My inspiration to do comedy came from many places. Saturday mornings, I would watch Bob Hope and Jer...
ERIK GRIFFIN New York is great because it's such a cross-section of the world, and when you're used to pe...
ERIK GRIFFIN Most of the time, the truth is ugly and in your face! My observational brand of humor is very much a...
ERIK GRIFFIN I started going to the open mics every day in 2003. You make the comics laugh, they get you work, an...
ERIK GRIFFIN People don't realize it's not just about being funny, and they don't know how perceptive...
ERIK GRIFFIN I take the good with the bad. I always wanted to be a comic, and part of that, for me, was that I wa...
ERIK GRIFFIN I love doing stand-up, and the more you do outside of stand-up to raise your profile, the better you...
ERIK GRIFFIN 'Workaholics' seems like it's doing wonders for my career.
ERIK GRIFFIN I was born and raised in Los Angeles.
ERIK GRIFFIN 'The Ugly Truth' isn't trying to change the world with strong political opinions; it'...
ERIK GRIFFIN Women are hilarious.
ERIK GRIFFIN Sometimes comedy can be, like, negative and just the worst parts of ourselves coming out.
ERIK GRIFFIN It's not like every male comic you meet is funny. Like, a lot of them are not funny.
ERIK GRIFFIN When they first start doing comedy, new comics or even people that have only been doing it three or ...
ERIK GRIFFIN I think the best compliment you can receive is not, 'Oh, that was really funny,' but, 'I...
ERIK GRIFFIN I look stupid without a mustache.
ERIK GRIFFIN We're eating Ramen Noodles chicken and beef that's what we eat everyday.
AHMAD GRIFFIN We ain't got no family out here. All the football team that's our family.
AHMAD GRIFFIN We're eating Ramen Noodles — chicken and beef â€...
AHMAD GRIFFIN We ain't got no family out here. All the football team — that's our...
AHMAD GRIFFIN I know that they are all right, I just don't know where they at.
AHMAD GRIFFIN The thing that bums me out about 'The Real World' is I don't want to believe that teenag...
KATHY GRIFFIN I believe our health care system is in drastic need of innovative, patient-centered reforms that enc...
TIM GRIFFIN He commended us on how great a win it was. That would have been a devastating loss. He didn't really...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN I felt something pop in there. I'll wait and see how it feels.
ADRIAN GRIFFIN But he can't go out on the court and play. We have to take some accountability as players.
ADRIAN GRIFFIN We got the win, it didn't matter how ugly it was. We needed to get back on track.
ADRIAN GRIFFIN Guys get hurt and other guys have got to pull their weight and pick up the slack. We don't make excu...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN We just followed the game plan. Defending those guys is just a total team effort.
ADRIAN GRIFFIN We've got excellent scorers. Why do they need me to take shots away from them? I know what I need to...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN I think that is why we came out with a lot of energy. We know he is capable of putting up big number...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN Whoever guarded him played with a lot of energy. Fortunately, he didn't get going like he usually ca...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN It starts with the coach. He gets us ready. We're very prepared. You look at our second unit, even o...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN It is Joplin, the wind is usually blowing in Joplin. You can open your window and get a pretty decen...
ADAM GRIFFIN This is the annual time of year for the air-conditioning complaint.
ADAM GRIFFIN This is the best attendance we've had in three or four years. I appreciate the work the body has don...
ADAM GRIFFIN We've had a high demand on single rooms. They are paying more for them, so we wanted to offer them m...
ADAM GRIFFIN The more I heard that I couldn't make it, the more I was determined to do it. I never liked being to...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN To me, the Heismans symbolize (how great of a team we were) because that success could not happen in...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN My name is not only Archie Griffin, it's two-time Heisman trophy winner Archie Griffin. Once you win...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN When speaking to young people, I tell them that it is important to make sure that your mind is right...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN What most people don't know is all the good things that the coach did without anybody knowing. For i...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN I was raised right — I talk about people behind their backs. It's called manners.
