Life's biggest struggle: I need to pee, but I don't want to get out of bed.


Anonymous

  Email Quote to Friends   Link to Quote   Create Short URL  Publish Text About This Quote   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Quotes For You

Related

I dont want to be broke down I want to be built up and vice versa I dont want to break down but buil...
HEATHER MONTANO
That's the biggest part of doing comics: You have to create stuff that makes you want to get out...
DANIEL CLOWES
You’re the reason I get up in the morning.
That, and I need to pee.
DARYNDA JONES
I think that we need to get along together if we want to survive in the twenty-first century.
SARAH POLLEY
It's a struggle to get out of bed in the morning. Looking at myself and seeing I was not happy with ...
ERIC MOULTON
You cant live champagne life,if you cant buy beer.
I DONT KNOW
Don't lie to yourself?
SONYA.E.WILLIAMS
I don't need to go to gamblers anonymous or anything but I like a flutter,
NICK ATKINSON
Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irr...
FRAN LEBOWITZ
I've died many deaths, but I'm still not dead. I've lived may lifes, inside my head. Reality is but ...
AERIAL NICOLE MITCHELL
Look, Candida, I don't want to pee on your picnic...
NINA MALKIN
Get this (economic plan) passed. Later on, we can all debate it.
, TO NEW HAMPSHIRE LEGISLATORS
Believe me, you have to get up early if you want to get out of bed
GROUCHO MARX
'I dont need it to be easy, I need it to be worth it
LIL WAYNE
We dont know what were going to go home to, ... If we dont have anything anymore, Im not sure I want...
IAN WILLIAMSON
I want to do whatever I can to survive.
SAM SIMON
I searched for something witty to say, settled for bare honesty. "I want to pee.
LILI ST. CROW
Einstein wrote that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result....
DAVID SEDARIS
I want to wake up next to what I went to bed with. I need a girl who can get dressed up to come with...
PAUL WALKER
I love clothes but it's a struggle for me to get out of jeans and a baggy jumper.
LILY JAMES
I want to live my life in such a way that when I get out of bed in the morning, the devil says, "aw ...
STEVE MARABOLI
You don't need your mouth to pee.
THE BROTHERS GRIMM
The market is still waiting for HSBC results, which will have a big impact on the direction of the m...
ANDREW TO
Property shares had a technical rebound, but interest rate concerns will still affect properties unt...
ANDREW TO
Bank of China's results were quite good; double-digit growth can be taken as good results for a bank...
ANDREW TO
The index tried to challenge 18,000 but failed, so that triggered profit taking. Tokyo's slide also ...
ANDREW TO
Trading seems to be focusing on selective counters because investors are cautious amid interest rate...
ANDREW TO
We're seeing a minor technical rebound after Wall Street rebounded from two days of losses. The key ...
ANDREW TO
Some investors have returned to pick up the stock at bargain prices.
ANDREW TO
I think the take-up for the placement is not too good and other property developers may be discourag...
ANDREW TO
We are afraid that our freedoms and liberties will be infringed in the future.
ANDREW TO
I think there was some minor selling pressure on telecom stocks as the market continued to see a wea...
ANDREW TO
i want to be the best i can be but when i cant i'll try my best to achieve my goal my goals in life ...
DALLY SALAD
Well, I don't use the toilet much to pee in. I almost always pee in the yard or the garden, because ...
IGGY POP
How should I know?" said Alice, surprised at her own courage. "It's no business of mine."
The Q...
LEWIS CARROLL
I offered to pee on him, but they said no
JAMES PATTERSON
I think I'm more of a momentum hitter. Once I get going, I'm more of a confident hitter. Once I stop...
ASHLEY LYNN
The way I see it: Why get out of bed when you can read about people who got out of bed?
-ERIC FOREMAN THAT 70'S SHOW
Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of.
ANON.
Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of.
UNKNOWN
Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of.
ANONYMOUS
Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of.
