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I'm not a movie guy, I'm not a TV sitcom guy, but whatever seems to fit and is funny is good for me.


Dave Attell

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I don't watch television. I'm not a TV guy.
GARY LOCKWOOD I'm not a big TV watcher guy; I like being outside.
BILLY MAGNUSSEN I'm a guy, but I'm not afraid to cry. Not all of the time. But when I'm watching a movie...
ZAC EFRON I'm an unorthodox type of guy, a funny guy - at least I think I'm funny. And one of the thin...
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL I'm not a 'Steel Magnolias' kind of girl. I'm kind of like a guy. My favorite movie ...
LESLIE BIBB You have to understand that I'm not just some guy who voices characters in animated movie and TV...
JACK MCBRAYER I'm not a big guy. I'm not a menacing guy. I'm not an intimidating guy. I may look that ...
DAVE BAUTISTA I'm not a big radio guy, I don't listen to whatever is the hip new thing.
DUSTIN DIAMOND I'm a pretty funny guy, and I would love to do a comedy with a bunch of funny guys - movie-star ...
LEBRON JAMES I'm not a secretive guy. I'm talkative.
DAVID LAGERCRANTZ I'm a normal guy. I'm not a chef.
AL ROKER But I'm not a tough guy or a street fighter for real. I'm just an actor.
CHANNING TATUM I've always been a guy that's liked a crowd and having people around cheering for me. I'...
MATT KUCHAR I'm not a joke guy; I'm not a stand-up comic.
EUGENE LEVY I'm not just a normal guy. I'm a gymnast.
ACTION BRONSON I am a guy who is first of all a businessman. I'm not a stunt man. I'm not a daredevil. I...
EVEL KNIEVEL I'd been offered TV series over the years and never had any interest in doing television. I'...
EDWARD BURNS When I came out to Hollywood in 1985, I thought that I would be sitcom star. I'm a tall, skinny,...
DOUG JONES I'd like to say that I'm a rock star, but I'm not - I'm honestly more of a relations...
ED SHEERAN I've got a sense of humor. I'm a funny guy.
DARYL HALL I probably prefer comedy. Why? I'm not sure. I feel like the energy of a comedy is a better fit ...
CAMERON MATHISON Journalism is my first love. But music comes in a close second. What's important for me is that ...
LESTER HOLT I'm old school. I'm not the fastest guy or the quickest guy.
JAMES HARDEN I'm not a huge scary movie kind of guy; like, I don't do slasher movies, because I'm rea...
BRENDAN ROBINSON I've been using the same hair wax for as long as I can remember. I'm not a gel guy, I'm ...
GUY FIERI I don't think I would do a straight late-night talk show, like a 'Tonight Show' kind of ...
ERIC ANDRE I'm a movie guy - I can get lost in anything.
CHASKE SPENCER When you see Robert Englund in a movie, you think he is the bad guy, but if I'm not the bad guy,...
ROBERT ENGLUND I'm not saying I'm a family guy, but maybe that's what people see in me: some kind of pa...
JOEL EDGERTON I may not look it when I'm playing, but I think I'm a fun guy to hang with when I'm rela...
DAVID DUVAL I had given thought to acting, but I never really had a good enough opportunity or a character who m...
GUCCI MANE I'm a humble guy, but I'm audacious.
ANDY GRAMMER I'm really not a TV junkie... OK, I kind of am a TV junkie, but I'm much more of a movie jun...
ALISON BRIE People always say, 'How is it to be so successful?' I'm not successful yet. Richard Bran...
AFROJACK I'm always just waiting for someone to cut me off; I'm a chatty guy.
DARREN CRISS I am not a famous person at home - I'm just a guy here. I'm a father, I'm a companion, I...
WILLIAM HURT I'm never going to apologize for having a lot of guy friends, and I always have. That happens, a...
CAMILLA BELLE To the U.S. and the world, I'm just known as some funny song and some funny music, some funny vi...