KATHY GRIFFIN Studios are designed to pull out all of that beautiful ambience you get from singing in a room, and ...
PATTY GRIFFIN While I am talking about private sector job creation, the cap-and-trade energy tax, Speaker Pelosi&#...
TIM GRIFFIN I am an outsider looking in, absolutely. You're not going to see me at the Academy Awards 'V...
KATHY GRIFFIN People love to talk about the old bipartisanship. But it wasn't really bipartisanship. Yeah, the...
TIM GRIFFIN We got fatigued (from the press). I think our legs started getting out of our shots and they were ri...
ANDREW GRIFFIN We had everything it took this year to get over the hump. We just didn't execute.
ANDREW GRIFFIN They probably had five fans for every fan we had. It was so loud that we couldn't communicate with e...
ANDREW GRIFFIN The second one, I thought it was going to fall.
ANDREW GRIFFIN They came out with more intensity, more energy. We didn't really show it tonight. A win is a win, bu...
ANDREW GRIFFIN What's happening now is the gap is widening, and some of the manufacturing processes [in memory] are...
ANDREW GRIFFIN I think we actually punish children out of their relationship with their bodies... we categorically ...
SUSAN GRIFFIN President Obama's policies have been categorical failures for our country.
TIM GRIFFIN President Obama's policies have been categorical failures for our country. Unemployment is over ...
TIMOTHY GRIFFIN When last I checked, you were a sorcerer, not a Jedi."
"You've seen Star Wars?"
"Seen it a...
KATE GRIFFIN We have to work harder to show distinction.
ANGELA GRIFFIN The unity, teamwork and friendships we forged will go on.
ANGELA GRIFFIN There is going to be testing and commercialization of technology that focuses on clean energy.
ANGELA GRIFFIN It's difficult to give one person an advantage over another because they were displaced by the hurri...
ANGELA GRIFFIN I am absolutely over the moon. The baby's due next June. But I haven't found out the sex of the chil...
ANGELA GRIFFIN Texas schools are opening their doors to thousands of Hurricane Katrina evacuees. We want to help th...
ANNETTE GRIFFIN Texas schools are opening their doors to thousands of Hurricane Katrina evacuees,
ANNETTE GRIFFIN We're going to have fully certified teachers that have had a background check and it's going to be d...
ANNETTE GRIFFIN We´re going to have fully certified teachers that have had a background check and i...
ANNETTE GRIFFIN Texas schools are opening their doors to thousands of Hurricane Katrina evacuees. We want to help th...
ANNETTE GRIFFIN It is important to get these children back into a stable school environment as quickly as possible.
ANNETTE GRIFFIN The beauty of Spring Training is there's always a lot of new faces. Everybody's excited and you've g...
ALFREDO GRIFFIN I am very proud to be here and to be with such a powerful group. This is my country's team. It's a p...
ALFREDO GRIFFIN I'm here because I want this to come out well and I have a lot of respect for the boys on the team. ...
ALFREDO GRIFFIN I'm not sure if the USA has ever been exposed to this type of tradition. Fans in the USA applaud but...
ALFREDO GRIFFIN Same thing they did in the regular season. Fastballs, change-ups, he's just not swinging good.
ALFREDO GRIFFIN He said he is hitting the ball right at somebody.
ALFREDO GRIFFIN Tom was like a father to me.
ALFREDO GRIFFIN It's a Latin tradition that goes way back. It's a way to pump up the players and a way for the playe...
ALFREDO GRIFFIN The great thing about celebrity culture is that they can't seem to stop themselves from displayi...
KATHY GRIFFIN When I started performing, I played acoustic music, partly because that way you don't have to wo...
PATTY GRIFFIN I have a no-apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ...
KATHY GRIFFIN I'm confused that there is a lack of faith in listening to and deciding what is a great song and...
PATTY GRIFFIN I'm going to be doing solo stuff. The idea is to do 'small' and 'off my beaten path,...