ANONYMOUS
Afore me! It is so very late,
That we may call it early by and by.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
i dont want to be compared to britney,ashlee,hilary or lindsay. i want to be compared to me.
AVRIL LAVIGNE
Well, I don't use the toilet much to pee in. I almost always pee in the yard or the garden, beca...
IGGY POP
We need to get the street kid out of these kids. If we don't, we have problems, and that's the bigge...
BOB ARCURIO
To get to Columbus is nice, but I just don't want to get there. I want to finish this out.
DRU JOYCE
If you dont get what you want,you wont want what you get.
KENNETH ELLIOTT HUDSON
Do you know what Albert Einstein's definition of insanity was?"
"No."
"Doing the same th...
CHRISTIAN CANTRELL
One of the better definitions of insanity - doing the exact same thing over and over and expecting t...
ANTHONY KIEDIS
I dont want the kind of love thats in movies, I want my own kind,
LYNDSEY ANN-MARIE SHEPARD
“Beer is the reason I get out of bed every afternoon.”
ASHISH KUMAR
Before I get out of bed, I am saying thank you. I know how important it is to be thankful.
AL JARREAU
From the very first day, I never had to get him out of bed to come to work.
DONALD SPARROW
Getting over what you did to me is not why I get out of bed anymore.
NAOMI SHIHAB NYE
There's a difference between hitting putts there and actually getting out and playing, so I'm surpri...
BRADLEY DREDGE
when im mad i usually punch a wall but that doesnt work so when your mad you dont need to punch a wa...
DALLY SALAD
What I want to say would be out of character for me to say, but we just need to get out heads out of...
JASON COLLINS
Was it animal pee or human pee? Someone asked.
How would I know? What, am I an expert in the st...
JOHN GREEN
I have already joined myself in marriage to a husband, namely the kingdom of England.
ELIZABETH I (SPOKEN TO HER PARLAMENT)
I don't get out of bed for less than $10,000 a day.
LINDA EVANGELISTA
Our biggest problem is going to be the environment. But I know if my lights were out, I'd want someo...
DAVE SKINNER
When I've gone back to work, it's always with that sense of inevitability. That may be a com...
DANIEL DAY-LEWIS
Dixon Steele: You know, when you first walked into the police station, I said to myself, “There sh...
DOROTHY B. HUGHES
I want a big career, a big man, and a big life. You have to think big - that's the only way to get i...
MIA FARROW
I dont need a luxury life, I wanna happy and healthy life
RODZIDAH (ELIZABETH)
Lying in my bed, I pray for a dreamless sleep... but if I am to dream, I want to dream of her.
E.L. JAMES
Lifes a bitch and it doesn't even put out.
CHRIS PATTERSON
I wasn't going to have enough money to pay for a Good Lifestyle, which meant I'd feel ashamed, which...
NED VIZZINI
Dont try to go too fast. Learn your job. Dont ever talk until you know what youre talking about. If ...
SAM RAYBURN
I want to be as big as I can be. I want to be one of the biggest artists. I want to be remembered li...
LIL UZI VERT
Romance is like having to go through security at airports in order to get on the plane.
BOBBY W. MILLER
O yes youwl want to think on that you dont want your mouf to walk you where your feet dont want to g...
RUSSELL HOBAN
Money talks. I want the biggest fight. Whoever I've got to fight - the biggest show, biggest pay...
NATE DIAZ
You want to know my real pleasure? Food. I love chocolate. I can't get enough chocolate. I can&#...
BRIAN WILSON
When it gets bad enough, where it is affecting academic work - crying, can't get out of bed, a feeli...
DR. DENISE DESCHENES
If things are going well, if the writing's coming along, I jump out of bed happy. And if the pre...
ROBERT CARO
Training is full-on. Some days I really don't want to get out of bed and hit that track again. S...
JESSICA ENNIS
I love Starbucks. Maybe that's a bit sad. But I definitely need my caffeine. It's what gets ...
