I'll eat rabbit pellets before you get me into something pink with ruffles.

What is it about hairdressers? You tell them 'not too short' and some part of their hairdresser brain hears this as 'whack the shit out of it.' If you never say, 'not too short,' everything is fine. You say it, & it's a guarantee you'll come out ready for the military>

At the end of the first lunch, there was a group of about - I don't know how many it began as - but it escalated to about 100 students who stayed beyond the period when the lunch was to end. They started chanting 'Mexico, Mexico' and waving flags. The problem began when they exited that area and began co-mingling and being jostled by other students and some fights broke out.

You can't sit down in a bachelor's house without getting sick with cooties from the dirt and built-up grime, but you can eat off the barrel of his gun.

It's amazing what the possiblity of romance can do to you. I'm self-conscious now in ways I never was before.

The difference between men and women is this--if you catch a woman butt-naked, she tries to cover the private parts with her hands. A man will sit there just like you found him even if he doesn't have much to be proud of.