PSY I'm not really a Spider-Man fan. I'm more of a Batman guy.
DENIS LEARY I'm not a vindictive kind of guy.
ADAM WEST It's so funny, I've done so many projects where I've been interrogated. I guest starred ...
AARON PAUL I'm not a Starbucks guy. I'm a Dunkin Donuts guy, but I like to pay for the coffee of the ot...
ROBERT KRAFT I think of myself as a funny guy but nobody thinks I'm funnier than my daughters.
JERRY O'CONNELL I'm really a cool, mellow guy. I'm not as crazy as everybody thinks.
TOMMY LEE I am not racked with self-loathing. Some issues of guilt and shame, but I'm a pretty good guy.
MARCUS BRIGSTOCKE Me, I'm an encyclopedia. I'm not a very smart guy, but I'm an encyclopedia. You can ask ...
JOSE ANDRES I'm not a real big text guy. I'm not really into this new age stuff. I don't twit or twe...
JEFF FISHER I love jazz music and sad music. I'm a sentimental guy. I'm a romantic guy.
FRED DURST I'm not a big guy for research. You've got to take a risk.
ANDREW SCOTT I'm an eccentric, silly, observational guy, but I'm not gonna frighten off social conservati...
JIM GAFFIGAN It's funny: people who meet me say, 'I thought you'd be different.' But I'm stil...
BILL ENGVALL I'm not the guy who does slo-mo, or I'm not the guy who does splashing rain or doves flying ...
DUNCAN JONES I'm not an easygoing guy as a director.
TED KOTCHEFF I'm not always a smiley kind of guy.
BERNIE SANDERS I'm not really a current events guy, sadly.
ERIK GRIFFIN I'm a movie maker, but I have the same feelings as the average guy out there.
CLINT EASTWOOD For me, I skate as masculine as I can. I'm not a big strong guy. I'm not interested in fight...
JOHNNY WEIR Dave is a really smart guy. [But] this was not a good thing for him to do.
BRIAN RUST I'll tell ya, I'm a genuinely nice guy. I really am. A real nice guy. But I think I'm te...
LOU REED I don't think I'm a singer, I think I'm an expressionist. But it takes time to put it in...
BENJAMIN CLEMENTINE I'm quite sarcastic, and I'm funny, but not kind of funny. It's a weird funny, and some ...
MILLIE BOBBY BROWN I'm not a big-company guy. I need freedom and control.
EVAN WILLIAMS Maybe I'm delusional but I'm usually funny. It's not 100% but I have a pretty good batti...
ADAM CAROLLA I do a lot of serious stuff, but I'm not a very serious guy.
BRUCE GREENWOOD I'm a guy who is easy to get along with, and I'll put up with a lot of things. But not disho...
SCOTTIE PIPPEN I'm the bad guy on the rest of Jennifer Love Hewitt's 'The Client List,' I'm the...
JOHNATHON SCHAECH I'm not really a zombie genre guy; I'm not particularly versed in it. Doing 'The Walking...
NOAH EMMERICH I'm not a guy that sits around and does nothing.
DUSTY BAKER Are there any good guys on 'Prison Break?' I suppose there might be. I can't honestly sa...
CHRIS VANCE I got into television, and I'm a television guy, so I've never really had a movie career.
ED O'NEILL I'm not a real Halloween kind of guy, because Halloween is every day.
AL JOURGENSEN I'm a 50 year-old guy and I'm not in shape like I was when I was 30.
RICHARD GERE I'm not a computer guy. I'm like an anthropologist. I'm fascinated with people's obs...
WILLIAM GIBSON Every day is work for me, but it's also a party. I'm the luckiest guy in the world.
DIPLO I don't really necessarily think I'm a funny guy, but I like the opportunity to take on some...
SEANN WILLIAM SCOTT I'm not a guy that's going to brag or feel like I'm better than the group.
KEVIN DURANT I'm a big boy, and I'm a tough guy.
