Never be the first to arrive at a party or the last to go home and never, never be both

We walked straight home because the one person in my party was sprayed so badly he had to go home immediately and take a shower, ... He was still having problems with his eyes the next day.

[And he's still cleaning up from last night's party at his Nashville-area home for the parents of his daughter's classmates.] Kind of a yee-haw, the-kids-are-back-in-school kind of thing, ... Yep, I'm running a little late.

[Then, as now, the party was about much more than the game; it was about kids away from home for the first time, testing their limits and themselves, which might be, after all, the literal definition of education.] What's wrong with the Dionysian tradition of letting out what's normally repressed? ... College is about this kind of explosion. It should be a place where special excitements and possibilities are part of the package. I'm pretty sure drinking to excess predated our collegiate football leagues by, like, thousands of years.

It's the start of football season. It's like the kickoff party. We wait nine months for this day.

Recently I heard a 'wise guy' story that I had a party at my home for twenty-five men. It's an interesting story, but I don't know twenty-five men I'd want to invite ta a party.