FastSaying

Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is lethal enough.


Dave Barry

  Email Quote to Friends   Link to Quote   Create Short URL  Publish Text About This Quote   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Quotes For You

Related

The trend now is that people are going for that type activity, the adrenaline of the upper-level ski...
EARL SALINE Life is weird and wonderful like that, is it not.
SONYA.E.WILLIAMS What Fucks me... is that we both are the same... we all walk on the same path... but everything is a...
DEYTH BANGER Life is an audition.
THOMAS FLAJNIK - ANTICHIMERAPODAL Our life is a series of moments. Let them all go. Moments. All gathering towards this one.
NOW IS GOOD When living is too sweet and swanky, it may be very hard to appreciate the simplest things in life. ...
ERIK PEVERNAGIE Surfing, like snowboarding is becoming more mainstream. It's really getting much more popular as peo...
BRUCE CONDON If the best is possible, than good is never enough and only do the best.
ROBERT SIAHAAN I believe that there is a Matrix and... to be more accurate I am in the Pornography Matrix.
DEYTH BANGER Godliness with contentment is rare.
CRAIG GROESCHEL If he is a God of sound judgment, that sound mind must be revealed in people who identify themselves...
SUNDAY ADELAJA He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.
LAO TZU Seeing, touching is believing!
THOMAS FLAJNIK - ANTICHIMERAPODAL SEO is DEAD in the eyes of the people who know LESS about it.
J. ORACOY I let out a sound that was definitely not a whimper. It was something far more manly, no matter what...
BRANDON SANDERSON Be a good guide, tell me what you see, are sure is that?
Please try to describe the picture as ...
DEYTH BANGER We all want to trust someone ,but we all think that what we see is real and the truth but if we trul...
GARY F EVANS... Money is not everything.
BEN OAK The greatest thing in life is finding someone who knows all about you and your mistakes, and still s...
DHARM BABU You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside your eardrums unb...
WHY YAWNING IS CONTAGIOUS Be original, be yourself, be you.
ELISE R MAUDE IS This is very popular for the little ones who aren't big enough to do other things. It's darling.
KAREN LAFLAMME Skiing and snowboarding are sports of freedom.
GERALDINE LINK Dave Barry Turns 50
DAVE BARRY Snowboarding is an expensive sport. Any help you can get with that is useful.
HAYDEN TURNER Today A woman is one who tries to bring a man down. A man is one who has to keep that woman in check...
APURVA GAGLANI Sooner or later, what you do will speak
SOTONYE ANGA I needed to say something. Something romantic! Something to sweep her off her feet.
"You're lik...
BRANDON SANDERSON I'm not really good at skiing or snowboarding, or swimming, per se.
THEOPHILUS LONDON The world that we live in is a weakness. To continuously live in an environment that weakens you, on...
APURVA GAGLANI There are not many places in the world where you can get to the beach in an hour, the desert in two ...
ALEX PETTYFER You can work with the little that you know and have
SOTONYE ANGA We feel that, in Mozart's birthday year, the series is going to be popular enough to justify that.
NANCY LATURNO BOJANIC Ques eso? Queso?
NOLAN J. VANDER HAAGEN if you love someone,you did not think if it was right...all you know was you love the person so much...
VERONICA LAPPAY Life is what it is supposed to be, its just not always what you want it to be...
DANIEL GILMAN God is not pleased with these mashed potato Christians. You know the kind that are found in the T.V....
LAMAR THOMPSON Honesty is very sexy.
VALERIE BERTINELLI Working Americans who believe in our country and who believe in our Constitution are saying, 'En...
JOHN BOEHNER Just imagine, among 8.7 million species, only one has become smart enough to ponder over the meaning...
ABHIJIT NASKAR Success is not in what you have, but who you are.
BO BENNETT Integrity is not everything, but it is the only thing that matters.
JEFFREY FRY Enough is enough. Enough of the waste. Enough of the spending. Enough of the debt. Enough of the arr...
DAN BENISHEK We use snowboarding as a vehicle for building self confidence, not an end; so you can feel that, if ...
JASON HIRSCH It is what it is, it is what you make it.
JAMES DURBIN Then the face of Big Brother faded away again and instead the three slogans of the Party stood out i...