KEN HARRELSON I'm not just coming here for a payday. I'm not an old guy at the end of my career looking fo...
LIAM SMITH Do I have a small movie in me? Yeah, probably, when I'm 60. But I'm not Hal Ashby, I'm n...
BRETT RATNER I know I'm not the biggest guy or the fastest guy, but you've got to bring something to the ...
STEFON DIGGS I'm 5 foot 7, and I've got pasty white skin. I don't think I'm ugly, don't get m...
JAMES MCAVOY To be totally honest? I don't know if I'll keep doing more impressions. People told me I had...
BILL HADER I'm not trying to fit in with nobody. I'm just me.
BRYCE HARPER I'm not trying to be a celebrity, Justin Timberlake kinda guy.
CALVIN HARRIS I'm 42 and the age of a guy who has kids, so I guess I'm playing right where I'm suppose...
EDDIE MURPHY I'm not a media darling. I'm forever the outsider, for whatever the reason is.
RUSSELL PETERS I'm not exactly a guy who makes new friends easily.
TOM PETTY I'm not painting myself as a down-home, modest guy.
COLIN FARRELL I'm from New York, I'm 53, I have my moments when I'm a nice guy, and more frequently I ...
JOHN SCHNEIDER Believe it or not, I've got a really bad metabolism. One burger and I'm done. I'm not a ...
GABRIEL IGLESIAS I would like to perform more in English. But there have to be many good things gathered for me to be...
LUDIVINE SAGNIER I'm a product of good nutrition, cutting edge supplementation and hard training, and I'm an ...
WARREN CUCCURULLO It's good to know people think I'm a nice guy.
XAVIER BECERRA I'm not a big guy anyway. I'm only, what, 150 pounds? I was 190 for 'Batman,' 179 fo...
TOM HARDY Very rarely do I talk off the top of my head on stage. I'm not an improv guy. I'm a writer-g...
STEVEN WRIGHT I like mellow music. I like some jazz. But I'm not a big hard rock guy.
GARY CARTER I have been doing so much. Speaking engagements... producing... developing a half-hour sitcom... wor...
TASHA SMITH I'm the worst rider. I'm a terrible rider. Me and horses are not a good mix. For some reason...
DANA DELANY Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjo...
CHRIS ROCK When a guy tells me I'm cute, it's not something desirable. Cute is more like what you want ...
NATALIE PORTMAN

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DAVE ATTELL A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are t...
DAVE ATTELL When I was a kid, I really loved Indians. Native Americans. Pardon. Me.
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DAVE ATTELL Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people ""the cops."" But you k...
DAVE ATTELL Doesn't matter what you say or do; people can always find a way to call you a dick.
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DAVE ATTELL You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they...
DAVE ATTELL I don't mind a crowd's not laughing; it's the groans that slow down the show.
DAVE ATTELL What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you s...
DAVE ATTELL I have soundtracks for a lot of stuff.
DAVE ATTELL I feel like soundtrack music is almost like seeing the movie again, but with my ears.
DAVE ATTELL I'm a stand-up comic. Anything else I do besides that is a plus, but stand-up comedy is what I d...
DAVE ATTELL I found a gray hair one of my testicles the today. No, it wasn't mine, but it's frightening.
DAVE ATTELL I found a gray hair on one of my testicles today. No, it wasn't mine, but it's frightening.
DAVE ATTELL For a long time the people at my shows were sort of the Pantera-tattoo trucker guys, really cool dud...
DAVE ATTELL I keep getting these people at my shows who only know me from television. I can always tell when the...
DAVE ATTELL I have no grand scheme.
DAVE ATTELL I never wanted to be famous.
DAVE ATTELL I'm not like a performer type.
DAVE ATTELL I don't think I'm a star or a celebrity or any thing like that.
DAVE ATTELL I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials.
DAVE ATTELL I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes.
DAVE ATTELL Once you get offstage you're just like everyone else, and everyone else can get into a fight.