NIKKI SIXX
My biggest job really is to figure other people out. I need to understand what makes a person tick.
STEPHEN A. SCHWARZMAN
She went to the locker room to throw up. I wanted her to go home and get in bed, but she didn't want...
AHMIL JIHAD
I know you are, but what am I? As Pee-Wee Herman
PAUL REUBENS
I know you are, but what am I? [As Pee-Wee Herman]
PAUL REUBENS
the thing is you can get used to anything you think you cant you want to die but you dont you cant y...
ELIZABETH SCOTT
Singing, writing songs, is kind of my biggest fear, but it's the thing I feel I need to conquer.
CARA DELEVINGNE
That night was my first exposure to the life I was supposed to be living at my age. I dont know, I d...
CRIMETHINC.
people dont know you till they meet you. dont smile if you dont want to, dont be a false person, don...
CAROLINA JANETTE GOMEZ GONZALEZ
I heard a lot of people trying to get out. I saw a crowd of people but I didn't want to be nosey.
JACOB CRUZ
I don't want the cheese, I just want to get out of the trap.
LATIN PROVERB
I don't want the cheese, I just want to get out of the trap
SPANISH PROVERB
I didn't want to go to bed with him, but I wanted him to know how much I looked and appreciated him.
CLARK GABLE
I tend to work in coffee shops. I need to get out of the house, and, well, I need the coffee.
BRYAN COGMAN
To much has happened too fast Dear Diary. What I want is for nothing to happen at all.
I don't...
LEE SMITH
I'm pleased with how far we've come. I'm not happy with where we are. I think we need to get better....
CHARLIE COE
The biggest benefit I get from the curriculum supermarket is to find my unknowing things. To answer ...
YANG YANG
If we were rational creatures we would never get out of bed or live or love.
BELINDA JEFFREY
I want a big career, a big man, and a big life. You have to think big - that's the only way to g...
MIA FARROW
Living is a risk,' I snapped at him. 'Every decision, every interaction, every step, every time you ...
MARIA V. SNYDER
I hate to keep harping on it, but we're young and we don't have the people to run in and out like we...
WALLY KESLING
I don't want to go to work and get into bed with someone else, not even Tom Cruise. It's not like I ...
CAMERON DIAZ

More Anonymous

Animals are human just like us in a different shape and form so do not abuse them.
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS
You don't have to touch someone to love them, It's not in the kiss, It's in the times you don't kiss...
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS
Glory be to Him who changes others and remains Himself unchanged!
ANONYMOUS
Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone one who loves is born of God an...
ANONYMOUS
May the God who gives endurance and encouragement
give you a spirit of unity among yourselves ...
ANONYMOUS
Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon them.
ANONYMOUS
Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can be...
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what y...
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
ANONYMOUS
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
ANONYMOUS
He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
ANONYMOUS
All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
ANONYMOUS
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do yo...
ANONYMOUS
A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
ANONYMOUS
Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.
ANONYMOUS
Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...b...
ANONYMOUS
Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her o...
ANONYMOUS
Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family d...
ANONYMOUS
The most expensive wedding usually ends with the quickest divorce.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
ANONYMOUS
Leadership is the ability to hide your panic from others.
ANONYMOUS
An expert knows all the answers -- if you ask the right questions.
ANONYMOUS
Time cuts down all, Both great and small.
ANONYMOUS
Few cases of eyestrain have been developed by looking on the bright side of things.
ANONYMOUS
Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Canaveral.
ANONYMOUS
Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. •Anonymous Many an o...
ANONYMOUS
Some of the smallest situations are the biggest to some people.
ANONYMOUS
Man endures pain as an undeserved punishment; woman accepts it as a natural heritage.
ANONYMOUS
Defeat may test you; it need not stop you. If at first you don't succeed, try another way. For eve...
ANONYMOUS
Anarchy - it's not the law, it's just a good idea.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
ANONYMOUS
A friend is one to whom you can pour out the contents of your heart, chaff and grain alike. Knowin...
