Somewhere around the place I've got an unfinished short story about Schrodinger's Dog; it was mostly moaning about all the attention the cat was getting
Terry Pratchett
Related Sir Terry Pratchett - he was knighted in 2009, and on him it looked earned rather than entitled - wr... NICK HARKAWAY The rules only applied to people who couldn’t afford different rules. CAMERON STRACHER Don't belive what others tell you. You belive in what you belive; there is nothing better. LYNDA HERNANDEZ The soul that is within me no man can degrade. FREDERICK DOUGLAS I'm a meathead. I can't help it, man. You've got smart people and you've got dumb people. KEANU REEVES Seek always for the answer within. Be not influenced by those around you, by their thoughts or their... EILEEN CADDY If thou canst walk on water, thou art no better than a straw. If thou canst fly in the air, thou art... ANSARI No more duty can be urged upon those who are entering the great theater of life than simple loyalty ... EDWIN HUBBEL CHAPIN Where talent is a dwarf, self-esteem is a giant. - Conceits and Caprices. J. PETIT-SENN You can say that you dont care what anyone thinks about you, but in the end, its all that really mat... TIFFANY GARLAND Because of what you have done the heavens have become a part of man's world. And as you talk to us f... RICHARD MILHOUS NIXON I have never been contained except I made the prison. MARY EVANS mostly about the trouble I got into around here when I was a kid. BOB WEST I was very unfamiliar with YouTube; I thought it was the place for dog and cat videos. LINDSEY STIRLING I feel like a million dollars don't you? ... Good, Lets go get some. TERRY PRATCHETT And the day came out... the mask was removed... and who was behind it? ... No Face... a pe... DEYTH BANGER The first movie was mostly about George and Julia. This one is mostly about me and Catherine and our... CASEY AFFLECK The first movie was mostly about George and Julia. This one is mostly about me and Catherine and our... CASEY AFFLECK I got so passionate about technology. Hacking to me was like a video game. It was about getting trop... KEVIN MITNICK Hes the smartest dog Ive ever had, PETER GOULD Terry was conscious of all those things and wanted to tell the story as he had read it in the histor... COLIN FARRELL Her story was about getting back on her feet and sticking it out. CANDICE LOMBARDO He had read much of things as they are, and talked with too many people. Well-meaning philosophers h... H.P. LOVECRAFT Of course you know him. Everyone knows a pear-shaped man. GEORGE R.R. MARTIN I wondered how it could be that people could love God and hate one another. JULIE ORRINGER Another year is ending, but something is pending ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH The bulkheads were close together, the ceilings low above their helmets. Not much space in there to ... CHRISTINA ENGELA It shouldn't have mattered, not when Miel and the other girls in his class wore jeans more than they... ANNA-MARIE MCLEMORE My father was always getting excited about something. It's genetically inside me somewhere. NICOLAS CAGE The Scottish sun, shocked by having its usual cloudy underpinnings stripped away, shone feverishly, ... STUART HADDON The Empire's got something worse than whips all right. It's got obedience. Whips in the soul. They o... TERRY PRATCHETT Es gab einige Dinge, die selbst hier zu Einigkeit führten: keine weiteren Grundsatzerklärungen, ke... TERRY PRATCHETT Es gefiel ihm nicht, daß ER zurück und auch noch zornig war. Wenn irgend etwas, das Großbuchstabe... TERRY PRATCHETT Meistens herrschte die betäubende Stille von menschlichen Gehirnen, die sich allmählich in Schmelz... TERRY PRATCHETT Nun, wenn du siehst, wie etwas aus dem Meer kriecht und zu atmen versucht… Sag ihm, es sei die Mü... TERRY PRATCHETT Einige Leute« – der kleine Mann blickte skeptisch auf die vorbeiströmende Basismaterie – »ins... TERRY PRATCHETT Natürlich dauerte es eine Weile, bis alles kompliziert genug wurde, um Gaswolken, Galaxien, Planete... TERRY PRATCHETT Er entschied, noch einmal die Wahrheit zu sagen. Es war eine völlig neue Taktik für ihn, und viell... TERRY PRATCHETT Truhe hatte eine ganz einfache Strategie, um mit Dingen fertig zu werden, die sich zwischen ihr und ... TERRY PRATCHETT Inzwischen hätten sie Bürokratie und Steuern erfinden können, um die Bürger mit wahrem Kummer zu... TERRY PRATCHETT Warum sagst du immer wieder Dingsbums?