It's great to see Sassy put a smile on patients' faces and give them a light moment.

Now comes the part where I relieve you, the little people, of the burden of your failed and useless lives. But remember, as my plastic surgeon always said: if you gotta go, go with a smile.

You go through their bio with a fine-tooth comb, because candidates have a proclivity for overstating their qualifications, especially their education and their war records.

Because of all the money that was spent, it got voters more interested. If it had just been candidates who couldn't self-fund, I think turnout would have been much smaller.

They approached me to be a campaign consultant and advise them on their plans.

I'll be the first in line to sign up. It won't affect my ability to do business.