ANONYMOUS
Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and u...
ANONYMOUS
She is clothed in strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
ANONYMOUS
many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. charm is deceptive, beauty is fleeting; but a ...
ANONYMOUS
Lady Wisdom will be your close friend; and Brother Knowledge will be your pleasant companion.
ANONYMOUS
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
ANONYMOUS
It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is possible only when one is busy. The body must toil, the mind must be occupied, and the ...
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is like jam. You can't spread even a little without getting some on yourself.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is the overcoming of not unknown obstacles toward a known goal.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness seems to be the result of something happening — inactivity is not very exhilarating.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not pleasure, it's victory.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passe...
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not given but exchanged.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes f...
ANONYMOUS
If happiness could be brought, few of us could pay the price.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you turn your a...
ANONYMOUS
So live that your memories will be part of your happiness.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness consists in activity; such as the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and ...
ANONYMOUS
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not always measured in smiles.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness lies in our own backyard, but it's probably well hidden by crabgrass.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
ANONYMOUS
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
ANONYMOUS
Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle ...
ANONYMOUS
Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
ANONYMOUS
To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
ANONYMOUS
My friend, why have you drifted so far away? All motion is relative, maybe it is you who have moved ...
ANONYMOUS
The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends, And no investment on the street pa...
ANONYMOUS
Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
ANONYMOUS
Remember that the faith that moves mountains always carries a pick.
ANONYMOUS
When you laugh, be sure to laugh at what people do and not at what people are.
ANONYMOUS
The sound of a kiss is much softer than that of a cannon - but it's echo lasts a great deal longer.
ANONYMOUS
Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding i...
ANONYMOUS
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
ANONYMOUS
When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my l...
ANONYMOUS
Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.
ANONYMOUS
Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS
I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, ...
ANONYMOUS
تبسمك في وجه أخيك صدقة، وأمرك بالمعروف صدقة ونهيك عن ال...
ANONYMOUS
The first men to be created and formed were called the Sorcerer of Fatal Laughter, the Sorcerer of N...
ANONYMOUS
Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you...
ANONYMOUS
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
ANONYMOUS
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for ...
ANONYMOUS
Anyone who is having troubles should pray. Anyone who is happy should sing praises. Anyone who is si...
ANONYMOUS
I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.
ANONYMOUS
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
ANONYMOUS
Store front sign: Entire store on sale, everything $1 or more.
ANONYMOUS
If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.
ANONYMOUS
Why didn't Bruce Willis play the lead role in Titanic? He would have saved everyone.
ANONYMOUS
I'm looking to buy a new boomerang, how can I throw the old one out?
ANONYMOUS
My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!
ANONYMOUS
If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters.
ANONYMOUS
Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
ANONYMOUS
It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too,...
ANONYMOUS
One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less t...
ANONYMOUS
The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
ANONYMOUS
In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.
ANONYMOUS
How do you get a Kleenex to dance?
Put a little boogy in it!
ANONYMOUS
For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there.
ANONYMOUS
Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!
ANONYMOUS
I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
ANONYMOUS
Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
ANONYMOUS
If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
ANONYMOUS
The last thing that blew my mind was the wind.
ANONYMOUS
Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of...
ANONYMOUS
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I ...
ANONYMOUS
Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits.
ANONYMOUS
Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas.
ANONYMOUS
My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.
ANONYMOUS
Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
ANONYMOUS
Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
ANONYMOUS
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
ANONYMOUS
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
ANONYMOUS
When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
ANONYMOUS
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible.
ANONYMOUS
When the cop told me to give him my first name and last name I told him, 'Are you crazy? What's my ...
ANONYMOUS
Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then always be a unicorn.
ANONYMOUS
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
ANONYMOUS
I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding.
ANONYMOUS
Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
ANONYMOUS
I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.