« wandte sich Rincewind an den Vogel. »Begrenzter Dingsbums�... TERRY PRATCHETT In Begleitung von erlesenen Schmerzen.« Rincewind zögerte. Er war ziemlich sicher, die Bedeutung d... TERRY PRATCHETT I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ... KELLY JONES In truth, I'm not really a cat person. Seamus, the wonder dog, still deeply mourned by all who k... MICHAEL DIRDA What is the Other?" they ask. The Other is the one who taught me whatI should be like, but not ... PAULO COELHO I hate to brag about my dog, but he was an exceptionally good police dog. When he was working, he wa... SGT. DAVID HUNTIMER Paul's one thing was committing to forget about the past, to forge ahead into the future. CRAIG GROESCHEL Well, I was in third place about an hour ago, and now I'm in 20th ... and you're one painting short. BYRON NELSON It was great, probably better than a cat or a dog. HEIDI DANGLER AT LAST, SIR TERRY, WE MUST WALK TOGETHER. Terry took Death's arm and followed him through the ... RHIANNA PRATCHETT What goes around, comes around. For years it was all about us. Now it's all about them. GENE NAKAMURA Her uncle approached me and said I should think about getting Marlene on the team because she was ju... JOAN JOYCE Life can be long or short, it all depends on how you choose to live it. it's like forever, always ch... SARAH DESSEN I aimed at the public's heart, and by accident I hit it in the stomach. UPTON SINCLAIR There were so many people, so much to navigate, and as the distance fluctuated between us his hand k... SARAH DESSEN Forever [is] so many different things. It is always changing... it is twenty minutes, or a hundred y... SARAH DESSEN karma's a bitch, and so am I RACHEL CAINE One of the great things about being an actor is it serves a short attention span, which is something... ALLISON MACK In India, I was living in a little hut, about six feet by seven feet. It had a canvas flap instead o... JOSEPH GOLDSTEIN The truth is, you have about three paragraphs in a short story, three pages in a novel, to capture t... NANCY KRESS Cat got your tongue, or dog got your tail? SEAN CROSBY The Best is somewhere there, just search it! DEYTH BANGER There was still something unfinished around her eyes; she wasn’t done yet. She was a story, not an... SEANAN MCGUIRE It's a fairy tale about the guys who wrote fairy tales, through the eyes of Terry Gilliam, ... This ... MATT DAMON It's a fairy tale about the guys who wrote fairy tales through the eyes of Terry Gilliam, ... This f... MATT DAMON There was a whole story going around about how they found a camera in the ashes and processed the fi... BRUCE THYER It was always about the story rather than the character. JEAN DUJARDIN The thing about me and books is that whichever one I’m reading always reminds me of whatever’s h... LAUREN BARNHOLDT With a good friend it’s not always how long you knew them, but how well you did. JANET GURTLER THE TRUTH ABOUT US If you love her. If you want her to stay. Fight for her. JANET GURTLER THE TRUTH ABOUT US I suppose that I was a kind of consultant for taste. Is it good taste? Or bad taste? I had an attent... JOHN HENCH All I want in life is to pet my dog and cat. After that, all I want to do is post photos of them. Mo... CAZZIE DAVID Criticizing these reporters is like booing at the special olympics. TRIUMPH THE INSULT DOG We are the better story. We should be getting all the attention, but we're not. DAVID GONZALEZ Spione überall, wie?«Er sah sich in dem großen Raum um, und seine Aufmerksamkeit verweilte bei ei... TERRY PRATCHETT The important thing is not to shout at this point, Vimes told himself. Do not…what do they call it... TERRY PRATCHETT Without a past you can't have a future. MICHAEL ENDE Once someone dreams a dream, it can't just drop out of existence. But if the dreamer can't remember ... MICHAEL ENDE After that, all I heard was moaning and screaming, and the shooting stopped. That was it. Enough sai... MICHAEL MONTGOMERY My only way of getting my uncles' attention or aunts' attention or whoever's attention w... BECKY G The naked thing was short-lived. It was only around for about six months because we thought it was s... MARK HOPPUS I'm a die-hard Cubs fan. But I'm happy for the Sox. I know some Cubs fans were moaning about what ha... PETER CETERA People like Terry, who was disabled, and the elderly, are being victimized, brutally victimized. The... BOB SCHINDLER I can't complain about that. At least it was comprehensive and we weren't going away moaning that we... MARK WALKER He was at his