If you're not scared or angry at the thought of a human brain being controlled remotely, then it could be this prototype of mine is finally starting to work.

John Alejandro King

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The problem with those bumper stickers that warn against tailgating, is that I have to get really close to the person's car to read them.

— John Alejandro King

The man who said in 1899: Everything that can be invented has been invented - technically, wasn't he right at the time?

— John Alejandro King

Remember, anyone can juggle for a second.

— John Alejandro King

What makes you think the whole world revolves around you?! my mother said, as I slowly rotated to maintain eye contact.

— John Alejandro King

Better a consultant who tap dances, than a consultant who does the moonwalk.

— John Alejandro King