Like a lot of Iowans, I have to drive just to meet basic needs, ... Am I going to drive into town for a loaf of bread and a half gallon of milk or am going into town to play cards with friends? Probably not. So it's definitely fewer trips.

Shipping is really not a problem in most places. It's something that needs to be arranged, and once you figure out how to arrange it, a whole new shopping world opens up to you.

We can't sit on the sidelines and hope for a call from Oscar De La Hoya. He needs a good show on TV and that would be taking out an 18-0, up-and-coming kid. I pursued the fight because I believe it's a very winnable fight for Pushup and he's prepared hard for it.

I was always a funny guy. I don't think anybody that makes it to this level of stand-up wasn't a funny guy when they were young.

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

People are saying that I'm an alcoholic, and that's not true, because I only drink when I work, and I'm a workaholic.