brother's house and was just playing with the dog, wrestling around with him. The dog ... BOB GARCIA Somewhere after the All-Star break he started dropping down a little more, especially to the right-h... ALAN TRAMMELL About seven years ago, we got serious about looking at South Carolina. We looked all over -- Lexingt... KATHERINE BROWN Pain has creative power, Let the magic unfold... HENNA SOHAIL We don't know all the truth! We only know all the lies! ANTHONY T.HINCKS The aim of the Times story was to stir people's emotions about the great place we could be in two ye... DAMIAN HUGHES But it was different, somehow, to be reading it here, where the actual events had taken place all th... JENNIFER E. SMITH If Stephen King was a killer, he will be the best killer ever existed, check out his novels, check o... DEYTH BANGER I really got tired of it all. I was angry about the johns. AILEEN WUORNOS I was a hotshot as a junior. When I was 18, I really got into fiddling around. I completely lost int... HOLLIS STACY The thing I realize is, that it's not what you take, it's what you leave. JENNIFER NIVEN The only thing I leave alone is the ceiling, because white contains all the wavelengths of the visib... JENNIFER NIVEN, ALL THE BRIGHT PLACES I don’t need to worry that Finch and I never filmed our wanderings. It’s okay that we didn’t c... JENNIFER NIVEN, ALL THE BRIGHT PLACES The Nest Houses aren’t there. It’s dark by the time I stop in downtown New Harmony, with its bri... JENNIFER NIVEN, ALL THE BRIGHT PLACES Right now, he crosses his arms and frowns at me. “Is it true you almost drowned Roamer... JENNIFER NIVEN, ALL THE BRIGHT PLACES It’s okay to laugh, you know. The earth’s not going to split open. You’re not going to hell. B... JENNIFER NIVEN, ALL THE BRIGHT PLACES
More Terry Pratchett
They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it's not one half so bad as a lot of ignor... TERRY PRATCHETT In all seriousness, people think that it's the ideas that are important. Well, everyone has idea... TERRY PRATCHETT I do not, in fact, use many puns. Certainly there are far fewer than people believe. But I suspect t... TERRY PRATCHETT Open your eyes and then open your eyes again. TERRY PRATCHETT A good plan isn't one where someone wins, it's where nobody thinks they've lost. TERRY PRATCHETT The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.... TERRY PRATCHETT Night poured over the desert. It came suddenly, in purple. In the clear air, the stars drilled down ... TERRY PRATCHETT Chaos is found in greatest abundance wherever order is being sought. It always defeats order, becaus... TERRY PRATCHETT She was already learning that if you ignore the rules people will, half the time, quietly rewrite th... TERRY PRATCHETT The trouble was that he was talking in philosophy but they were listening in gibberish. TERRY PRATCHETT It is a long-cherished tradition among a certain type of military thinker that huge casualties are t... TERRY PRATCHETT I don't want unnecessary violence, sergeant," said Blouse. "Right you are, sir!" said the serge... TERRY PRATCHETT This is Art holding a Mirror up to Life. That’s why everything is exactly the wrong way around. TERRY PRATCHETT I intend, before the endgame looms, to die sitting in a chair in my own garden with a glass of brand... TERRY PRATCHETT The three rules of the Librarians of Time and Space are: 1) Silence; 2) Books must be returned no la... TERRY PRATCHETT They stole from rich merchants and temples and kings. They didn't steal from poor people; this was n... TERRY PRATCHETT William: "I'm sure we can all pull together, sir." Vetinari: "Oh, I do hope not. Pulling togeth... TERRY PRATCHETT The universe, they said, depended for its operation on the balance of four forces which they identif... TERRY PRATCHETT I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?" TERRY PRATCHETT If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's wha... TERRY PRATCHETT The place where the story happened was a world on the back of four elephants perched on the s... TERRY PRATCHETT If you trust in yourself. . .and believe in your dreams. . .and follow your star. . . you'll still g... TERRY PRATCHETT If you stopped tellin' people it's all sorted out after they're dead, they might try sorting it all ... TERRY PRATCHETT The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and tryi... TERRY PRATCHETT Do you think it's possible for an entire nation to be insane? TERRY PRATCHETT Did I do anything last night that