FastSaying

It's still really kind of a penalty for what we did to ourselves back last spring.


Dave Orton

  Email Quote to Friends   Link to Quote   Create Short URL  Publish Text About This Quote   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Quotes For You

Related

We just kind of put out a dream list of mixers, and that included Dave and other such impossibilitie...
MATT BROWN They (Herscher) ran the opening kickoff back for a touchdown. We did the same thing but it was calle...
ROBERT GRAY We've been on this roller-coaster pattern really going back to last spring.
DAVID ROBINSON Each of us views life through a different lens. What we think is colored by the baggage we carry, an...
LAURIE BUCHANAN, PHD That was the difference really in the game, the second period. We had battled back, we didn't look v...
BRYAN MURRAY It took a lot for Dave to say what he did. It took more for Joe to quit.
DARRELL HARVEY My mother brought me numerous times to visit Orton as a child, and I have visited the gardens with m...
LOUIS BACON We had a cousin serving overseas, so we kind of put ourselves in his shoes and thought about what it...
BRITTANY BERGQUIST We can't feel sorry about ourselves and take back what we did. We've just got to bounce back and win...
OLLI JOKINEN I had a dream about you last night. Eons ago, we created a Universe, then sat back and watched minia...
MICHAEL SUMMERS Washington will bring a lot of pressure, ... We have to be sound, no matter who's back there. In pre...
FRED MILLER I think its really disappointing. Jim Thome did a lot of good things for this town. It was kind of e...
OZZIE GUILLEN Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duty, and so bear ourselves that if the British Empire and i...
WINSTON CHURCHILL Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duties, and so bear ourselves that if the British Empire and...
WINSTON S. CHURCHILL With the guys we have coming back and obviously our coaching staff and kind of the foundation we've ...
BRADY QUINN They did not play well. (We) still had a good chance to win, but were very weak at penalty kicks as ...
LARRY FLEMING He's pitching as well as anyone we have this spring. He's throwing harder than he did when we got hi...
BOBBY COX I thought we could take something from last week's game. That gave us some experience in that situat...
KATE BAKER We played the last eight minutes of the game and the first eight minutes of the game, we just did no...
SHARON ALLEN We still feel it's important to have them pay a penalty for the past violations.
LAURENCE LAU Los Angeles is a city looking for a ritual to join its fragments, and The Doors are looking for such...
JIM MORRISON This isn't what we had hoped for. We're hoping to come back and play a lot better than what did towa...
ANNA KRAMER This was kind of a character test for us to see if we'd battle back, and we did.
MIKE MCKEE We wanted to come down here and do better than we did last year. This was not the kind of game that ...
AL NORTHINGTON Trump was our last shot. I kind of thought it was Romney, and then lo and behold, like a miracle, Tr...
ANN COULTER It went back and forth. It basically was kind of a controversial call because he didn't get some bac...
BRIAN GALLAGHER We want to do for 'Hamlet' what Baz Luhrmann did for 'Romeo and Juliet' in terms of ...
EMILE HIRSCH [The jury] obviously had some issues back there as to what the evidence was, and there had to be som...
DAVID PARRY We've had good preparation because of it. It was kind of a wakeup call for a lot of the guys that ar...
GREG APPLETON Merrill Lynch is way below its highs of last spring, ... This (Internet) announcement doesn't really...
JAMES SCHMIDT This is not something that we wanted, ... We dug ourselves into a pretty big hole, but we came back....
SHERYL SWOOPES The last game we didn't have Meier and we played a poor first half. We had to fight back and took a ...
FRANK SCHADE I Still Know What You Did Last Summer.
JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT We're starting to figure out what kind of a team we are. We played Florida State well last week, but...
MATHIAS KIWANUKA But, I still can't totally forgive Dave for blowing my world apart. DO YOU HEAR THAT, DAVE?!
K.M. SHEA What we've done this spring has kind of prepared us for opening day.
JOSH WILLINGHAM All but Dave on the end peg struggled for anything other than really small roach - four or five to t...
PAUL FROST We kind of fell apart in the first inning. We kind of found ourselves intimidated. We did show a lot...