PATTY GRIFFIN A lot of celebrities, especially when you're talking about the really big ones, live in what I c...
KATHY GRIFFIN I’ve perfected the art of the fake smile. It’s not so difficult when you are completely numb.
BETHANY GRIFFIN My friend Anderson Cooper is the scion of one of America's great shipping and railroad families,...
KATHY GRIFFIN I grew up when 'Schoolhouse Rock' taught millions of American kids how a bill becomes a law.
TIM GRIFFIN There cannot be any better cross-section of America and I think the soldiers represent the best we h...
GERALD GRIFFIN There's really no rivalry with us and (Wesley Chapel), even though we're in the same county. That wa...
BRIAN GRIFFIN With those units, it may be the place for a higher-end restaurant. Being across from the Maritime Aq...
BRIAN GRIFFIN Now everything has got a seal on it.
BRIAN GRIFFIN (Nauta) actually played very well in all the games. It's really tough to fault the goalie. He played...
BRIAN GRIFFIN We are just really concerned about the impact [the insurers' moratorium] is going to have on hospita...
BRIAN GRIFFIN In fiscal year 2006, we expect to spend in excess of $29 million on community benefits, which includ...
BRIAN GRIFFIN Our plan right now is to proceed with our timetable as it was approved by the board of directors, wh...
BRIAN GRIFFIN We want to increase employee satisfaction, and it's important for us to have it as an effective recr...
BRIAN GRIFFIN For the public, we wanted to make it easier and more convenient to access health information.
BRIAN GRIFFIN This is building community by putting people on the streets. That is what makes cities work.
BRIAN GRIFFIN You should be happy to go to work every day.
BRENDA GRIFFIN I can't tell you one.
BRENDA GRIFFIN I can leave knowing that this school is operating smoothly.
BRENDA GRIFFIN When you get buy-in from everybody and you get suggestions, that is what makes a school successful.
BRENDA GRIFFIN I'm walking into what seems to be the perfect situation.
BRENDA GRIFFIN If there are a lot of calls, we do take a look at that stuff. Some people like to demonize us. In ma...
BOB GRIFFIN The operating schedule is a collective decision based on a monstrous review a couple years back.
BOB GRIFFIN She's covered all the bases wonderfully. She works well with both staffs.
BOB GRIFFIN The year we opened Appalachian was a sizable jump, somewhere around 9 percent. It's an issue at our ...
BOB GRIFFIN I would hope [students] would understand we don't arbitrarily look to raise the board rate.
BOB GRIFFIN It's a matter of the costs of doing business. We have a yearly sit-down with a dining services contr...
BOB GRIFFIN We are kicking it off next week and the plan is have it deployed by fall.
BOB GRIFFIN She has a very patron-oriented point of view.
BOB GRIFFIN Just because I was almost 62, I did not feel decrepit and felt I wasn't finished being a soldier...
GERALD GRIFFIN Las Vegas without Wayne Newton is like Disneyland without Mickey Mouse.
MERV GRIFFIN Documentaries have always inspired me in narrative filmmaking.
GRIFFIN DUNNE Everyone who is born holds dual citizenship, in the kingdom of the well and in the kingdom of the si...
SUSAN GRIFFIN In one sense I feel that my book is a one-woman argument against determinism.
SUSAN GRIFFIN I have no limits, no filter, no class, no poise. No decorum. Just fun.
KATHY GRIFFIN We've tried everything we can, and will continue to enforce the law.
CAROL GRIFFIN There are so many awesome things you can do with the board, that I'm still learning all it can do.
CAROL GRIFFIN Some people donate money; I donate time. There's never enough people to give time.
CAROL GRIFFIN I don't like to work and make money. I like to volunteer; it's more rewarding.
CAROL GRIFFIN Thirty years ago when I started, I was teaching kids how to work a cassette player. This is the futu...