DAVE ATTELL I don't watch reality TV. I'm cool.
DAVE ATTELL My day jobs... I knew I was bad at those, so I didn't really have the confidence to think that I...
DAVE ATTELL I get recognized, but I'm not really a famous famous.
DAVE ATTELL Being on the road is kind of lonely.
DAVE ATTELL Doesn't matter what you say or do; people can always find a way to call you a dick.
DAVE ATTELL I have an imagination because my life is so boring that my imagination lets me get off the reality o...
DAVE ATTELL I do still get shocked every once in a while when I catch my reflection when I'm walking past a ...
DAVE MATTHEWS Everyone has a breaking point, turning point, stress point, the game is permeated with it. The fans ...
DAVE WINFIELD Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
DAVE BARRY We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admi...
DAVE BARRY Instead of sailing off into the sunset, he hopes to sail into the next century.
DAVE ANDERSON For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
DAVE BARRY What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another pe...
DAVE BARRY Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
DAVE BARRY Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is ...
DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ...
DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to a...
DAVE BARRY The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
DAVE BARRY It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire.
DAVE BARRY I never excelled at one sport or had a very strong passion for anything other than wrestling and bod...
DAVE BAUTISTA As an individual, I think you have to find your own path. I like the simplicity and purity of Hindui...
DAVE DAVIES I had a few brushes with death, where I nearly chose to go. The final one in 1996 did it for me. I s...
DAVE GAHAN The important thing to remember is that bugs don't actually talk.
DAVE FOLEY When people get disillusioned and get insecure and content about the future, they tend to brood abou...
DAVE DAVIES Jazz isn't dead yet. It's the underpinning of everything in this country. Whether it's a...
DAVE BRUBECK And that's actually the brunt of what we do is, people going straight from their workplace, stra...
DAVE EGGERS That's country music for you - bourbon and the Bible.
DAVE HAYWOOD So this is the space during tutoring hours. It's very busy. Same principles: one-on-one attentio...
DAVE EGGERS You can do and use the skills that you have. The schools need you. The teachers need you. Students a...
DAVE EGGERS The Left likes to think of itself as the bulwark of progressive liberal individualism, and yet it se...
DAVE BRAT Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY A standard sitcom... is a very standard idea, like these people falling in love and living with each...
DAVE FINKEL Standing out as a writer today requires more than a bright idea and limpid prose. Authors need to be...
DAVE MORRIS Empire Square production finishes in about a month's time, so at the moment, right now, I'm ...
DAVE ROWNTREE It is criminal to put our servicemen and women in harm's way and to put the lives of so many civ...
DAVE MATTHEWS We don't have enough people going into those fields and there is a high burnout rate in some hea...
DAVE OBEY Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is th...
DAVE BARRY If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.
DAVE BARRY The question is, why are politicians so eager to be president? What is it about the job that makes i...
DAVE BARRY I go to see some big shows of other bands, and I feel like I'm so bombarded and over-stimulated ...
DAVE GAHAN I'm tired of high policy talks. I want to focus on nuts and bolts.
DAVE FREUDENTHAL The thing that will never go away is that connection you make with a band or a song where you're...
DAVE GROHL I played a homosexual bodyguard in 'The Last Detective,' and that was quite a pleasure to do...
DAVE LEGENO It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY The baby boomer surge is forcing society to face decisions about costs - and particularly what is va...
DAVE DEBRONKART Granted, a long book can be as daunting as a hard one. I nearly reached for 'Game of Thrones'...
DAVE MORRIS Joy comes from places you least expect it. It's usually the simple things, like watching my son ...
DAVE GAHAN If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to...
DAVE BARRY The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or...
DAVE BARRY The waves of love roll throughout the Universe, and overflow in our hearts..
Everything is ONE!
DAVE ZEBIAN I like the relaxed way in which the Japanese approach religion. I think of myself as basically a mor...
DAVE BARRY I'm so alive.