JASON CASTRO Most of us think we're too busy or too important to rest for a day.
CRAIG GROESCHEL We didn't really have any plans for spring break so this was very nice. We are still on a high from ...
DAN STUMPE They did a lot of work last week. Their spring break consisted of Sunday and Monday.
DAVE MANZO I like how you don't hide your problems like everyone else, and I don't have to hide mine when I'm a...
NED VIZZINI We always prided ourselves in being a fraternity that did not take just one kind of kids.
JASON KASSOY What happens if you are the last (the very, very last) of your species, and you die - and humans not...
ROBERT KRULWICH Those are outstanding numbers and show what kind of season he had for us. What has been very rewardi...
DAN PFAFF We really think of ourselves as phenomenal people. We're still a work in progress.
CHAD BAKER For some reason every spring quite a few people move. That helps the list to move. It's just kind of...
MIKE GOUHIN There was still trepidation (last spring). I was just trying to survive.
JEFF CIRILLO (Donald) missed a little putt on 10, and we both were kind of spilling oil. But, boy, he came right ...
BILLY MAYFAIR We did a great job on the penalty kill and your goaltender is your best penalty killer.
BOB EMERY We're still going to have to see what the benefits will look like based on what kind of programs com...
ANDREA MCCAULEY We have to ask ourselves, 'What kind of world is it where a baby-food executive substitutes arti...
PAUL HAWKEN After last Friday, it was kind of a gut check for us to see what we were made of.
DAVE KLINGEL I don't think we did a very good job of rising to the challenge and kind of went back on our heels. ...
BRACEY BARKER We did not expect such a heavy penalty. We are shocked.
HALUK ULUSOY He missed it and came back last spring. He's bought into what we're doing. We're pounding it inside ...
BILL SWAN The words you can’t find, you borrow.
We read to know we’re not alone. We read because w...
GABRIELLE ZEVIN I think what we did was slack up on a lot of it, and that's what caused the problems. So when we red...
THERESA ADAMS Next year we want to redeem ourselves, and we'll do exactly what we did last year, work as a team, g...
ALEX HERTENSTEIN One night in practice we just threw him back there to see what would happen - kind of a garbage-can ...
DICK ISAACSON I really like this young quarterback (Kyle Orton). He's very efficient. The speed of the game doesn'...
KYLE ORTON In every passing moment that is not appreciated time cannot give it back to you. So in moments of id...
GARY F EVANS... Kyle continues his unbeaten streak in the league. It was good to have Nate Spring back, but we still...
CHIP LANGMAID This is what we have been trying to position ourselves for over the last two years. We have been wor...
DON ROOT As coaches, the expectations are really what we put on ourselves. They (Ravens' fans) are accustomed...
SCOTT HORSTMAN Dave really is sorry, deeply sorry for the things he's done. Dave is willing to do the penance he ha...
MIKE DEVINE [And he's still cleaning up from last night's party at his Nashville-area home for the parents of hi...
PHIL VASSAR We really ought to give ourselves a collective pat on the back for doing as well as we have in a uni...
DOUGLAS COUPLAND He prepared us well. He let us figure out how to win by ourselves. He did his role perfectly just to...
DAN OZIMINSKI For all its terrible faults, in one sense America is still the last, best hope of mankind, because i...
FERDINAND MOUNT Let us ask ourselves; What kind of people do we think we are?
RONALD REAGAN We reach for the same brand not because we trust its quality but because we want to reassure ourselv...
DAVID MCRANEY I thought last year was a miraculous year for him. And he definitely earned my respect last year as ...
DAVE DUNCAN Joe really loosened us up. We were a bit tight. Joe has been carrying us on his back for the last tw...
DAN HINOTE It's really helped, I think, to raise the level of officiating. We now look at ourselves differently...
DOUG ELGIN We started hearing about all the heartbreak people were going through and that's when we learned wha...
T'ANNE SAMSON We got blamed for penalty after penalty after penalty.
GREG AUSTIN For the most part, we had some kids that stepped up and did a really nice job. We had guys bounce ba...
DAN LEY We knew coming in this would be their biggest game, being their rival. We wanted to win in our last ...
