I'm not a comic. I'm a humorist.

I'm not a comic. I'm a humorist.

Hell hath no fury like a liberal scorned

When you have a good mother and no father, God kind of sits in. It's not enough, but it helps.

We used to root for the Indians against the cavalry, because we didn't think it was fair in the history books that when the cavalry won it was a great victory, and when the Indians won it was a massacre.

Race baiters and discriminators may go underground, but they never move out of town.