES JONES
Women liked Strike—she had come to realize that over the months they had worked together. She had ...
ROBERT GALBRAITH
Technically he was out of status, although he had a pending application. If he left on the last day ...
DEBORAH SMITH
Beau had a good game. He is a force in there and has been for three years. He is a hard worker.
MARK PENDLETON
The Boasting Traveler A man who had traveled in foreign lands boasted very much, on returning to his...
AESOP
There were a lot of architecture and structural things that they had to grind out.
JANE MCVEY
Oscar was raised to believe that if he stayed in his room reading about made up worlds it meant he d...
BENJAMIN WOOD
She loved him because he had brought her back to life. She had been like a caterpillar in a cocoon, ...
KEN FOLLETT
He hoped she might make some amends for the many very plain faces he was continually passing in the ...
JANE AUSTEN
He had been given a strong faith through his parents. As an adult, in his teen years and early colle...
DEENA BURNETT

More Dave Eggers

And that's actually the brunt of what we do is, people going straight from their workplace, stra...
DAVE EGGERS
So this is the space during tutoring hours. It's very busy. Same principles: one-on-one attentio...
DAVE EGGERS
You can do and use the skills that you have. The schools need you. The teachers need you. Students a...
DAVE EGGERS
That’s what books do. They are the building blocks, the DNA, if you will, of you. Think of everyth...
DAVE EGGERS
I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and that there would be time to l...
DAVE EGGERS
Books have a unique way of stopping time in a particular moment and saying: Let’s not forget this.
DAVE EGGERS
We have advantages. We have a cushion to fall back on. This is abundance. A luxury of place and time...
DAVE EGGERS
We are not meant to know everything, Mae. Did you ever think that perhaps our minds are delicately c...
DAVE EGGERS
You sit at a desk twelve hours a day and you have nothing to show for it except some numbers that wo...
DAVE EGGERS
It’s not that I’m not social. I’m social enough. But the tools you guys create actually manufa...
DAVE EGGERS
I was trying to make the web more civil. I was trying to make it more elegant. I got rid of anonymit...
DAVE EGGERS
I think newspapers shouldn't try to compete directly with the Web, and should do what they can d...
DAVE EGGERS
We see the beauty within and cannot say no.
DAVE EGGERS
When I was on the bestseller list with the first book, everyone who knows me knows that every week i...
DAVE EGGERS
The key thing is, even if you only have a couple of hours a month, those two hours shoulder-to-shoul...
DAVE EGGERS
He must trust, and he must have faith. And so he builds, because what is building, and rebuilding an...
DAVE EGGERS
Tim O'Brien's book about Vietnam, 'The Things They Carried', has won every award, is...
DAVE EGGERS
I am a bike enthusiast; there's a certain amount of romance to bikes. They're both beautiful...
DAVE EGGERS
It's our theory that everything trickles down from there, ... That if you have high salaries, good c...
DAVE EGGERS
Status in itself is criminal for those with the means to move, and the means to weave communion betw...
DAVE EGGERS
It all sounds good, and it seems to me, if a system would work, this might be the spot. But frankly,...
DAVE EGGERS
I don't think there's a neighborhood where more writers live. There is no neighborhood in the world ...
DAVE EGGERS
People are strange, but more than that, they're good. They're good first, then strange.
DAVE EGGERS
I try to get anybody coming to San Francisco to come to the Mission. Not to misuse the word 'authent...
DAVE EGGERS
They took my mother's stomach out six months ago.
DAVE EGGERS
What can I do for you, my man?
DAVE EGGERS
The kids sit facing the white board and collectively tell a story, ... As they're coming up with the...
DAVE EGGERS
It was just an idea I had, that it could be cool to have a book covered in fake fur.
DAVE EGGERS
There's nothing to be gained from passive observance, the simple documenting of conditions, because,...
DAVE EGGERS
Who's got the Paris Review? ... It's under a new editor.
DAVE EGGERS
The idea of 'Voice of Witness' is to let survivors and witnesses of human-rights abuses tell...
DAVE EGGERS
It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent...
DAVE EGGERS
But while mum and dad were incredibly caring, it was also a very chaotic household where everyone fo...
DAVE EGGERS
I'm interested in the human impact of the giant foot of misplaced government. After all, we enco...
DAVE EGGERS
His lies were so exquisite I almost wept.
DAVE EGGERS
Yes, a dark time passed over this land, but now there is something like light.
DAVE EGGERS
She needs a new journal. The one she has is problematic. To get to the present, she needs to page th...
DAVE EGGERS
There’s less need to slowly acclimate these guys to the tank,” Bailey said. “They’ll be food...
DAVE EGGERS
But while Sasha told us that in America even the most successful men can have but one wife at once--...