AARON WIES We want to continue what we did in the run game and get back to the Knox College-style of passing wh...
ANDY GIBBONS If we all did the things we are really capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.
THOMAS A. EDISON I think we did it to ourselves. We were kind of sleepwalking and took quick shots. We didn't make th...
DAVE PETTIT We took fourth at state last year and we've got five guys coming back. But we are going to have to p...
ARTHUR MIYAZAKI What we must try to be, of course, is ourselves and wholeheartedly. We must find out what we really ...
NELSON BOSWELL While we have the utmost respect for coach Willingham, his staff, his players and the university, .....
BOB MORTON You let down a minute, a minute and a half and they're right back in the ball game. I don't think it...
INGER HODGSON We find ourselves in a much better position than we did last year touring because then we had only a...
ALEX KAPRANOS We could not have done what we did for four years without that kind of support.
ANGEL RIVERA We still expect our customers to resume buying fertilizer for the spring planting.
DAVID TOWNSEND For us, that's a challenge every week. We have to apply ourselves, which we did last time. Our react...
ELI JUAREZ We probably would have been really angry with ourselves if we had given up a score, ... but we pulle...
RAY HENDERSON We pride ourselves on our penalty killing. It's considered a privilege to be out on the ice with the...
BRAD ROBERTS They did a good job of keeping us off the boards. We felt we needed this game. We did all you can as...
LISA LESLIE We did it last year, so we know we can do it. It was kind of exciting.
BILL VICKROY I'm not saying that I'm better than anyone... I'm just saying that I'm one-of-a-kind.
C LIONG A family is like a card game, on one hand, you can get a really bad hand and on the other, your hand...
GARY F EVANS... We spend most of our time and energy in a kind of horizontal thinking. We move along the surface of ...
JAMES CARROLL We really started to develop last spring. We began talking about how next year our cross country tea...
GREG GOVAN We kind of put ourselves on cruise control. We didn't keep pushing and kind of relaxed. Then it hit ...
ASHLEY COOK We still see that people don't really realize that electric cars are here right now. And when we...
FRANZ VON HOLZHAUSEN

More Dave Orton

Short-term, chip sets is the fastest-growing part of our business but we have to attack the margins ...
DAVE ORTON This transaction brings ATI two important elements -- presence in a country that is emerging as the ...
DAVE ORTON The upside to smoking is that you get to be social. I was looking for a light when I bumped into Ben...
BETH ORTON The humble and meek are thirsting for blood.
JOE ORTON You can have all sorts of relationships, but there's something with musicians working together where...
BETH ORTON We're all like little ants who scurry around with the materials that are at hand right now. Each gen...
BETH ORTON The way I write, words can means lots of different things.
BETH ORTON The upside to smoking is that you get to be social. I was looking for a light when I bumped into Ben...
BETH ORTON I'd say my greatest fear is fear itself.
BETH ORTON I don't believe in trouble. Because I think that trouble is sometimes good, sometimes bad. I've been...
BETH ORTON Heaven is what we spend our lives trying to find.
BETH ORTON From the beginning, I wanted to make dance music with a human element to it.
BETH ORTON The kind of people who always go on about whether a thing is in good taste invariably have very bad ...
JOE ORTON You can have all sorts of relationships, but there's something with musicians working together w...
BETH ORTON I'd the upbringing a nun would envy and that's the truth. Until I was fifteen I was more familiar wi...
JOE ORTON Every luxury was lavished on you - atheism, breast-feeding, circumcision. I had to make my own way.
JOE ORTON It's all any reasonable child can expect if the dad is present at the conception.
JOE ORTON Throughout the game we had chances to make plays and pull away, but we just didn't do it.
KYLE ORTON I really like this young quarterback (Kyle Orton). He's very efficient. The speed of the game doesn'...
KYLE ORTON The chairman said they wanted a national policy. It's all about competition and they aren't going to...
BARRY ORTON That vote was like a rookie baseball player being called up in a losing game and hitting a triple. I...
BARRY ORTON I think the chances of the whole bill passing are at least even and maybe a little better than even....
BARRY ORTON We have a huge problem out there with police, fire and other emergency communications everywhere. Th...