As I stand facing the beauty of the never-ending Pacific Ocean, a late afte...
DAVE PELZER 'Breaking Bad' and 'The Shield' were planned right from the start so that their narr...
DAVE MORRIS I found there's a fairly blatant racism in America that's already there, and I don't thi...
DAVE MATTHEWS I want to make hand-held music, undiminished by the need to make everybody in the world listen at on...
DAVE SITEK We all have to die some day, if we live long enough.
DAVE FARBER We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless...
DAVE BARRY The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitutio...
DAVE BARRY There just isn’t enough cock in this world to be caught suckin’ and be called anything but a slu...
DAVE MATTHES ...you're either gonna spend your life fucking pussy, or taking it to church.
DAVE MATTHES I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.
DAVE BARRY That’s what books do. They are the building blocks, the DNA, if you will, of you. Think of everyth...
DAVE EGGERS I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and that there would be time to l...
DAVE EGGERS Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on.
DAVE BARRY It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know ...
DAVE BARRY You had me at "We'll make it look like an accident."
DAVE BARRY Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
DAVE BARRY I'd take a nerf bullet for you.
DAVE BARRY What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
DAVE BARRY The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter ...
DAVE BARRY It was not that Adam ate the apple for the apple's sake, but because it was forbidden. It would have...
DAVE BARRY I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to r...
DAVE BARRY Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
DAVE BARRY I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.
DAVE BARRY In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is ba...
DAVE BARRY Books have a unique way of stopping time in a particular moment and saying: Let’s not forget this.
DAVE EGGERS Wake up naked drinking coffee
Making plans to change the world
While the world is changing...
DAVE MATTHEWS Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see wi...
DAVE BARRY Can you imagine the reaction of a British tabloid newspaper if they found a small school in rural En...
DAVE GORMAN We have advantages. We have a cushion to fall back on. This is abundance. A luxury of place and time...
DAVE EGGERS How could I have been anyone other than me?
DAVE MATTHEWS My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I threw my amplifier out the dormit...
DAVE BARRY As a rule, software systems do not work well until they have been used, and have failed repeatedly, ...
DAVE PARNAS Don't get suckered in by the comments ... they can terribly be misleading.
DAVE STORER Giving half answers won't make the conversation half as long.
DAVE JOHNSON Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would b...
DAVE BARRY A theme is a memory aid, it helps you through the presentation just as it also provides the thread o...
DAVE CAREY What Women Want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be...
DAVE BARRY Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popula...
DAVE BARRY Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated ...
DAVE BARRY Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told.
DAVE BARRY There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who ...
DAVE BARRY The obvious and fair solution to the housework problem is to let men do the housework for, say, the ...
DAVE BARRY It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in...
DAVE BARRY In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went...
DAVE BARRY Although Golf was originally restricted to wealthy Protestants, today its open to anybody who owns h...
DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybo...
DAVE BERRY Anything done for the first time unleashes a demon.
DAVE SIM I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any ...
DAVE BARRY The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.
DAVE BARRY A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer
DAVE BARRY It is a good idea to "shop around" before you settle on a doctor. Ask about the condition of his Mer...
DAVE BARRY Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the p...
DAVE BARRY The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they...
DAVE BARRY My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible.
DAVE BARRY The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning "ability to," and bics, meaning "withst...
DAVE BARRY Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris...
DAVE BARRY The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.
DAVE BARRY The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas...
DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless y...
DAVE BARRY Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that h...
DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving infant's life, she will choose to sa...
DAVE BARRY And computers are getting smarter all the time: scientists tell us that soon they will be able to ta...
DAVE BARRY The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious pe...
DAVE BARRY Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.
DAVE BARRY New York Taxi Rules:1. Driver speaks no English.2. Driver just got here two days ago from someplace ...
DAVE BARRY Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organiza...
DAVE BARRY Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won...
DAVE BARRY Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
DAVE BARRY Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.
DAVE BARRY I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are our Hope for the Futu...