suggested I was sane? TERRY PRATCHETT It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever," he said. "Have you thought of goi... TERRY PRATCHETT If complete and utter chaos was lightning, then he'd be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunders... TERRY PRATCHETT In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded. TERRY PRATCHETT Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you. TERRY PRATCHETT Few religions are definite about the size of Heaven, but on the planet Earth the Book of Revelation ... TERRY PRATCHETT It's a terrible thing for a man when his woman gangs up on him wi' a toad TERRY PRATCHETT God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which migh... TERRY PRATCHETT Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it f... TERRY PRATCHETT All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life ... TERRY PRATCHETT Grinning like a necrophiliac in a morgue. TERRY PRATCHETT Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot ... TERRY PRATCHETT HUMAN BEINGS MAKE LIFE SO INTERESTING. DO YOU KNOW, THAT IN A UNIVERSE SO FULL OF WONDERS, THEY HAVE... TERRY PRATCHETT There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach sma... TERRY PRATCHETT The female mind is certainly a devious one, my lord." Vetinari looked at his secretary in surp... TERRY PRATCHETT [And there was the matter of Dick Turpin. It looked like the same car, except that forever afterward... TERRY PRATCHETT Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one. TERRY PRATCHETT Noble dragons don't have friends. The nearest they can get to the idea is an enemy who is still aliv... TERRY PRATCHETT You can't map a sense of humor. Anyway, what is a fantasy map but a space beyond which There Be Drag... TERRY PRATCHETT A European says: I can't understand this, what's wrong with me? An American says: I can't understand... TERRY PRATCHETT Whatever happens, they say afterwards, it must have been fate. People are always a little confused a... TERRY PRATCHETT Witches are naturally nosy,” said Miss Tick, standing up. “Well, I must go. I hope we shall meet... TERRY PRATCHETT I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any th... TERRY PRATCHETT Scientists have calculated that the chances of something so patently absurd actually existing are mi... TERRY PRATCHETT It's still magic even if you know how it's done. TERRY PRATCHETT Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new ... TERRY PRATCHETT If you do not know where you come from, then you don't know where you are, and if you don't know whe... TERRY PRATCHETT Most of the great triumphs and tragedies of history are caused not by people being fundamentally goo... TERRY PRATCHETT There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented w... TERRY PRATCHETT Sometimes the gods have no taste at all. They allow sunrises and sunsets in ridiculous pink and blue... TERRY PRATCHETT I meant, said Ipslore bitterly, what is there in this world that truly makes living worth while? Dea... TERRY PRATCHETT Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages. TERRY PRATCHETT It's not enough to be able to pick up a sword. You have to know which end to poke into the enemy. TERRY PRATCHETT ’I'd have you lot up in front of the University authorities first thing in the morning, if it wasn... TERRY PRATCHETT Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces TERRY PRATCHETT It's lies. It's all lies. Some of them are just prettier than others, that's all. People see what th... TERRY PRATCHETT One of the universal rules of happiness is: always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than... TERRY PRATCHETT It's not worth doing something unless someone, somewhere, would much rather you weren't doing it. TERRY PRATCHETT Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom. TERRY PRATCHETT This book had two authors, and they were both the same person. TERRY PRATCHETT If you don't know when to be a human being, you don't know when to be a witch. TERRY PRATCHETT Knowing things is magical, if other people don't know them. TERRY PRATCHETT Even if it's not your fault, it's your responsibility. TERRY PRATCHETT ...inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened. TERRY PRATCHETT We who think we are about to die will laugh at anything. TERRY PRATCHETT His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools -- the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans --... TERRY PRATCHETT Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving. TERRY