BARRY ORTON Considering that date has been pushed back what, now, a dozen times, I think it's a pretty good bet ...
BARRY ORTON They just start building and say because it's IP (Internet protocol) you can't regulate it. And you'...
BARRY ORTON I think in the short run there will be a lot of deals offered out there. Some prices will be lowered...
BARRY ORTON Every community does it differently and the phone industry doesn't want that. They want to avoid loc...
BARRY ORTON Sugaring season is the season when you tap the trees for sugar that turns into maple syrup. I've...
BETH ORTON Profitability for the quarter was affected by the lower revenue and a reduction in average selling p...
DAVID ORTON It was an unfortunate situation, especially because when we got that first down I kind of felt like ...
KYLE ORTON That was a marvelous occupation and very successful,
JOHN ORTON They confused me. I played like crap.
KYLE ORTON The kind of people who always go on about whether a thing is in good taste invariably have very bad ...
JOE ORTON I'd the upbringing a nun would envy. Until I was fifteen I was more familiar with Africa than my own...
JOE ORTON Reading isn't an occupation we encourage among police officers. We try to keep the paperwork down to...
JOE ORTON When you're dropping back, you don't expect to hit someone.
KYLE ORTON Second-quarter sales results were significantly impacted by the greater- than-expected slowdown in t...
DAVID ORTON ATI has had challenges in the last couple quarters and we are obviously disappointed with our perfor...
DAVID ORTON Clearly, ATI has had challenges in the last couple of quarters.
DAVID ORTON We are pleased with our overall progress in the quarter and remain intensely focused on technology l...
DAVID ORTON I'm coming into places with some people who just want to hear what I did before, with some peopl...
BETH ORTON I used to think it was good to kind of work within your limitations.
BETH ORTON I learned to embrace my individuality, and if that meant writing a song on one chord over and over a...
BETH ORTON I don't believe in trouble. Because I think that trouble is sometimes good, sometimes bad. I'...
BETH ORTON I'd say my greatest fear is fear itself.
BETH ORTON Before you worry about what genre it is, about whether it's a loop or a drum, it's about wha...
BETH ORTON We're all like little ants who scurry around with the materials that are at hand right now. Each...
BETH ORTON That's what has made me is service. You go when the man calls. People want service.
LARRY ORTON Most companies don't want to pay drivers time on the clock to get their truck repaired, so we go to ...
LARRY ORTON We have six full-time employees and five pretty good sized trucks there. We will keep them there.
LARRY ORTON I don't have any problem with a guy getting emotional on the sideline. I get emotional too. That stu...
KYLE ORTON I'm not happy with that one. We've got to get better.
KYLE ORTON We're happy to be above .500 for the first time in a long time.
KYLE ORTON I read every chance I get, though I haven't had many chances lately. I like Brokaw. I like his persp...
KYLE ORTON Des made a great individual play on that [first] touchdown. He had a great game for us.
KYLE ORTON I think we're hitting our stride.
KYLE ORTON The only way to do it is to play. I really believe that. That's the only way you can get better. I h...
KYLE ORTON (Smith) says I'm the guy, and they're behind me. I think the offense is behind me, and (so is) the d...
KYLE ORTON If you keep your mind sufficiently open, people will throw a lot of rubbish into it.
WILLIAM A. ORTON I do still get shocked every once in a while when I catch my reflection when I'm walking past a ...
DAVE MATTHEWS Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people 'the cops.' But...
DAVE ATTELL Everyone has a breaking point, turning point, stress point, the game is permeated with it. The fans ...
DAVE WINFIELD Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
DAVE BARRY We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admi...
DAVE BARRY Instead of sailing off into the sunset, he hopes to sail into the next century.
DAVE ANDERSON For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
DAVE BARRY What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another pe...
DAVE BARRY Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
DAVE BARRY Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is ...
DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ...
DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to a...
DAVE BARRY The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
DAVE BARRY It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire.
DAVE BARRY I never excelled at one sport or had a very strong passion for anything other than wrestling and bod...
DAVE BAUTISTA A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are t...
DAVE ATTELL As an individual, I think you have to find your own path. I like the simplicity and purity of Hindui...
