My only relief is to sleep. When I'm sleeping, I'm not sad, I'm not angry, I'm not lonely, I'm nothing.

Sometimes,
all you can do
is lie in bed,
and hope
to fall asleep
before
you fall apart.

We've looked at it several ways. Statistically, the stronger case was for sleep being the link between racism and depression.

We found that perceived racism impacts the quality of their sleep and that disturbed sleep is related to depression. Individuals who have experienced racism could be thinking about what happened the previous day, feeling stressed about their ability to succeed when being judged by something other than merit ? skin tone or a different way of speaking. Sleep is the pathway through which racism affects depression.

I cry and wonder
how I'm going to fall asleep
because sleeping means waking
and going through all this again

One crying spell a day, & soon I will have gone insane.