Snake pulled out the digital camera and decided to play a joke on Otacon. He snapped a picture of the pinup, muttered, "Good," and closed the door.

The Snake in the fence is now inside the lungi

He looked about as inconspicuous as a tarantula on a slice of angel food

Don’t believe what you hear about those penguins. A species of lazy waddlers. Their extinction is immanent.

A customer facing crucial decisions:

What should I wipe myself with? What should I brush with? His personal hygiene was deteriorating rapidly as he stared at the rows of possibilities, sweating profusely. Would he ever bathe again?

Especially well known around the office is my weakness for dyspareunist women. Most people would find such disparity in unity repelling, but it harmonizes perfectly with my personal tastes.