marathon: (noun)
A popular form of overpriced torture wherein participants wake up at ass-o-clock in the morning and stand in the freezing cold until it's time to run, at which point they miserably trot for a god-awful interval of time that could be better spent sleeping in and/or consuming large quantities of beer and cupcakes.
See also: masochism, awfulness, "a bunch of bullshit", boob-chafing, cupcake deprivation therapy


Matthew Inman

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Absoballylutely top hole, wot. A and B the C of D I'd say. . . Above and Beyond the Call of Duty.
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Bom Bom...
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I realized that day that blessings come in a variety of shapes, colors, and sizes.
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I have to be seen to be believed.
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I declare before you all that my whole life, whether it be long or short, shall be devoted to your s...
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Madam President, speaking here in Dublin Castle it is impossible to ignore the weight of history, as...
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These wretched babies don't come until they are ready.
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So I'm not about to apologize for loving all these things about you, no matter the reasons or the ci...
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And life definitely doesn't want me

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Family is the most important thing in the world.
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You philosophers are lucky men. You write on paper and paper is patient. Unfortunate Empress that I ...
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I don't mind a big fascinator. I think there is more scope for artwork in a fascinator rather th...
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Taking part in an Olympics on home ground is something you dream about.
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The end must justify the means.
MATTHEW PRIOR
I met a preacher there I knew, and said, Ill and overworked, how fare you in this scene? Brave...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Ah, love, let us be true To one another! for the world, which seems To lie before us like a l...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
What then remains, but that we still should cry Not to be born, or being born to die.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
God's Wisdom and God's Goodness!--Ah, but fools Mis-define thee, till God knows them no more. ...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Others abide our question. Thou art free. We ask and ask--Thou smilest and art still, Out-top...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Hark! ah, the nightingale-- The tawny-throated! Hark from that moonlit cedar what a burst! ...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
On Sundays, at the matin-chime, The Alpine peasants, two and three, Climb up here to pray; ...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Six years--six little years--six drops of time.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
They live that they may eat, but he himself [Socrates] eats that he may live.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
This strange disease of modern life, With its sick hurry, its divided aims.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
The Greek word euphuia, a finely tempered nature, gives exactly the notion of perfection as culture...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
With aching hands and bleeding feet We dig and heap, lay stone on stone; We bear the burden an...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Her cabin'd ample spirit, It fluttered and fail'd for breath; Tonight it doth inherit Th...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Culture is "To know the best that has been said and thought in the world."
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Christianity is a source; no one supply of water and refreshment that comes from it can be called th...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Culture is the passion for sweetness and light, and (what is more) the passion for making them prev...
MATTHEW ARNOLD
The pursuit of the perfect, then, is the pursuit of sweetness and light.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
One thing only has been lent to youth and age in common--discontent.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Live to explain thy doctrine by thy life. - Matthew Prior,
MATTHEW PRIOR
The true meaning of religion is thus not simply morality, but morality touched by emotion.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Thy sum of duty let two words contain, (O may they graven in thy heart remain!) Be humble and ...
MATTHEW PRIOR
They talk most who have the least to say.
MATTHEW PRIOR
We are here on earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I do not know.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
Saw life steadily and saw it whole.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
[Oxford] Home of lost causes, and forsaken beliefs and unpopular names and impossible loyalties.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
The freethinking of one age is the common sense of the next.
MATTHEW ARNOLD
If Paris that brief flight allow, My humble tomb explore! It bears: "Eternity, be thou ...
MATTHEW ARNOLD