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Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope.


P. J. O'Rourke

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This is my formal letter of apology to the dairy cows...
ALISHIA DUNCANSON Can you fall in love through a rifle scope?
PETER HELLER J. P. Morgan. He was kind of a douche.
T. J. MILLER The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are an even bigger pain the second time around.
HERB CAEN The trouble with born again Christians is that they are an even bigger pain the second time around
HERB CAEN Unlike men, who are apt to stab a total stranger in a drunken brawl or run amuck with a high-powered...
ANN JONES Who needs a bullet piercing, armor piercing bullet to go hunting? Who needs an assault rifle to go h...
DON LEMON Vegans have a way of circling every conversation back to food, much like born-again Christians have ...
WILL POTTER This is 100 percent having to do with his faith of Scientology. He has no problem--and he's cashed p...
MATT STONE When you are investing in J. P. Morgan,
BRAD HINTZ I'm a cattle broker, mostly dairy cows. I am always looking for quality in a herd of cattle, but als...
LAVERNE SILVA There is always something to hunt.
DEREK JUDD Damn right, it's fun. There's good company. It's creative. It's adventurous. Combines high adventure...
TOMMY LEE JONES Damn right, it's fun. There's good company. It's creative. It's adventurous. Combines high adventure...
TOMMY LEE JONES Fewer than half of churchgoers, including born-again Christians, felt strongly that their church dem...
DAVID KINNAMAN As a general rule, people in this country don't know much about dairy cows. My job is to teach them ...
MIKE REEVES They're certainly making it harder for J&J to come back. Strategically we believe Boston Scientific ...
JOANNE WUENSCH They got a sniper rifle with a laser scope and when the targets would come out of a restaurant, they...
DENNY GRIFFIN I really like the P!nk song with the guy from fun., 'Just Give Me a Reason.'
PSY I was looking for a name with an old English sound, very easy to pronounce in every language and eas...
DIEGO DELLA VALLE Overall the capital markets were not strong for the company [J. P. Morgan],
ANDREW COLLINS The U.S. always needs an enemy. It comes and goes. Today it is Islam. According to this plan or ideo...
WALID JUMBLATT I like to think that the Internet and file sharing, if utilized properly and embraced, and I emphasi...
SEAL a very high-powered, well-recognized intelligence manager.
CUSTOMS ENFORCEMENT It's a totally different feeling now. It's fun again. Like high school. It's all so inspiring to me.
JOE SURRATT Cows are exceptionally gentle, loving beings who form strong bonds with their family and friends. Se...
MANGO WODZAK Big Walnut's got a high-powered offense and they're very physical.
DEREK SPANN Getting into a bidding war with J&J is bad enough. But getting into a cash-throwing contest with J&J...
CAROL LEVENSON The best find is that it is not the people with the mind but the FOOLS who make fun of a person with...
ANUJ SOMANY J. M. Barrie founded a celebrity cricket team with Arthur Conan Doyle, H. G. Wells, Jerome K. Jerome...
JOHN LLOYD My dad, Frank Addison Albini, was a terrific shot with a rifle and had generally excellent hunting s...
STEVE ALBINI Electricians that like good health avoid the known biologically toxic very high powered electrical u...
STEVEN MAGEE In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school student...
TINA FEY A lot of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You think when Jesus comes back he ever wants t...
BILL HICKS When Evanescence took time off, I bought a big concert harp and started taking lessons like I was in...
AMY LEE Problem solving is hunting. It is savage pleasure and we are born to it.
THOMAS HARRIS Problem-solving is hunting; it is savage pleasure and we are born to it.
THOMAS HARRIS My mate. Death incarnate. Night triumphant.
SARAH J. MAAS We need hope, or else we cannot endure.
SARAH J. MAAS Forget diamonds or dogs—a girl or boy's best friend is always a high-powered weapon.
SARAH A. HOYT Shortly after coming out, this person went back into the house with a rifle. The officers set up pos...
LT. DAVID WALTEMEYER What you've got here, essentially, is a very high-powered marketing operation--meaning Microsoft--ve...
GREG HILL A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
ARTIE LANGE The difficulty with any vehicle like that that's very low-powered is the currents.
ANDREW SHEPARD We love dogs and eat cows not because dogs and cows are fundamentally different--cows, like dogs, ha...