PRATCHETT Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time. TERRY PRATCHETT DON'T THINK OF IT AS DYING, said Death. JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH. TERRY PRATCHETT It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Li... TERRY PRATCHETT Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some ... TERRY PRATCHETT Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his lif... TERRY PRATCHETT Racism was not a problem on the Discworld, because—what with trolls and dwarfs and so on—species... TERRY PRATCHETT Something Vimes had learned as a young guard drifted up from memory. If you have to look alon... TERRY PRATCHETT Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the mus... TERRY PRATCHETT Evil begins when you begin to treat people as things. TERRY PRATCHETT To be a star, you must shine your own light, follow your own path, and don't worry about the darknes... TERRY PRATCHETT Famous I don't know about. It's hard to be famous and alive. I just want to play music every day and... TERRY PRATCHETT No, what he didn't like about heroes was that they were usually suicidally gloomy when sober and hom... TERRY PRATCHETT "I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"<... TERRY PRATCHETT Most species do their own evolving, making it up as they go along, which is the way Nature intended.... TERRY PRATCHETT I think when people mean that Discworld books have become darker they really mean the series is grow... TERRY PRATCHETT I must have read every issue of 'Punch' published in the 20th century, and I think in the pr... TERRY PRATCHETT Opera happens because a large number of things amazingly fail to go wrong. TERRY PRATCHETT There was once a caustic comment from someone suggesting I was breeding a new race. Fans from differ... TERRY PRATCHETT It seems that when you have cancer you are a brave battler against the disease, but when you have Al... TERRY PRATCHETT It occurred to me that at one point it was like I had two diseases - one was Alzheimer's, and th... TERRY PRATCHETT By the time you've reached your sixties, you do know that one day you will die, and knowing that... TERRY PRATCHETT It seems sensible to me that we should look to the medical profession, that over the centuries has h... TERRY PRATCHETT Everything starts somewhere, although many physicists disagree. TERRY PRATCHETT You have to have really wide reading habits and pay attention to the news and just everything that... TERRY PRATCHETT The truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head. TERRY PRATCHETT Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. TERRY PRATCHETT You can't trample infidels when you're a tortoise. I mean, all you could do is give them a m... TERRY PRATCHETT I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence o... TERRY PRATCHETT Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil... prayer, fasting, ... TERRY PRATCHETT Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces. TERRY PRATCHETT It's useful to go out of this world and see it from the perspective of another one. TERRY PRATCHETT It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It's... TERRY PRATCHETT It's not worth doing something unless you were doing something that someone, somewere, would muc... TERRY PRATCHETT This isn't life in the fast lane, it's life in the oncoming traffic. TERRY PRATCHETT The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp. TERRY PRATCHETT Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out til too late that he's be... TERRY PRATCHETT Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness. TERRY PRATCHETT Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for th... TERRY PRATCHETT Eight years involved with the nuclear industry have taught me that when nothing can possible go wron... TERRY PRATCHETT If per capita was a problem, decapita could be arranged TERRY PRATCHETT Unseen University was much bigger on the inside. Thousands of years as the leading establishment of ... TERRY PRATCHETT Any true wizard, faced with a sign like 'Do not open this door. Really. We mean it. We're not kiddin... TERRY PRATCHETT Genius is always allowed some leeway, once the hammer has been pried from its hands and the blood ha... TERRY PRATCHETT Siren voices tell me, 'You don't have to keep going on.' And then you think, 'I'... TERRY PRATCHETT We're living in science fiction, but we don't realize it. TERRY PRATCHETT She got on with her education. In her opinion, school kept on trying