ANONYMOUS
Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
ANONYMOUS
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
ANONYMOUS
Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
ANONYMOUS
I bet you anything that I can stop gambling right now.
ANONYMOUS
My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too ...
ANONYMOUS
Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X.
ANONYMOUS
I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
ANONYMOUS
People think.....
I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky.
I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. ANONYMOUS
I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. T...
ANONYMOUS
I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
ANONYMOUS
Chuck Norris is so amazing he can:

Light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.<...
ANONYMOUS
Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time a...
ANONYMOUS
He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this ...
ANONYMOUS
I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition.
ANONYMOUS
I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
ANONYMOUS
Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park.
ANONYMOUS
It's 11PM, do you know where your pants are?
ANONYMOUS
Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of and coax them along with a carrot. Some yo...
ANONYMOUS
Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're...
ANONYMOUS
Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!
ANONYMOUS
I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake.
ANONYMOUS
How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
ANONYMOUS
My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museu...
ANONYMOUS
Birthdays are nature's way of feeding us cake.
ANONYMOUS
What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
ANONYMOUS
I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.
ANONYMOUS
There was a robot invented in China that catches thieves. In Australia it caught 10 thieves, in Ame...
ANONYMOUS
I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows.
ANONYMOUS
How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? They both have an iPhone.
ANONYMOUS
Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
ANONYMOUS
Smile while you still have teeth.
ANONYMOUS
Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.
ANONYMOUS
After many years of studying my Geography book I finally know by heart that Australia is on page 23.
ANONYMOUS
Funny sign at health spa: Fresh 10,000 year old mud for sale.
ANONYMOUS
I always mean what I say, I don't always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.
ANONYMOUS
I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
ANONYMOUS
True love is truly amazing only when it's truly true.
ANONYMOUS
Being married means mostly shouting "What?" from other rooms.
ANONYMOUS
Is it good if a blow dryer blows?
ANONYMOUS
Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
ANONYMOUS
Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
ANONYMOUS
Never judge a book by it's movie
ANONYMOUS
I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my ...
ANONYMOUS
When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.
ANONYMOUS
Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself.
ANONYMOUS
If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your sm...
ANONYMOUS
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
ANONYMOUS
I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.
ANONYMOUS
Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast...
ANONYMOUS
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close ...
ANONYMOUS
Today I saw something through a store window that was truly stunning, beautiful and sexy. I wanted ...
ANONYMOUS
Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon.
ANONYMOUS
Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
ANONYMOUS
I'm not really a control freak, but... can I show the right way to do that?
ANONYMOUS
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
ANONYMOUS
I once finished first on my running team, then the coach asked me where everyone else is.
ANONYMOUS
Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
ANONYMOUS
Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red!
ANONYMOUS
Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing.
ANONYMOUS
Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge.
ANONYMOUS
I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down.
ANONYMOUS
The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people al...
ANONYMOUS
I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom.
ANONYMOUS
The amount of time it takes for a minute to go by is proportionally dependent with the distance to t...
ANONYMOUS
Bathroom sign above toilet: It's like basketball, the basket is bigger than the ball! Learn to sco...
ANONYMOUS
I can't wait for that to never happen.
ANONYMOUS
I liked the movie Titanic, my favorite character was the iceberg.
ANONYMOUS
Sports top moment: to score a goal but miss in the re-play.
ANONYMOUS
Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light.
ANONYMOUS
Rudeness top moment: to scare an ostrich on an asphalt street.
ANONYMOUS
I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.
ANONYMOUS
Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast.
ANONYMOUS
Beauty is mysterious as well as terrible.
ANONYMOUS
An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study.
ANONYMOUS
My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me."
ANONYMOUS
Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face.
ANONYMOUS
You can't please everyone, you're not a Nutella jar.
ANONYMOUS
Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.
ANONYMOUS
It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase al...
ANONYMOUS
If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patte...
ANONYMOUS
Whenever you feel stupid, remember that there are people outside searching for Pokemon.
ANONYMOUS