MELANIE JOY He lent a 19-year-old inexperienced driver who had a history of speeding and car accidents a high-po...
ROSEMARIE ARNOLD When you grow up on a dairy farm, cows don't take a day off. So you work every day and my dad al...
PAT SUMMITT It's okay to take yourself too seriously if you're a serious actor and you've got the sc...
T. J. MILLER I needed not to be dead when I agreed.”
“You needed not to be alone.
SARAH J. MAAS She didn’t know what to do with it, that rage. It still burned and hunted her, still made her want...
SARAH J. MAAS A quotation in a speech, article or book is like a rifle in the hands of an infantryman. It speaks w...
BRENDAN FRANCIS A quotation in a speech, article or book is like a rifle in the hands of an infantryman. It speaks w...
BRENDAN BEHAN This is fun. This feels like basketball again.
CLAY THOMLEY When he was young, I told Dale Jr. that hunting and racing are a lot alike. Holding that steering wh...
DALE EARNHARDT The hydrogen powered car, with its high fuel mileage and zero emission rate, is just one example of ...
DAN LIPINSKI Coaching the Bruins is like going bear hunting with a butter knife.
PAT BURNS Some say that grass is for cows. I guess clay is for making bricks.
GREG RUSEDSKI We are born and reborn again and again. We are changing with the waves of time.
DEBASISH MRIDHA We are thrilled to partner with the Mid-Atlantic Dairy Association as we deliver a fun and informati...
DON PAPSON If we keep the calves away from their mothers there is a real risk that dairy production will go out...
SIGRID AGENäS A vote is like a rifle; its usefulness depends upon the character of the user.
THEODORE ROOSEVELT A vote is like a rifle: its usefulness depends upon the character of the user.
THEODORE ROOSEVELT My take is that J&J would still like to do the deal but that Guidant is unwilling to negotiate the p...
PATRICK KASER Playing big, heroic characters with heart is always a lot of fun. I enjoy making movies like that, a...
DWAYNE JOHNSON The sickest people that I have met in the workplace are working with high powered electrical utility...
STEVEN MAGEE Committee chairs attract thousands of dollars from the lobby firms, companies and high-powered lobby...
GLEN MAXEY The current hunting regulations are established to maximize hunting opportunity while maintaining hi...
AL STEWART Die and born again, die and born again. It's the story of my life.
DONATELLA VERSACE If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.
UNKNOWN We have a high-powered first line that has been excellent. And our other lines do their roles [well]...
GREG HIRSCH All concepts of making a point is another failure of communication.
DEYTH BANGER Learning to live what you're born with is the process, the involvement, the making of a life.
DIANE WAKOSKI I think the record-high oil prices are still weighing on the market, ... Also, the Merck news is now...
JOE SUNDERMAN Kindness can thrive even amongst cruelty.
SARAH J. MAAS I wonder if some part of me knew what was waiting for me. That I would never be a gentle grower of t...
SARAH J. MAAS ...I'm not sure I can give my entire heart to him that way. And... and I love him enough to want him...
SARAH J. MAAS When do you come home to me?
SARAH J. MAAS She was scarcely a year older than I was, dark-haired, slender, with a face that would break your he...
GEORGE R.R. MARTIN This plucky NASA telescope is able to find planets en masse. If you compare planet hunting to prospe...
SETH SHOSTAK Today, we have our own concentrations of economic power. Instead of Standard Oil, U.S. Steel, the Un...
GEORGE PACKER For when a child is born the mother also is born again.
GILBERT PARKER There are other people in 'Dreamgirls' who are born-again Christians. We have a Bible study ...
BEN HARNEY Cheney has a real history of questionable hunting behavior. He is apparently obsessed with hunting a...
WAYNE PACELLE J&J has a basis for wanting a discount to the original terms and clearly seems headed down that path...
BOB HOPKINS J&J has a basis for wanting a discount to the original terms and clearly seems headed down that path...
BOB HOPKINS Turkey hunters can again look forward to high quality year of turkey hunting. Populations were good ...
ANDREA MEZERA When she left I realized my roommate, Dave, was awake the whole time and was witness to my entire in...
CHAD KULTGEN Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and...
WOODY ALLEN I'd like to collaborate with Jay-Z and Mary J. Blige.
ROBIN THICKE Many cows are fed a high-protein diet, which creates a more liquid manure that is easier to spray on...
