PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors.

In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary, patriotism is defined as the last refuge of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer, I beg to submit that it is the first.

Patriotism is as fierce as a fever, pitiless as the grave, blind as a stone, and irrational as a headless hen

MAGNIFICENT, adj. Having a grandeur or splendor superior to that to which the spectator is accustomed, as the ears of an ass, to a rabbit, or the glory of a glowworm, to a maggot.

INEXPEDIENT, adj. Not calculated to advance one's interests.

POPULIST, n. A fossil patriot of the early agricultural period, found in the old red soapstone underlying Kansas . . .