Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce.

Government is a health hazard. Governments have killed many more people than cigarettes or unbuckled seat belts ever have.

The good news is that, according to the Obama administration, the rich will pay for everything. The bad news is that, according to the Obama administration, you're rich.

Maybe a nation that consumes as much booze and dope as we do and has our kind of divorce statistics should pipe down about ''character issues.'' Either that or just go ahead and determine the presidency with three-legged races and pie-eating contests. It would make better TV.

Children must be considered in a divorce-considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue.

Term limits aren't enough. We need jail.