CHARLES DUHIGG Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.
P.J. O'ROURKE Christians awake, salute the happy morn Whereon the Saviour of the world was born.
JOHN BYROM Christians awake, salute the happy morn, / Whereon the Saviour of the world was born.
JOHN BYROM I just jumped for it like I've done a million times. ... It was like I was shot in the back of my kn...
DARREN FENSTER Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art, like the universe itself (for God did not need...
C.S. LEWIS Wilkinson had a lot of high-powered influence in the United States, Spain and France. Wilkinson comm...
DEBORAH ESPINOSA Eighty dollars is a 'wow' number ? I don't think there's any way J&J can rationally compete with tha...
DAVID HEUPEL There are so many soulful singers, even the ones coming from London, like Adele and Jessie J, who ar...
BRITNEY SPEARS Hunting whales is like hunting tigers (or) gorillas. New Zealanders regard it as unjustifiable,
CHRIS CARTER That is always the elephant in the room with J&J. Everyone wants to know what is going on in M&A, an...
BRUCE CRANNA

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P. J. O'ROURKE If it were not for government regulation of big corporations, executives at companies like Enron, Wo...
P. J. O'ROURKE You can learn all about the human condition from covering the crime beat in a big city - you don'...
P. J. O'ROURKE The perpetuation of slavery, the exile and extermination of American Indians, and the passage of Jim...
P. J. O'ROURKE Northwest Ohio is flat. There isn't much up. The land is so flat that a child from Toledo is und...
P. J. O'ROURKE The 20th century was a test bed for big ideas - fascism, communism, the atomic bomb.
P. J. O'ROURKE A fundamental American question is, 'What's the big idea?'
P. J. O'ROURKE Preachers at black churches are the last people left in the English-speaking world who know the sche...
P. J. O'ROURKE Politics is a necessary evil, or a necessary annoyance, a necessary conundrum.
P. J. O'ROURKE If I were a congressman who had voted for the American Jobs Creation Act of 2004, I'd claim it w...
P. J. O'ROURKE The inherent purpose of American government is let people seek their own goals and to encourage them...
P. J. O'ROURKE Detroit's industrial ruins are picturesque, like crumbling Rome in an 18th-century etching.
P. J. O'ROURKE I like fiction and the kind of history that gives the grace and flavor of fiction to the past. No bl...
P. J. O'ROURKE Daniel Patrick Moynihan is the archetypal extremely smart person who went into politics anyway inste...
P. J. O'ROURKE Kids are disorganized.
P. J. O'ROURKE People say free trade causes dislocation. In actual fact, it's the lowering of trade barriers th...
P. J. O'ROURKE Distracting a politician from governing is like distracting a bear from eating your baby.
P. J. O'ROURKE Writing is turning one's worst moments into money.
J P DONLEAVY Inside every Sancho Panza there's a Don Quixote struggling to get out.
P. J. O'ROURKE Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino's box.
P. J. O'ROURKE In Hong Kong there is agglomeration beyond my fondest imaginings. The Kowloon district claims a popu...
P. J. O'ROURKE There are plenty of problems in the world, and doubtless climate change - or whatever the currently ...
P. J. O'ROURKE Kuwait City is not gorgeous, actually, but it's got a kind of Epcot Center thing going for it. I...
P. J. O'ROURKE The importance of local governance may not be obvious to an America accustomed to treating city and ...
P. J. O'ROURKE Political discourse has become so rotten that it's no longer possible to tell the stench of one ...
P. J. O'ROURKE Israel is slightly smaller than New Jersey. Moses in effect led the tribes of Israel out of the Dist...
P. J. O'ROURKE It could be that all awful dictators are frustrated artists - Mao with his poetry and Mussolini with...
P. J. O'ROURKE I'm too tough and sensitive to have to have some pubescent twerp with his mom's earring in h...
P. J. O'ROURKE Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.
P. J. O'ROURKE Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefull...
P. J. O'ROURKE I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a learning experience. Then again, I like to think ...
P. J. O'ROURKE The purpose of a funeral service is to comfort the living. It is important at a funeral to display e...
P. J. O'ROURKE There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-...
P. J. O'ROURKE With Epcot Center the Disney corporation has accomplished something I didn't think possible in today...
P. J. O'ROURKE When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are le...
P. J. O'ROURKE Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and ...
P. J. O'ROURKE