If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: Pour a little Lavoris in the toilet.

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: Pour a little Lavoris in the toilet.

Yeah, don't eat dog semen. I hear it's the #1 cause of bad breath.

Did you hear about this story? ... Several Minnesota Vikings players are being investigated after a boat cruise on a lake turned into a wild sex party on this boat. ? What are they, 1-3? One and three. That's the only offensive thing they've done all season, actually.

Now, today is the day we honor, of course, the Presidents, ranging from George Washington, who couldn't tell a lie, to George Bush, who couldn't tell the truth, to Bill Clinton, who couldn't tell the difference.

Saddam Hussein also challenged President Bush to a debate. The Butcher of Baghdad vs. the Butcher of the English language.