Men will pay large sums to whores for telling them they are not bores

There's only one good test of pornography. Get twelve normal men to read the book, and then ask them, ''Did you get an erection?'' If the answer is ''Yes'' from a majority of the twelve, then the book is pornographic.

All that we are not stares back at what we are

A tremendous number of people in America work very hard at something that bores them. Even a rich man thinks he has to go down to the office everyday. Not because he likes it but because he can't think of anything else to do.

If there are any of you at the back who do not hear me, please don't raise your hands because I am also nearsighted.

If time were the wicked sheriff in a horse opera, I'd pay for riding lessons and take his gun away.