GEORGE ORWELL One of the big things I've learned is that there's an advantage to regular low-intensity act...
DAN BUETTNER One of the benefits of aligning yourself with an indistinct cluster of people is that claiming to fe...
CHARLIE BROOKER This is a very lethal, and unfortunately, adaptive enemy that we are faced with inside Iraq,
CARTER HAM Being present is being connected to All Things.
S. KELLEY HARRELL, M. DIV. Eavesdropping is such a regular-person activity.
FRANNY BILLINGSLEY 23. With God, even when nothing is happening...something is happening.
JAMES C. DOBSON She buys "mixed salad greens" for seven dollars a bag, triple-washed with who knows what. And to get...
RUDOLPH DELSON Jon is an amazing front man. Every night I walk on stage with him and I just go: "Wow, this guy is j...
RICHIE SAMBORA There comes a point in every man's life when he has to say: 'Enough is enough.'
LANCE ARMSTRONG Poems seem to have a life of their own. They tell you when enough is enough.
THOMAS LYNCH There's only so far you can go before you say enough is enough.
JENNIFER GRANHOLM Life is not a game. Still, in this life, we choose the games we live to play.
J.R. RIM There is an apparent need to save the earth and the means God chose to do this is not by sending POW...
SUNDAY ADELAJA We can play now… just do that and that little piece of kinky thoughts… few perverts add and you ...
DEYTH BANGER Your latest news is just news being repeated over and over again. It's old news already.
ANDONI GARCIA Szerzetesek, vannak tanulatlan, közönséges emberek, akik nem gondolnak a nemes dolgokkal, nem hal...
GAUTAMA BUDDHA És Brahmá, a Teremtő, felső ruháját fél vállán átvetve, összetett kézzel meghajolt a Mag...
GAUTAMA BUDDHA I do not say that one who is vegetarian is full of compassion and one who is not, is otherwise. We s...
MORARJI DESAI Your heart just breaks, that's all. But you can't judge or point fingers. You just have to be lucky ...
AUDREY HEPBURN Anything that involves the outdoors I'm all about, whether it be skiing, snowboarding, wakesurfi...
DANIEL CUDMORE Hell is other people.
JEAN-PAUL SARTRE The penalty of success is to be bored by the attentions of people who formerly snubbed you.
MARY WILSON LITTLE Search Engine Optimization (SEO) is like a car, that if you don't fill it with gas it will take you ...
J. ORACOY Greatness is achieving something unimaginable and doing that feat with ease
LEE S COATES Hazing is an extraordinary activity that, when it occurs often enough, becomes perversely ordinary a...
HANK NUWER To stand on the
brink of what is coming, feeling eager, optimistic anticipation—with no feeli...
ASK AND IT IS GIVEN Isn't that how B movies became popular? ... They would do things that regular cinema didn't.
EDWARD SEYMOUR I think the majority of the people do not feel that this is an appropriate spot.
DAVID BLACK The experience of being on a show that is very much in the center of popular culture is exciting. Yo...
AASIF MANDVI Cooking is like snow skiing: If you don't fall at least 10 times, then you're not skiing har...
GUY FIERI If time is money and perhaps rightly said so, then with that count a person who does nothing for his...
ANUJ SOMANY Be always excited about being alive,because life is good.
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) Life may not be party you hoped for,But that doesnt mean u should stop dancing!Remember you are the ...
ANMOL P. JAORA I am Happy and satisfied with what I am. 10000 will take me wrong, 1000 will go against me, 100 will...
NEHA KOTHARI Your life is expensive to those who loves you, so take care of your life.
NEHA KOTHARI Why is love so expensive even when it exists everywhere?
NEHA KOTHARI «Sarò nel programma di protezione testimoni,» disse Jack.
«Avrò un nome diverso, non so d...
JANE SEVILLE When push comes to shove would people do what they felt was right, to get justice done or would they...
GARY F EVANS... There is no time...but the present.
KENT POLLON You have taken the step to cross the road, cross it. One step back can bring you an accident.
NEHA KOTHARI Knowledge is not vast collection of academic degrees but right empowerment of open mind with an enli...