DAVE DAVIES I had a few brushes with death, where I nearly chose to go. The final one in 1996 did it for me. I s...
DAVE GAHAN The important thing to remember is that bugs don't actually talk.
DAVE FOLEY When people get disillusioned and get insecure and content about the future, they tend to brood abou...
DAVE DAVIES Jazz isn't dead yet. It's the underpinning of everything in this country. Whether it's a...
DAVE BRUBECK And that's actually the brunt of what we do is, people going straight from their workplace, stra...
DAVE EGGERS That's country music for you - bourbon and the Bible.
DAVE HAYWOOD So this is the space during tutoring hours. It's very busy. Same principles: one-on-one attentio...
DAVE EGGERS You can do and use the skills that you have. The schools need you. The teachers need you. Students a...
DAVE EGGERS The Left likes to think of itself as the bulwark of progressive liberal individualism, and yet it se...
DAVE BRAT Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY A standard sitcom... is a very standard idea, like these people falling in love and living with each...
DAVE FINKEL Standing out as a writer today requires more than a bright idea and limpid prose. Authors need to be...
DAVE MORRIS Empire Square production finishes in about a month's time, so at the moment, right now, I'm ...
DAVE ROWNTREE It is criminal to put our servicemen and women in harm's way and to put the lives of so many civ...
DAVE MATTHEWS We don't have enough people going into those fields and there is a high burnout rate in some hea...
DAVE OBEY Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is th...
DAVE BARRY If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.
DAVE BARRY The question is, why are politicians so eager to be president? What is it about the job that makes i...
DAVE BARRY I go to see some big shows of other bands, and I feel like I'm so bombarded and over-stimulated ...
DAVE GAHAN I'm tired of high policy talks. I want to focus on nuts and bolts.
DAVE FREUDENTHAL The thing that will never go away is that connection you make with a band or a song where you're...
DAVE GROHL I played a homosexual bodyguard in 'The Last Detective,' and that was quite a pleasure to do...
DAVE LEGENO It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY The baby boomer surge is forcing society to face decisions about costs - and particularly what is va...
DAVE DEBRONKART Granted, a long book can be as daunting as a hard one. I nearly reached for 'Game of Thrones'...
DAVE MORRIS Joy comes from places you least expect it. It's usually the simple things, like watching my son ...
DAVE GAHAN If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to...
DAVE BARRY The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or...
DAVE BARRY The waves of love roll throughout the Universe, and overflow in our hearts..
Everything is ONE!
DAVE ZEBIAN I like the relaxed way in which the Japanese approach religion. I think of myself as basically a mor...
DAVE BARRY I'm so alive.

As I stand facing the beauty of the never-ending Pacific Ocean, a late afte...
DAVE PELZER 'Breaking Bad' and 'The Shield' were planned right from the start so that their narr...
DAVE MORRIS I found there's a fairly blatant racism in America that's already there, and I don't thi...
DAVE MATTHEWS I want to make hand-held music, undiminished by the need to make everybody in the world listen at on...
DAVE SITEK We all have to die some day, if we live long enough.
DAVE FARBER We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless...
DAVE BARRY The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitutio...
DAVE BARRY There just isn’t enough cock in this world to be caught suckin’ and be called anything but a slu...
DAVE MATTHES ...you're either gonna spend your life fucking pussy, or taking it to church.
DAVE MATTHES I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.
DAVE BARRY That’s what books do. They are the building blocks, the DNA, if you will, of you. Think of everyth...
DAVE EGGERS I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and that there would be time to l...
DAVE EGGERS Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on.
DAVE BARRY It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know ...
DAVE BARRY You had me at "We'll make it look like an accident."
DAVE BARRY Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
DAVE BARRY I'd take a nerf bullet for you.
DAVE BARRY What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
DAVE BARRY The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter ...
DAVE BARRY It was not that Adam ate the apple for the apple's sake, but because it was forbidden. It would have...
DAVE BARRY I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to r...
DAVE BARRY Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
DAVE BARRY I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.
DAVE BARRY In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is ba...
DAVE BARRY Books have a unique way of stopping time in a particular moment and saying: Let’s not forget this.
