Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.

I enjoy Saturday night racing.

Satire is what closes on Saturday night.

'Saturday Night Live' is live television. Nothing can compare to that.

If it's Saturday night, and you're sitting on your couch watching 'Showtime at the Apollo,' then you're not a man's man.