ANUJ SOMANY God Is Great. If these three words together enshrine in our mind, heart and soul, then there is neve...
ANUJ SOMANY Debt is simply selling a future to buy a present.
ANONYMUS If our mind was an ocean then every now and then we would have the perfect storm happening in it.Gar...
GARY F EVANS... Talk is cheap, until you hire a lawyer.
UNKNOWN Even war can be silent
TANICA S HALL It is better to be kept in the dark and continue on your merry way, than to be told a lie and to be ...
IRENEE HOUNGBLAME Einmal hat ihm einer im Schlaf die Schuhe ausgezogen, reingeschissen und wieder angezogen. Um diese ...
HEINZ STRUNK If you only think outside the box,you will always wonder what's inside. Keep your options open. Lore...
LORENZO VICTORY Grey is… such a mean word. I don’t remember a time when I thought grey was anything but… pain....
DEE JUUSAN Riprendo a correre, a tutta velocità. Non ho più paura di nulla. Non ho più paura di nessuno. Non...
MAKOTO SHINKAI Love is too weak a word for what I feel. I luuurve you, you know, I loave you, I luff you, two F’s...
~RAM CHANDER(RC) Le etichette possono essere riduttive. A volte bisogna smettere di pensare a genere e orientamento e...
JAY NORTHCOTE But I do not do these things because we are a family. I do them because they are common decencies. T...
JOHNATHAN SAFRAN FOER

More Dave Barry

Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
DAVE BARRY We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admi...
DAVE BARRY For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
DAVE BARRY What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another pe...
DAVE BARRY Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ...
DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to a...
DAVE BARRY The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
DAVE BARRY It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire.
DAVE BARRY Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is th...
DAVE BARRY If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.
DAVE BARRY The question is, why are politicians so eager to be president? What is it about the job that makes i...
DAVE BARRY It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to...
DAVE BARRY The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or...
DAVE BARRY I like the relaxed way in which the Japanese approach religion. I think of myself as basically a mor...
DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless...
DAVE BARRY The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitutio...
DAVE BARRY I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.
DAVE BARRY Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on.
DAVE BARRY It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know ...
DAVE BARRY You had me at "We'll make it look like an accident."
DAVE BARRY Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
DAVE BARRY I'd take a nerf bullet for you.
DAVE BARRY What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
DAVE BARRY The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter ...
DAVE BARRY It was not that Adam ate the apple for the apple's sake, but because it was forbidden. It would have...
DAVE BARRY I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to r...
DAVE BARRY Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
DAVE BARRY I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.
DAVE BARRY In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is ba...
DAVE BARRY Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see wi...
DAVE BARRY My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I threw my amplifier out the dormit...
DAVE BARRY Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would b...
DAVE BARRY What Women Want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be...
DAVE BARRY Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popula...
DAVE BARRY Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated ...
DAVE BARRY Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told.
DAVE BARRY There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who ...
DAVE BARRY The obvious and fair solution to the housework problem is to let men do the housework for, say, the ...
DAVE BARRY It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in...
DAVE BARRY In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went...
DAVE BARRY Although Golf was originally restricted to wealthy Protestants, today its open to anybody who owns h...
DAVE BARRY I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any ...
DAVE BARRY The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.
DAVE BARRY A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer
DAVE BARRY It is a good idea to "shop around" before you settle on a doctor. Ask about the condition of his Mer...
DAVE BARRY Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the p...
DAVE BARRY The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they...
DAVE BARRY My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible.
DAVE BARRY The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning "ability to," and bics, meaning "withst...
DAVE BARRY Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris...
DAVE BARRY The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.
DAVE BARRY The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas...
DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless y...
DAVE BARRY Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that h...
DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving infant's life, she will choose to sa...
DAVE BARRY And computers are getting smarter all the time: scientists tell us that soon they will be able to ta...
DAVE BARRY The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious pe...
DAVE BARRY Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.
DAVE BARRY New York Taxi Rules:1. Driver speaks no English.2. Driver just got here two days ago from someplace ...
DAVE BARRY Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organiza...
DAVE BARRY Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won...
DAVE BARRY Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
DAVE BARRY Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.
DAVE BARRY I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are our Hope for the Futu...
DAVE BARRY One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a compute...
DAVE BARRY People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with th...