DAVE EGGERS
Max had to think about these new developments. He hadn't liked getting hit by a rock--his stomach st...
DAVE EGGERS
It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent.
DAVE EGGERS
Our town was rigid in many ways, in terms of the uniformity of things, the colors of skin, the makes...
DAVE EGGERS
Again the greatest use of a human was to be useful. Not to consume, not to watch, but to do somethin...
DAVE EGGERS
This democracy thing, or Demoxie, whatever it is, good god. Under the guise of having every voice he...
DAVE EGGERS
The raising of a child is the building of a cathedral. You can't cut corners.
DAVE EGGERS
You see pictures of Buddha and he’s sitting, reclining, at peace. The Hindus have their twelve-arm...
DAVE EGGERS
Here though, there are no oppressors. No one's forcing you to do this. You willingly tie yourself to...
DAVE EGGERS
Dear Producers,
Something is radiating deep within me and it must be transmitted or I will imp...
DAVE EGGERS
THE BOUNTY
In her kitchen, she saw many things she would like to eat. On the counter, there was...
DAVE EGGERS
First of all, I know it’s all people like you. And that’s what’s so scary. Individua...
DAVE EGGERS
I'd rather people just borrow the idea and do their own thing in their own community, ... Whenever p...
DAVE EGGERS
[After this interview Eggers is off to a meeting in midtown Manhattan. Then come more appointments a...
DAVE EGGERS
The house is a factory.
DAVE EGGERS
Through the small tall bathroom window the December yard is gray and scratchy, the tree calligraphic...
DAVE EGGERS
Like I don’t know the first thing about how to be simply grateful that I’m alive. Maybe that’s...
DAVE EGGERS
That is when the commitment to change would be put to the test: when the cameras are gone and the re...
DAVE EGGERS
it seemed, had some purpose, even if that purpose was just to ask for something.
DAVE EGGERS
But you know, there's something about the kids finishing their homework in a given day, working ...
DAVE EGGERS
I publish my own books, so there isn't a certain editor I owe the book to at a publishing house.
DAVE EGGERS
McSweeney's as a publishing company is built on a business model that only works when we sell ph...
DAVE EGGERS
I've purposely stayed away from reading much about postmodern theory, and most everything I have...
DAVE EGGERS
My mind, I know, I can prove, hovers on hummingbird wings. It hovers and it churns. And when it's op...
DAVE EGGERS
I have no idea how people function without near-constant internal chaos. I'd lose my mind.
DAVE EGGERS
Still though, I think if you're not self-obsessed, you're probably boring.
DAVE EGGERS
All we really want is for no one to have a boring life, to be impressive, so we can be impressed. ~ ...
DAVE EGGERS
Why do you want to be on The Real World?
-Because I want everyone to witness my youth

DAVE EGGERS
We feel that to reveal embarrassing or private things, we have given someone something, that, like a...
DAVE EGGERS
It seemed the whole world knew this person named Diana, and if the world knew her, the connection be...
DAVE EGGERS
If a boy became sick he walked alone; the others were afraid to catch what he had, and did not want ...
DAVE EGGERS
We thought we were young and that there would be time to love well sometime in the future. This is a...
DAVE EGGERS
This morning there s first a predictable story about Darfur; an expert on African affairs notes that...
DAVE EGGERS
The truth is that I do not like hanging in there. I was born, I believe, to do more. Or perhaps it's...
DAVE EGGERS
It was always difficult to get cattle returned once a marriage was dissolved.
DAVE EGGERS
But without William K, I would have forgotten that I had not been born on this journey. That I had l...
DAVE EGGERS
The issue is complex, but like many matters in Sudan, it is not as complex as Khartoum would want th...
DAVE EGGERS
I often cannot believe the things I do.
DAVE EGGERS
But we're no longer rain, I said, we're no longer seeds. We're men. Now we can stand and decide. Thi...
DAVE EGGERS
I have had friends who I decided were not good friends, were people who brought more trouble than ha...
DAVE EGGERS
In hospitals I feel palpable comfort. I feel the competence, the expertise, so much education and mo...
DAVE EGGERS
Hello Frances, I have just been to health class, and I was wondering how your feminine parts were de...
DAVE EGGERS
Nothing again. No one is listening. No one is waiting to hear the kicking of a man above. It is unex...
DAVE EGGERS
I will tell these stories...because to do anything else would be something less than human. I speak ...
DAVE EGGERS
I lost someone very close to me and afterward I believed I could have saved him had I been a better ...
DAVE EGGERS
I had forgotten that, and so many things. How could I put everything down on paper? It seemed imposs...
DAVE EGGERS
My plans are a jumble for now, but I do know certain things that I will and will not do. [...] I wil...