DAVE BARRY One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a compute...
DAVE BARRY If you can't excell with talent, triumph with effort.
DAVE WEINBAUM People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with th...
DAVE BARRY Our environmental problems originate in the hubris of imagining ourselves as the central nervous sys...
DAVE FOREMAN Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see wit...
DAVE BARRY We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but ...
DAVE BARRY We are not meant to know everything, Mae. Did you ever think that perhaps our minds are delicately c...
DAVE EGGERS You sit at a desk twelve hours a day and you have nothing to show for it except some numbers that wo...
DAVE EGGERS It’s not that I’m not social. I’m social enough. But the tools you guys create actually manufa...
DAVE EGGERS Even in a country like the USA where fitness has become an obsession, most people exercising do not ...
DAVE WILSON Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, usi...
DAVE BARRY We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this i...
DAVE BARRY Life's real failure is when you do not realize how close you were to success when you gave up.
DAVE CHECKETT You can't choose what you're famous for in life.
DAVE KELLETT The English language was carefully, carefully cobbled together by three blind dudes and a German dic...
DAVE KELLETT A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' comes together. It is when an imperfect couple lea...
DAVE MEURER Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris...
DAVE BARRY The future is no place to place your better days.
DAVE MATTHEWS Nothing can do what a book can do. Lifts you out of your life... to a whole new world, whole new per...
DAVE KELLETT I was trying to make the web more civil. I was trying to make it more elegant. I got rid of anonymit...
DAVE EGGERS Gang violence in America is not a sudden problem. It has been a part of urban life for years, offeri...
DAVE REICHERT It's all very boring to say that we get along great and all that and sometimes we mock up come a...
DAVE EDMUNDS To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.
DAVE BARRY American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, includi...
DAVE BARRY Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television witho...
DAVE BARRY In terms of personalities - I don't care about the personalities, I want leadership that's i...
DAVE BRAT I became a war hero before going on to critical acclaim as a professional victim.
DAVE PELZER Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.
DAVE BARRY When you please others in hopes of being accepted, you lose you self-worth in the process.
DAVE PELZER Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who re...
DAVE BARRY I work 338 days a year, 16 hours a day.
DAVE PELZER At a family's most difficult time, I want to make sure at a minimum that they have the very basi...
DAVE REICHERT It's tough to go to sleep at night, and I wake up after five hours because I feel like I'm w...
DAVE GROHL I taught myself how to play the guitar, I taught myself how to play the drums, and I kind of fake do...
DAVE GROHL There's poetry in being the band that can sell out Wembley but also makes a record in a garage. ...
DAVE GROHL My mother was a public school teacher in Virginia, and we didn't have any money, we just survive...
DAVE GROHL Through Kurt I saw the beauty of minimalism and the importance of music that's stripped down.
DAVE GROHL Singing into a microphone and learning to play an instrument - learning to do your craft - that'...
DAVE GROHL My songwriting is like extending a hand to the listener.
DAVE GROHL I stopped doing drugs when I was 20. I was finished with drugs before Nirvana even started.
DAVE GROHL In this day and age, when you can use a machine or computer to simulate or emulate what people can d...
DAVE GROHL I've experienced great things, I've experienced great tragedies. I've done almost everyt...
DAVE GROHL Wow, I get to wake up again? Ok. You have to make good with what you've got.
DAVE GROHL I think people should feel encouraged to be themselves.
DAVE GROHL When you're young, you're not afraid of what comes next. You're excited by it.
DAVE GROHL Your personal history is a part of what happens with your hands and your head as you play music.
DAVE GROHL When there's so much left to do, why spend your time focusing on things you've already done,...
DAVE GROHL There's always gonna be rock n' roll bands, there's always gonna be kids that love rock ...
DAVE GROHL If there's one thing I'm good at, it's gathering people together to do something fun.
DAVE GROHL Guilt is cancer. Guilt will confine you, torture you, destroy you as an artist. It's a black wal...
DAVE GROHL