DAVE EGGERS Wake up naked drinking coffee
Making plans to change the world
While the world is changing...
DAVE MATTHEWS Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see wi...
DAVE BARRY Can you imagine the reaction of a British tabloid newspaper if they found a small school in rural En...
DAVE GORMAN We have advantages. We have a cushion to fall back on. This is abundance. A luxury of place and time...
DAVE EGGERS How could I have been anyone other than me?
DAVE MATTHEWS My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I threw my amplifier out the dormit...
DAVE BARRY As a rule, software systems do not work well until they have been used, and have failed repeatedly, ...
DAVE PARNAS Don't get suckered in by the comments ... they can terribly be misleading.
DAVE STORER Giving half answers won't make the conversation half as long.
DAVE JOHNSON Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would b...
DAVE BARRY A theme is a memory aid, it helps you through the presentation just as it also provides the thread o...
DAVE CAREY What Women Want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be...
DAVE BARRY Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popula...
DAVE BARRY Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated ...
DAVE BARRY Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told.
DAVE BARRY There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who ...
DAVE BARRY The obvious and fair solution to the housework problem is to let men do the housework for, say, the ...
DAVE BARRY It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in...
DAVE BARRY In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went...
DAVE BARRY Although Golf was originally restricted to wealthy Protestants, today its open to anybody who owns h...
DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybo...
DAVE BERRY Anything done for the first time unleashes a demon.
DAVE SIM I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any ...
DAVE BARRY The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.
DAVE BARRY A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer
DAVE BARRY It is a good idea to "shop around" before you settle on a doctor. Ask about the condition of his Mer...
DAVE BARRY Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the p...
DAVE BARRY The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they...
DAVE BARRY My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible.
DAVE BARRY The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning "ability to," and bics, meaning "withst...
DAVE BARRY Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris...
DAVE BARRY The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.
DAVE BARRY The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas...
DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless y...
DAVE BARRY Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that h...
DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving infant's life, she will choose to sa...
DAVE BARRY And computers are getting smarter all the time: scientists tell us that soon they will be able to ta...
DAVE BARRY The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious pe...
DAVE BARRY Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.
DAVE BARRY New York Taxi Rules:1. Driver speaks no English.2. Driver just got here two days ago from someplace ...
DAVE BARRY Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organiza...
DAVE BARRY Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won...
DAVE BARRY Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
DAVE BARRY Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.
DAVE BARRY I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are our Hope for the Futu...
DAVE BARRY One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a compute...
DAVE BARRY If you can't excell with talent, triumph with effort.
DAVE WEINBAUM People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with th...
DAVE BARRY Our environmental problems originate in the hubris of imagining ourselves as the central nervous sys...
DAVE FOREMAN Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see wit...
DAVE BARRY We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but ...
DAVE BARRY We are not meant to know everything, Mae. Did you ever think that perhaps our minds are delicately c...
DAVE EGGERS You sit at a desk twelve hours a day and you have nothing to show for it except some numbers that wo...
DAVE EGGERS It’s not that I’m not social. I’m social enough. But the tools you guys create actually manufa...
DAVE EGGERS Even in a country like the USA where fitness has become an obsession, most people exercising do not ...
DAVE WILSON Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, usi...
DAVE BARRY We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this i...
DAVE BARRY Life's real failure is when you do not realize how close you were to success when you gave up.
DAVE CHECKETT You can't choose what you're famous for in life.
DAVE KELLETT The English language was carefully, carefully cobbled together by three blind dudes and a German dic...
DAVE KELLETT A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' comes together. It is when an imperfect couple lea...
DAVE MEURER Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris...
DAVE BARRY The future is no place to place your better days.
DAVE MATTHEWS Nothing can do what a book can do. Lifts you out of your life... to a whole new world, whole new per...
DAVE KELLETT I was trying to make the web more civil. I was trying to make it more elegant. I got rid of anonymit...
DAVE EGGERS Gang violence in America is not a sudden problem. It has been a part of urban life for years, offeri...
DAVE REICHERT It's all very boring to say that we get along great and all that and sometimes we mock up come a...
DAVE EDMUNDS