DAVE EGGERS
I had the sensation that I might always be running like this, that I would always have to run, and t...
DAVE EGGERS
If I ever fall in love again, I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and...
DAVE EGGERS
This boy thinks I am not of his species, that I am some other kind of creature, one that can be crus...
DAVE EGGERS
I cannot count the times I have cursed our lack of urgency. If I ever love again, I will not wait to...
DAVE EGGERS
Every part of my body felt electric. My chest ached and my head throbbed with the great terrible lim...
DAVE EGGERS
Whatever I do, however I find a way to live, I will tell these stories. I have spoken to every perso...
DAVE EGGERS
Humans are divided between those who can still look through the eyes of youth and those who cannot.
DAVE EGGERS
But everyone disappears, no matter who loves them.
DAVE EGGERS
I can remember exactly where I sat when my teacher first read Roald Dahl's 'James and the Gi...
DAVE EGGERS
He was warm, partly because he had on many layers, and partly because boys whoa re part wolf and par...
DAVE EGGERS
Thank you," he says.
"Thank who?"
"I don't know. You?"
"No, not me. Jesus." DAVE EGGERS
There are many Saudi women doctors, and there are many wealthy and powerful and well-educated Saudi ...
DAVE EGGERS
Because I grew up with this naive expectation of people doing right, I get shocked by every little v...
DAVE EGGERS
You have what I can afford to give. You are a panhandler, begging for anything, and I am the man wal...
DAVE EGGERS
Having lost people when they were young, you feel intimately acquainted with mortality, I guess. Tho...
DAVE EGGERS
I've never had WiFi at home. I'm too easily distracted, and YouTube is too tempting.
DAVE EGGERS
I really believe strongly that kids should be spared the runoff of their parents' lives and prob...
DAVE EGGERS
So many of the things I invented I honestly did for fun, out of some perverse game of whether or not...
DAVE EGGERS
I am myself a failed cartoonist, There are a million reasons to ruin things.
DAVE EGGERS
Three-dimensional results are important to me. I did once spend some time just writing, and floating...
DAVE EGGERS
You treat a kid with respect and as an adult you talk to them as if they're smart people. But yo...
DAVE EGGERS
High school teachers who want to get reluctant readers turned around need to give the students some ...
DAVE EGGERS
Existing, period – that is what drives men to irrational acts.
DAVE EGGERS
I am myself a failed cartoonist,
DAVE EGGERS
–Don’t you think the vast majority of the chaos in the world is caused by a relatively small gro...
DAVE EGGERS
You will die, and when you die, you will know a profound lack of it [dignity]. It's never dignified,...
DAVE EGGERS
I like the dark part of the night, after midnight and before four-thirty, when it's hollow, when cei...
DAVE EGGERS
I wondered quickly if I'd give my life so that a dragon could live. If someone offered me that deal,...
DAVE EGGERS
The idea we came up with, well before we left, was something we coined Performance Literature. Excus...
DAVE EGGERS
But the grind has begun. The windows don’t open, and even the availability of near-constant jokes ...
DAVE EGGERS
But criticism, for the most part, comes from the opposite place that book-enjoying should come from....
DAVE EGGERS
I think almost every writer in the world would hope that books would be always talked about with res...
DAVE EGGERS
Every time I get through the work on a book of nonfiction, I say I'll never do it again; it take...
DAVE EGGERS
I grew up north of Chicago, not far from where the Schwinn bicycle plant used to be, and was conscio...
DAVE EGGERS
I went to Saudi Arabia in 2010, and spent most of my time in Jeddah and the King Abdullah Economic C...
DAVE EGGERS
To me any given story has its appropriate form. There might be some story I get involved with that&#...
DAVE EGGERS
Some of these kids just don't plain know how good they are: how smart and how much they have to ...
DAVE EGGERS
People are strange, but more than that, they're good. They're good first, then strange.
DAVE EGGERS
But Saudi Arabia is surprising in a lot of ways. Like any place, or any people, it relentlessly defi...
DAVE EGGERS
I met a lot of great people in Saudi Arabia and I'd like to see them again. And I'd love to ...
DAVE EGGERS
I mean, all this stuff you're involved in, it's all gossip. It's people talking about each other beh...
DAVE EGGERS
One might think that a boy who was out in the snow for so long would get cold, but Max was not. He w...
DAVE EGGERS
How do you know this?
Because I'm always watching people. When I watch people I too look...
DAVE EGGERS
SECRETS ARE LIES
SHARING IS CARING
PRIVACY IS THEFT
DAVE EGGERS
If somebody here isn't tolerant and accepting, we haven't met them yet.
DAVID EGGERS
When we moved out of Manhattan - where nobody speaks to anyone else even though they all live close ...
DAVID EGGERS
I do still get shocked every once in a while when I catch my reflection when I'm walking past a ...