to interfere with it. TERRY PRATCHETT Albert grunted. "Do you know what happens to lads who ask too many questions?" Mort thought for... TERRY PRATCHETT He's bound to have done something ,” Nobby repeated. In this he was echoing the P... TERRY PRATCHETT Sometimes the crime follows the punishment, which only serves to prove the foresight of the Great Go... TERRY PRATCHETT 'Educational' refers to the process, not the object. Although, come to think of it, some of ... TERRY PRATCHETT Joy is to fun what the deep sea is to a puddle. It’s a feeling inside that can hardly be contained... TERRY PRATCHETT No more words. We know them all, all the words that should not be said. But you have made my world m... TERRY PRATCHETT And what would humans be without love?" RARE, said Death. TERRY PRATCHETT That's why it's always worth having a few philosophers around the place. One minute it's all is trut... TERRY PRATCHETT Twoflower was a tourist, the first ever seen on the discworld. Tourist, Rincewind had decided, meant... TERRY PRATCHETT Everything starts somewhere, though many physicists disagree. But people have always been dimly awar... TERRY PRATCHETT The living often don’t appreciate how complicated the world looks when you are dead, because while... TERRY PRATCHETT Hello, inner child, I'm the inner babysitter! TERRY PRATCHETT I like writing. I get cranky when I can't. Yes, I write books back to back, and I work very hard... TERRY PRATCHETT The baby boomers are getting older, and will stay older for longer. And they will run right into the... TERRY PRATCHETT We have been so successful in the past century at the art of living longer and staying alive that we... TERRY PRATCHETT I regarded finding I had a form of Alzheimer's as an insult and decided to do my best to marshal... TERRY PRATCHETT The bravest person I've ever met was a young boy going through massive amounts of treatment for ... TERRY PRATCHETT Evolution was far more thrilling to me than the biblical account. Who would not rather be a rising a... TERRY PRATCHETT My advice is this. For Christ's sake, don't write a book that is suitable for a kid of 12 ye... TERRY PRATCHETT You can't build a plot out of jokes. You need tragic relief. And you need to let people know tha... TERRY PRATCHETT He was the sort of person who stood on mountaintops during thunderstorms in wet copper armour shouti... TERRY PRATCHETT Christ managed to boil down an awful lot of commandments to a few very simple rules for living. It... TERRY PRATCHETT My experience in Amsterdam is that cyclists ride where the hell they like and aim in a state of rage... TERRY PRATCHETT And sin, young man, is when you treat people like things. TERRY PRATCHETT Everybody has somebody. It could be a friend, a lover, a spouse, a writing partner, or even That One... TERRY PRATCHETT I believe you find life such a problem because you think there are good people and bad people. You'r... TERRY PRATCHETT But what's worth more than gold?" "Practically everything. You, for example. Gold is heav... TERRY PRATCHETT Gnomes live ten times faster than humans. They're harder to see than a high-speed mouse. That's on... TERRY PRATCHETT She walked quickly through the darkness with the frank stride of someone who was at least certain th... TERRY PRATCHETT My experience in Amsterdam is that cyclists ride where the hell they like and aim in a state of rage... TERRY PRATCHETT There was this about vampires : they could never look scruffy. Instead, they were... what was the wo... TERRY PRATCHETT Steal five dollars and you're a common thief. Steal thousands and you're either the government or a ... TERRY PRATCHETT Of course I'm sane, when trees start talking to me, I don't talk back. TERRY PRATCHETT The trouble is you can shut your eyes but you can’t shut your mind. TERRY PRATCHETT Nanny Ogg looked under her bed in case there was a man there. Well, you never knew your luck. TERRY PRATCHETT Ginger: You know what the greatest tragedy is in the whole world?... It's all the people who never f... TERRY PRATCHETT There's a door." "Where does it go?" "It stays where it is, I think. TERRY PRATCHETT Many people could say things in a cutting way, Nanny knew. But Granny Weatherwax could listen ... TERRY PRATCHETT No one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away... TERRY PRATCHETT The enemy isn't men, or women, it's bloody stupid people and no one has the right to be stupid. TERRY PRATCHETT In fact, the mere act of opening the box will determine the state of the cat, although in this ... TERRY PRATCHETT The entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) run away from... TERRY PRATCHETT Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder. Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels. Elves ... TERRY PRATCHETT The presence of those seeking the truth is infinitely to be preferred to the presence of those who t... TERRY PRATCHETT I got quite annoyed after the Haiti earthquake. A baby was taken from the wreckage and people said i... TERRY PRATCHETT In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this. TERRY PRATCHETT No one's policing their own minds more than an author. You spend a lot of time in your own head ... TERRY PRATCHETT Blessings be on this house," Granny said, perfunctorily. It was always a good opening remark for a w... TERRY PRATCHETT At such times the universe gets a little closer to us. They are strange times, times of beginnings a... TERRY PRATCHETT Just erotic. Nothing kinky. It's the difference between using a feather and using a chicken. TERRY PRATCHETT I saved a man's life once," said Granny. "Special medicine, twice a day. Boiled water with a bit of ... TERRY PRATCHETT The Monks of Cool, whose tiny and exclusive monastery is hidden in a really cool and laid-back valle... TERRY PRATCHETT She had heard it said that, before you could understand anybody, you needed to walk a mile in their ... TERRY PRATCHETT His progress through life was hampered by his tremendous sense of his own ignorance, a disability wh... TERRY PRATCHETT Just because someone's a member of an ethnic minority doesn't mean they're not a nasty small-minded ... TERRY PRATCHETT Maurice watched them argue again. Humans, eh? Think they're lords of creation. Not like us cats. We ... TERRY PRATCHETT The only superstition I have is that I must start a new book on the same day that I finish the last ... TERRY PRATCHETT Dickens, as you know, never got round to starting his home page. TERRY PRATCHETT Nothing I can say or devise, and nothing anybody else can say or devise, is going to be perfect. TERRY PRATCHETT The whole of life is just like watching a film. Only it's as though you always get in ten minutes af... TERRY PRATCHETT Seven hundred thousand people who have dementia in this country are not heard. I'm fortunate; I ... TERRY PRATCHETT It was one of those problematic occasions with long silences, sporadic coughs, and people saying iso... TERRY PRATCHETT Personally, I think the best motto for an educational establishment is: 'Or Would You Rather Be ... TERRY PRATCHETT Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels.Elves are fantasti... TERRY PRATCHETT Rincewind had been told that death was just like going into another room. The difference is, when yo... TERRY PRATCHETT The point is that descriptive writing is very rarely entirely accurate and during the reign of Olaf ... TERRY PRATCHETT Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder. Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels. Elves ar... TERRY PRATCHETT "Why does everyone run toward a blood curdling scream?" mumbled the Senior Wrangler. "It is contrary... TERRY PRATCHETT A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores. TERRY PRATCHETT Sham Harga had run a succesful eatery for many years by always smiling, never extending credit, and ... TERRY PRATCHETT It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If ... TERRY PRATCHETT It could not be happening because this sort of thing did not happen. Any contradictory evidence coul... TERRY PRATCHETT An education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs ... TERRY PRATCHETT A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read. TERRY PRATCHETT Stupid men are often capable of things the clever would not dare to contemplate... TERRY PRATCHETT The consensus seemed to be that if really large numbers of men were sent to storm the mountain, then... TERRY PRATCHETT For animals, the entire universe has been neatly divided into things to (a) mate with, (b) eat, (c) ... TERRY PRATCHETT Give a man a fire and he's warm for the day. But set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his l... TERRY PRATCHETT In the begining there was nothing, and it exploded. TERRY PRATCHETT Gravity is a habit that is hard to shake off. TERRY PRATCHETT The truth may be out there, but the lies are inside your head. TERRY PRATCHETT God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of his own devising, which migh... TERRY PRATCHETT