If you masturbated with your left hand, would it be like being touched by a retarded person?

What's right is what's left if you do everything else wrong.

If you shoot 20 times, you ought to score. That's what I told him. Eat with your left hand -- your right shoulder has got to be tired. That's a lot of shots.

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.

Acting is different from stand-up. It gives you this ability to enter into another character, to create another person.

With film roles, it just has to be a character either I haven't done before, or a role with somebody really interesting or with an interesting person or group of people.