DAVE MATTHEWS
Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people 'the cops.' But...
DAVE ATTELL
Everyone has a breaking point, turning point, stress point, the game is permeated with it. The fans ...
DAVE WINFIELD
Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
DAVE BARRY
We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admi...
DAVE BARRY
Instead of sailing off into the sunset, he hopes to sail into the next century.
DAVE ANDERSON
For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
DAVE BARRY
What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another pe...
DAVE BARRY
Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
DAVE BARRY
Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is ...
DAVE BARRY
If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ...
DAVE BARRY
Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to a...
DAVE BARRY
The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
DAVE BARRY
It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY
The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire.
DAVE BARRY
I never excelled at one sport or had a very strong passion for anything other than wrestling and bod...
DAVE BAUTISTA
A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are t...
DAVE ATTELL
As an individual, I think you have to find your own path. I like the simplicity and purity of Hindui...
DAVE DAVIES
I had a few brushes with death, where I nearly chose to go. The final one in 1996 did it for me. I s...
DAVE GAHAN
The important thing to remember is that bugs don't actually talk.
DAVE FOLEY
When people get disillusioned and get insecure and content about the future, they tend to brood abou...
DAVE DAVIES
Jazz isn't dead yet. It's the underpinning of everything in this country. Whether it's a...
DAVE BRUBECK
That's country music for you - bourbon and the Bible.
DAVE HAYWOOD
The Left likes to think of itself as the bulwark of progressive liberal individualism, and yet it se...
DAVE BRAT
Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY
A standard sitcom... is a very standard idea, like these people falling in love and living with each...
DAVE FINKEL
Standing out as a writer today requires more than a bright idea and limpid prose. Authors need to be...
DAVE MORRIS
Empire Square production finishes in about a month's time, so at the moment, right now, I'm ...
DAVE ROWNTREE
It is criminal to put our servicemen and women in harm's way and to put the lives of so many civ...
DAVE MATTHEWS
We don't have enough people going into those fields and there is a high burnout rate in some hea...
DAVE OBEY
Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is th...
DAVE BARRY
If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.
DAVE BARRY
The question is, why are politicians so eager to be president? What is it about the job that makes i...
DAVE BARRY
I go to see some big shows of other bands, and I feel like I'm so bombarded and over-stimulated ...
DAVE GAHAN
I'm tired of high policy talks. I want to focus on nuts and bolts.
DAVE FREUDENTHAL
The thing that will never go away is that connection you make with a band or a song where you're...
DAVE GROHL
I played a homosexual bodyguard in 'The Last Detective,' and that was quite a pleasure to do...
DAVE LEGENO
It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY
The baby boomer surge is forcing society to face decisions about costs - and particularly what is va...
DAVE DEBRONKART
Granted, a long book can be as daunting as a hard one. I nearly reached for 'Game of Thrones'...
DAVE MORRIS
Joy comes from places you least expect it. It's usually the simple things, like watching my son ...
DAVE GAHAN
If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to...
DAVE BARRY
The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or...
DAVE BARRY
The waves of love roll throughout the Universe, and overflow in our hearts..
Everything is ONE!
DAVE ZEBIAN
I like the relaxed way in which the Japanese approach religion. I think of myself as basically a mor...
DAVE BARRY
I'm so alive.

As I stand facing the beauty of the never-ending Pacific Ocean, a late afte...
DAVE PELZER
'Breaking Bad' and 'The Shield' were planned right from the start so that their narr...
DAVE MORRIS
I found there's a fairly blatant racism in America that's already there, and I don't thi...
DAVE MATTHEWS
I want to make hand-held music, undiminished by the need to make everybody in the world listen at on...
DAVE SITEK
We all have to die some day, if we live long enough.
DAVE FARBER
We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless...
DAVE BARRY
The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitutio...
DAVE BARRY
There just isn’t enough cock in this world to be caught suckin’ and be called anything but a slu...
DAVE MATTHES
...you're either gonna spend your life fucking pussy, or taking it to church.
DAVE MATTHES
I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.
DAVE BARRY
Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on.
DAVE BARRY
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know ...
DAVE BARRY
You had me at "We'll make it look like an accident."
DAVE BARRY
Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
DAVE BARRY
I'd take a nerf bullet for you.
DAVE BARRY
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
DAVE BARRY
The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter ...
DAVE BARRY
It was not that Adam ate the apple for the apple's sake, but because it was forbidden. It would have...
DAVE BARRY
I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to r...
DAVE BARRY
Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
DAVE BARRY
I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.
DAVE BARRY
In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is ba...
DAVE BARRY
Wake up naked drinking coffee
Making plans to change the world
While the world is changing...
DAVE MATTHEWS
Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see wi...
DAVE BARRY