It is never seven that you count to, before you do something difficult. It is never at the count of two. It is always three, and it is strange.
Lemony Snicket
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*
'Cause life is not.
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LEMONY SNICKET There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap,...
LEMONY SNICKET I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. It is good to brush your teeth when you are angry, becau...
LEMONY SNICKET There was something I was always very good at, however, and that was teaching myself not to be frigh...
LEMONY SNICKET Scolding must be very, very fun, otherwise children would be allowed to do it. It is not because chi...
LEMONY SNICKET So you’re reluctant, I said to myself. Many, many people are reluctant. It’s like having feet. I...
LEMONY SNICKET The children of this world and the adults of this world are in entirely separate boats and only drif...
LEMONY SNICKET A mystery is solved with a story.
LEMONY SNICKET I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get ...
LEMONY SNICKET You may be right,' she said, a phrase which here meant 'I’m wrong, but I don’t have the courage ...
LEMONY SNICKET Knowing that something is wrong and doing it anyway happens very often in life, and I doubt I will e...
LEMONY SNICKET There's an easy method for finding someone when you hear them scream. First get a clean sheet of pap...
LEMONY SNICKET Don’t repeat yourself. It’s not only repetitive, it’s redundant, and people have heard it befo...
LEMONY SNICKET They say in every library there is a single book that can answer the question that burns like a fire...
LEMONY SNICKET How clever of you to figure that out,' said a voice at the top of the stairs, and Violet, and Klaus ...
LEMONY SNICKET I'm not a stranger," I said, and pointed to his book. "I'm someone who reads the same authors you do...
LEMONY SNICKET There is nothing wrong with crying at the end of a long day.
LEMONY SNICKET being skeptical is a good thing for a journalist, because it means you don't completely trust anyone...
LEMONY SNICKET There are people in the world who care about automobiles, and there are people who couldn't care les...
LEMONY SNICKET Perhaps I had been in another world before I was born, and did not remember it, or perhaps I would s...
LEMONY SNICKET There are many mysteries I have never solved, and the hair of my chaperone is perhaps my most curiou...
LEMONY SNICKET The three of us stood there for a minute. I don’t know what Stew was thinking, and the filing cabi...
LEMONY SNICKET When you need a haircut, it looks like you have no one to take care of you.
LEMONY SNICKET I don't know why wicked places generally look wicked. You'd think they'd look nice, to fool people, ...
LEMONY SNICKET They can teach you anything. That doesn't mean you learn it. It doesn't mean you believe it.
LEMONY SNICKET The trick to following someone without getting caught is to follow somebody who doesn't think they'r...
LEMONY SNICKET I thought the war was a simple matter, with one side good and the other evil. But the more I read, t...
LEMONY SNICKET Complimenting someone in an exaggerated way is known as flattery, and flattery will generally get yo...
LEMONY SNICKET Of course you can trust me," Jake Hix said. "We read the same books.
LEMONY SNICKET It is a lonely feeling when someone you care about becomes a stranger.
LEMONY SNICKET Nobody should feel pain all by themselves.
LEMONY SNICKET There are some secrets you want to keep to yourself, even if they don't matter. They might only matt...
LEMONY SNICKET It seemed to me that every adult did something terrible sooner or later. And every child, I thought,...
LEMONY SNICKET