DAVE BARRY Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see wit...
DAVE BARRY We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but ...
DAVE BARRY Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, usi...
DAVE BARRY We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this i...
DAVE BARRY Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris...
DAVE BARRY To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.
DAVE BARRY American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, includi...
DAVE BARRY Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television witho...
DAVE BARRY Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.
DAVE BARRY Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who re...
DAVE BARRY You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.
DAVE BARRY Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by...
DAVE BARRY Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.
DAVE BARRY Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his ...
DAVE BARRY The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.
DAVE BARRY Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
DAVE BARRY I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a goo...
DAVE BARRY Palestinian and Israeli leaders finally recover the Road Map to Peace, only to discover that, while ...
DAVE BARRY I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news p...
DAVE BARRY There's nothing wrong with enjoying looking at the surface of the ocean itself, except that when you...
DAVE BARRY Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.
DAVE BARRY Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be att...
DAVE BARRY I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War.
DAVE BARRY Eugene is located in western Oregon, approximately 278 billion miles from anything.
DAVE BARRY If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.
DAVE BARRY We journalists... are also extremely impressed with scientists, and we will, frankly, print just abo...
DAVE BARRY Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.
DAVE BARRY I now realize that the small hills you see on ski slopes are formed around the bodies of forty-seven...
DAVE BARRY Your hand and your mouth agreed many years ago that, as far as chocolate is concerned, there is no n...
DAVE BARRY If you asked me to name the three scariest threats facing the human race, I would give the same answ...
DAVE BARRY A Mission Statement is a dense slab of words that a large organization produces when it needs to est...
DAVE BARRY As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.
DAVE BARRY The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background...
DAVE BARRY If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - yo...
DAVE BARRY Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is read...
DAVE BARRY Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, D...
DAVE BARRY Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the...
DAVE BARRY What, exactly, is the internet? Basically it is a global network exchanging digitized data in such ...
DAVE BARRY The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since th...
DAVE BARRY While you are destroying your mind watching the worthless, brain-rotting drivel on TV, we on the Int...
DAVE BARRY And, of course, you have the commercials where savvy businesspeople Get Ahead by using their MacInto...
DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to...
DAVE BARRY All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too, provided you use them for b...
DAVE BARRY Let's talk about how to fill out your 1984 tax return. Here's an often overlooked accounting techniq...
DAVE BARRY The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed...
DAVE BARRY Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in Janu...
DAVE BARRY The only really good place to buy lumber is at a store where the lumber has already been cut and att...
DAVE BARRY Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always...
DAVE BARRY What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.
DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless y...
DAVE BARRY I think Superman should go on the Larry King show and announce that he would come back to life if pe...
DAVE BARRY I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at...
DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybo...
DAVE BARRY Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions...
DAVE BARRY Software is usually accompanied by documentation in the form of big fat scary manuals that nobody ev...
DAVE BARRY Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 feet per second, is a c...
DAVE BARRY For many years the National Pretend Speed Limit was fifty-five miles per hour (metric equivalent: 37...
DAVE BARRY All of us are born with a set of instinctive fears - of falling, of the dark, of lobsters, of fallin...
DAVE BARRY Technically, Windows is an "operating system," which means that it supplies your computer with the b...
DAVE BARRY Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. (This is also true of relig...
DAVE BARRY The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have...
DAVE BARRY The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.
DAVE BARRY I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't ca...
DAVE BARRY I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software inco...
DAVE BARRY Childbirth, as a strictly physical phenomenon, is comparable to driving a United Parcel truck throug...
DAVE BARRY If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and f...
DAVE BARRY This is true; virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as bei...
DAVE BARRY More and more products are coming out in fiercely protective packaging designed to prevent consumers...
DAVE BARRY USER, n.: The word computer professionals use when they mean 'idiot.'
DAVE BARRY UNIVAC: a device, which contained 20,000 vacuum tubes, occupied 1,500 square feet and weighed 40 ton...
DAVE BARRY The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of logic or science. Den...
DAVE BARRY 'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
DAVE BARRY ''Varlet and the Squeaking Codpieces'' would be an excellent name for a rock band.
DAVE BARRY Grammatically, should of is a predatory admonition; as such, it is always used as part of a herpetol...
DAVE BARRY It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This...