CAROL GRIFFIN It's not fair that people who work, save, and pay for their cell phones are forced to fund the L...
TIM GRIFFIN It's clear (in the recorded interview) his comprehension (of English) is not that great. They had cl...
JOHNNY GRIFFIN But at the same time, never having final cut before, I really learned an interesting thing for any s...
GRIFFIN DUNNE I think we were the first picture to cut on Final Cut Pro. So we were the guinea pigs, because we go...
GRIFFIN DUNNE When I looked at it and did my homework on this issue, I concluded that a flat tax is better than a ...
TIM GRIFFIN They had no life paddles, no life vests, no personal protective equipment. They weren't familiar wit...
DAN GRIFFIN I was asked to sing with Mavis Staples on a gospel compilation called 'Oh Happy Day.' And, y...
PATTY GRIFFIN Ordinary women attempt to change our bodies to resemble a pornographic ideal. Ordinary women constru...
SUSAN GRIFFIN The men who still have the largest share of the power in society don't do any domestic work. The ver...
SUSAN GRIFFIN Just as the slave master required the slaves to imitate the image he had of them, so women, who live...
SUSAN GRIFFIN What is buried in the past of one generation falls to the next to claim.
SUSAN GRIFFIN A story is told as much by silence as by speech.
SUSAN GRIFFIN Philosophy means nothing unless it is connected to birth, death, and the continuance of life. Anytim...
SUSAN GRIFFIN We known ourselves to be made from this earth.We know this earth is made from our bodies.For we see ...
SUSAN GRIFFIN We're supposed to be a team, ... Team chemistry this year, baby.
MICHAEL GRIFFIN It is entirely appropriate for the administration to announce or espouse whatever political views th...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN It's occurred to me I need to laugh at myself more, and that I don't need to be some sad fol...
PATTY GRIFFIN We're limited by recklessness. You must reach a standard where the conduct is wanton, inconsiderate ...
ED GRIFFIN The legislation passed by Congress reflects the U.S. government's continuing commitment to nonprolif...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN God as 'He,' as a patriarchal thing, is offensive to me. It's standard fare for America,...
PATTY GRIFFIN If you see me on Friday, you'll see different material on Saturday night.
KATHY GRIFFIN I'm sure (the Hayats) are disappointed, ... They really wanted their day in court to clear their nam...
JOHNNY GRIFFIN Much of what was said was initially said by the cooperating witness, ... It was leading questions.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN What this proves is that the government is not prepared to try this case, plain and simple.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN Roane County lost a very good man in Tony Mason. He touched a lot of lives. I don't think I know any...
JOHNNY GRIFFIN If Wildcat could not get information for the FBI, Wildcat would not be paid.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN When I signed here, all I ever heard was I was overpaid, that I was an underachiever,
CORNELIUS GRIFFIN He knew his son was being held and he believed they would let him and his son go if he cooperated.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN They're rare as hens teeth and quite valuable, ... But we prefer to think of it as rare, and not the...
JOHN GRIFFIN Currently, the Pegasus Pipeline runs through about 13 miles of the Lake Maumelle watershed and also ...
TIM GRIFFIN He reached in my car, unlocked the door, ripped me out of the car and he actually threw me on the gr...
ROBERT GRIFFIN We believe this venture safer and more affordable than any other spaceflight ventures that the U.S. ...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN I hate it, it is tedious... when I write for my act, it is very improvisational, I write bullet poin...
KATHY GRIFFIN Discussions on the San Antonio project are ongoing, and we are very optimistic.
JOHN GRIFFIN So when the penguin takes a step, its center of mass is low, so when he stops coming up over his leg...
TIM GRIFFIN We're eating Ramen Noodles — chicken and beef — that's what we eat everyday.
AHMAD GRIFFIN We ain't got no family out here. All the football team — that's our family.
AHMAD GRIFFIN I have to tell you, though, the sexism in late night talk is so profound.
