Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. (Perhaps Cy Burnett) .

Being a newspaper columnist is like being married to a nymphomaniac. It's great for the first two weeks.

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

The game of life is a lot like football. You have to tackle your problems, block your fears, and score your points when you get the opportunity.

Yankees don't understand that the Southern way of talking is a language of nuance. What we can do in the South is we can take a word and change it just a little bit and make it mean something altogether different.