DAVE BARRY I hate rap music, which to me sounds like a bunch of angry men shouting, possibly because the person...
DAVE BARRY The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning "ability to," and bics, meaning "withsta...
DAVE BARRY Both of your socks should always be the same color, Or they should at least both be fairly dark
DAVE BARRY What, exactly, is the internet? Basically it is a global network exchanging digitized data in such a...
DAVE BARRY When Thomas Paine showed Benjamin Franklin the manuscript of The Age of Reason, Franklin advised him...
DAVE BARRY We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty...
DAVE BARRY All good things must come to an end, but all bad things can continue forever.
DAVE BARRY We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized the Rolling Stones, who in those days s...
DAVE BARRY If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
DAVE BARRY And Ted Koppel comes walking down the aisle. We'd met a few times, so we said hello.
DAVE BARRY Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said "CIGARETTES CONTAIN FAT."
DAVE BARRY There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary.
DAVE BARRY 1996 also saw a huge expansion of the Internet, with many major corporations, afraid of being left b...
DAVE BARRY Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on you...
DAVE BARRY In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went...
DAVE BARRY Sir,” James asked, “what are we going to do?”
“We’re going to look for water,” said...
DAVE BARRY Seriously? You won’t help me?”
“Help yourself get killed? No, I won’t.
DAVE BARRY If Black Stache laughed, you laughed. If he snarled, you snarled. If he breathed in your direction, ...
DAVE BARRY If Peter was nine, and a new boy came to St. Norbert’s Home for Wayward Boys who said he was ten, ...
DAVE BARRY Babies and Other Hazards of Sex: How to Make a Tiny Person in Only 9 Months, with Tools You Probably...
DAVE BARRY If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you wo...
DAVE BARRY It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This...
DAVE BARRY Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religi...
DAVE BARRY A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
DAVE BARRY Spiders so large they appear to be wearing the pelts of small mammals.
DAVE BARRY I gotta tell you, ... It's pretty crazy when you think about taking whatever's on the other end of t...
DAVE BARRY It was by far just a one-girl show. She led every offensive and defensive category for Bishop Kearne...
DAVE BARRY one of South Florida's most vital natural resources, a relentlessly sane voice in a howling hurrican...
DAVE BARRY drink beer. But that's kind of my goal pretty much wherever I go.
DAVE BARRY I'm very pleased that we made the top four. But I feel that we could have had a stronger showing.
DAVE BARRY I've been asked to make an announcement, ... There is a non-luxury car in the parking lot. We've bee...
DAVE BARRY The term SAT is a set of initials, or autonym, standing for Scholastic Attitude Treaty Organization.
DAVE BARRY We've actually gotten better musically over the years, ... But we've come to realize that we will ne...
DAVE BARRY Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it.
DAVE BARRY Like many members of the uncultured, Cheez-It consuming public, I am not good at grasping modern art...
DAVE BARRY I find myself having these conversations where I go...“You know, the guy, in that place. The guy i...
DAVE BARRY Some archeologists believe that Stonehenge - the mysterious arrangement of enormous elongated stones...
DAVE BARRY Ridley is a tea drinker.
DAVE BARRY It's a concept I've often thought of.
DAVE BARRY You get people from all walks of life here -- who work in domestic service.
DAVE BARRY I believe that's one of the finest action regurgitation scenes in the history of literature, ... I'd...
DAVE BARRY We became pretty sensitive about it. We visited Great Ormond Street Hospital when we were in England...
DAVE BARRY What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge ham...
DAVE BARRY I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.
DAVE BARRY Buying the right computer and getting it to work properly is no more complicated than building a nuc...
DAVE BARRY Because of the level of my chess game, I was able - even against a weak opponent, such as my younger...
DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ...
DAVE BARRY The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby’s grandparents. You feel completely comfortable ent...
DAVE BARRY Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast of current events. The ground is a giant d...
DAVE BARRY I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules,including:* Both of your socks sh...
DAVE BARRY Puns are little 'plays on words' that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look...
DAVE BARRY There comes a time in a man's life when he hears the call of the sea. If the man has a brain in his ...
DAVE BARRY The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winte...
DAVE BARRY It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
DAVE BARRY