KATHY GRIFFIN We are largely deferring utilization (of the station) and we are paring logistics (flights) to the b...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN It is exactly the type of enterprise which should be left to industry and the [commercial] marketpla...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN It's interesting to note that John Kerry refused to debate John Edwards one-on-one during the Democr...
TAYLOR GRIFFIN The Bush-Cheney campaign looks for a vigorous debate at the appropriate time. But John Kerry should ...
TAYLOR GRIFFIN Wash your fresh fruits and vegetables before you eat them. Peel your fruits and cut out any parts th...
PATRICIA GRIFFIN Right now, we're still addressing what the implications are on the shuttle launch schedule, and if I...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN Right now, we're still addressing what the implications are on the shuttle launch schedule. If I don...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN Obviously, we've been beaten up pretty well.
MICHAEL GRIFFIN We're going to try as hard as we can to get back in space this year because we have a big constructi...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN This time, it was Michoud's turn to take a bullet for the team,
MICHAEL GRIFFIN Right now, we're still addressing what the implications are on the shuttle launch schedule, and if I...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN My heart goes out to all the people affected by this hurricane, ... I will be visiting Stennis and t...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN I will be visiting Stennis and the Michoud Assembly Facility soon to talk with our people.
MICHAEL GRIFFIN The reality is that from an investigative standpoint, we may have (seized) firearms that are not pro...
DAVID GRIFFIN I am honored to perform with Joe Negri and the Slippery Rock Chamber Choir this Saturday. He is such...
RYAN GRIFFIN That's where the seed was planted,
ARCHIE GRIFFIN That's where the seed was planted. Some of the alumni said, 'Wouldn't it be great if Ohio State play...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN We're going to continue to put a lot on them mentally and see how they absorb it and how they react ...
MATT GRIFFIN I spent the day with the pigeons, on a bench in Trafalgar Square, my bag of belongings huddled to my...
KATE GRIFFIN Masculinity is a terrible problem, as we construe it and shape it.
SUSAN GRIFFIN It was pitch black out there so I got the family together and said a prayer, ... We decided to leave...
BARBARA GRIFFIN Luckily one of us came to our senses.
BARBARA GRIFFIN We were well prepared for the storm,
BARBARA GRIFFIN The first day passed, and the storm was not so bad. Tuesday we stayed. And Wednesday we swam our way...
BARBARA GRIFFIN I didn't want to leave Sunday,
BARBARA GRIFFIN I do hope it will turn out really nice for the guys.
BARBARA GRIFFIN We´re going to have fully certified teachers that have had a background check and it´s going to be...
ANNETTE GRIFFIN I love Mariah Carey. Remember the breakdown? I loved the breakdown.
KATHY GRIFFIN We couldn't get a play called in the defensive huddle either. We're going, 'What? What?' But that's ...
CORNELIUS GRIFFIN Usually wheat germ comes in tablets, but you want the oil. That's one little secret, especially for ...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN One of the biggest things a lot of people around here do - one of the celebrities turned me on to it...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN We need about four or five days of really good weather and good winds.
ANTHONY GRIFFIN This decision comes as a welcome relief for the families who were ostracized and harassed because th...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN If Katrina did anything, it woke people up to the power of Mother Nature. When Katrina hit this coun...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN If Katrina did anything, it woke people up to the power of Mother Nature.
ANTHONY GRIFFIN That's where the seed was planted, ... Some of the alumni said, 'Wouldn't it be great if Ohio State ...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN These students are truly in a league of their own. Each student nominated for the award has gone abo...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN It wasn't really discussed, but it's the kind of game you'd think TV would jump on with both feet,
ARCHIE GRIFFIN The main way he reminds me of coach Hayes is that he cares about people.
ARCHIE GRIFFIN The Buckeyes must always be ready for a challenge and must always be ready to get up after being kno...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN It's a real possibility. I think someone will win it two years in a row. I've said it since I won it...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN In the face of adversity, you find out if you're a fighter or a quitter. It's all about getting up a...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN