I think the more rational explanation is that the excision of a five-to-six-foot leech from the surface of a human body means that that body is going to have more of its own blood in its own veins. Unless the leech finds another body, it is going to go hungry.
Dave Sim
Related Even after the dehadhyas (the belief that 'I am the body') has gone, people will say, "I saw you eat... DADA BHAGWAN Love is blind, and a deaf-mute too. PATRICK ROTHFUSS The human body is a machine which winds its own springs. JULIEN OFFROY DE LA METTRIE I believe that there is a Matrix and... to be more accurate I am in the Pornography Matrix. DEYTH BANGER It is fatal for any body of workers to have forever hanging from the fringes of its skirts other bod... FLORENCE KELLEY Empathy is the new measurement of everything. It doesn't matter what religion you have, what God you... C. JOYBELL C. The absolute yearning of one human body for another particular body and its indifference to substitu... IRIS MURDOCH There are 11 criteria for lupus that show you have inflammation in three or more body systems. An an... BARBARA HASTINGS I'm fucking the grave, I thought, I'm bringing the dead back to life... CHARLES BUKOWSKI But if one observes, one will see that the body has its own intelligence; it requires a great deal o... JIDDU KRISHNAMURTI Food Allergies Are Not Due to Food, Rather Are Due to the Constant Contamination of That Food That Y... THEHEALTHFOODGURU In a democracy, we expect the government to be tight-fit, transparent outfit that sticks to the body... JONATHAN CHEN Philosophy means nothing unless it is connected to birth, death, and the continuance of life. Anytim... SUSAN GRIFFIN The absolute yearning of one human body for another particular body and its indifference to substitu... IRIS MURDOCH Each time, storytellers clothed the naked body of the myth in their own traditions, so that listener... JOAN D. VINGE The human body is a strange & unreligious being,for it thrives on variety. DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) PEACE IS THE OBJECTIVE TO WAR, BUT THE BLOOD RUNNETH STILL NATALIE URQUIETA Life is not a game. Still, in this life, we choose the games we live to play. J.R. RIM His life seemed like a deck of cards, and in the midst of all those two’s and three’s someone ha... TEKOA MANNING How should I know?" said Alice, surprised at her own courage. "It's no business of mine." The Q... LEWIS CARROLL The unfortunate thing is that, sometimes, we slip, but, fortunately, consciously or unconsciously, w... ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH The Biggest Threat to our Democracy, Freedoms and Future is Leadership that fosters and Appeases the... MICHAEL HARRIS Wake up to a brand new day and realize why you woke up to meet the day! Live to the end of another d... ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH I don't know if I have a favorite color. KATE MIDDLETON It's very special having a new little girl. KATE MIDDLETON The love you get, is equal to the love you give. BEN OAK All believers are members of the same body and should be viewed and treated that way. HENRY HON Body. Love your body whatever the weighing scale is telling you. It has a feeling on its own, it pro... JOHN B. BEJO Body acceptance means, as much as possible, approving of and loving your body, despite its “imperf... GOLDA PORETSKY All we actually have is our body and its muscles that allow us to be under our own power. ALLEGRA KENT I am often asked how it is that I am able to value people to such a deep degree. Apparently, I exhib... C. JOYBELL C. After thirty, a body has a mind of its own. BETTE MIDLER After 30, a body has a mind of its own. BETTE MIDLER Dehadhyas (the belief that ‘I am the body’) is to continue believing you are someone that you re... DADA BHAGWAN We use our minds not to discover facts but to hide them. One of things the screen hides most effecti... ANTóNIO R. DAMáSIO If my hand on yours trembles it's because bodies never lie. MARTY RUBIN The most important things are the hardest to say, because words diminish them. STEPHEN KING Thomas Merton, another solitary, understood that. The beginning of freedom, he wrote, is not liberat... GEORGE SHEEHAN The scientific method gives us
information by testing and repeating observable things so that we
can... LEWIS N. ROE You must save what you can of your life; you musn't lose it all simply because you've lost a part. HENRY JAMES I am thinking about the past, I am living in the past but my body is in the present. Where am I? I m... EPHDAN The body politic, as well as the human body, begins to die as soon as it is born, and carries itself... JEAN JACQUES ROUSSEAU Mother Superior jump the gun... -The Beatles, Happiness is a Warm Gun LAUREN MYRACLE In some things, the body really does have a mind of its own, and weight is one of those things. Some... MELINDA JOHNSON A leech that will not quit the skin until sated with blood. THOMAS HOOD It is another piece of information that on its own means nothing. DR. GAL IFERGAN Every body continues in its state of rest, or of uniform motion in a right line, unless it is compel... SIR ISAAC NEWTON How do you know if something is real? That’s easy. Does it change you? Does it form you? Does it g... C. JOYBELL C. It is not her body that he wants but it is only through her body that he can take possession of anot... JOYCE CAROL OATES The more I work with the body, keeping my assumptions in a temporary state of reservation, the more ... THOMAS ARNOLD MINDELL The more I work with the body, keeping my assumptions in a temporary state of reservation, the more ... GEORGE MACDONALD I do not want to go into its physical reasons: the construction of the human body is different from ... MORARJI DESAI Our body has this defect that, the more it is provided care and comforts, the more needs and desires... SAINT TERESA OF AVILA To have the cognitive abilities to do research and development is vital to a forever expanding world... GARY F EVANS... Life is weird and wonderful like that, is it not. SONYA.E.WILLIAMS Being present is being connected to All Things. S. KELLEY HARRELL, M. DIV. Of course, sodium is a vital constituent of the human body. Our tissues swim in a salty sea The more... JANE BRODY On the 'Celestial Seasonings' green tea packet there is a short explanation of its benefits: 'Green ... SLAVOJ ŽIžEK A great future starts with what you can see SOTONYE ANGA The secret of my success is my hairspray. RICHARD GERE All I ever did to that apartment was hang fifty yards of yellow theatrical silk across the bedroom w... JOAN DIDION We can never make proper goodbyes. It was your last ride in a Checker cab and you had no warning. It... COLSON WHITEHEAD It's all to do with the training: you can do a lot if you're properly trained. QUEEN ELIZABETH II Like all best families, we have our share of eccentricities, of impetuous and wayward youngsters and... QUEEN ELIZABETH II My husband has quite simply been my strength and stay all these years, and I owe him a debt greater ... QUEEN ELIZABETH II It is easy enough to define what the Commonwealth is not. Indeed this is quite a popular pastime. QUEEN ELIZABETH II I have to be seen to be believed. QUEEN ELIZABETH II I have in sincerity pledged myself to your service, as so many of you are pledged to mine. Throughou... QUEEN ELIZABETH II I hope that tomorrow we can all, wherever we are, join in expressing our grief at Diana's loss, ... QUEEN ELIZABETH II I myself prefer my New Zealand eggs for breakfast. QUEEN ELIZABETH II The British constitution has always been puzzling and always will be. QUEEN ELIZABETH II I have behind me not only the splendid traditions and the annals of more than a thousand years but t... QUEEN ELIZABETH II To what greater inspiration and counsel can we turn than to the imperishable truth to be found in th... QUEEN ELIZABETH II What were once only hopes for the future have now come to pass; it is almost exactly 13 years since ... QUEEN ELIZABETH II First, I want to pay tribute to Diana myself. She was an exceptional and gifted human being. In good... QUEEN ELIZABETH II I cannot lead you into battle. I do not give you laws or administer justice but I can do something e... QUEEN ELIZABETH II To all those who have suffered as a consequence of our troubled past I extend my sincere thoughts an... QUEEN ELIZABETH II Grief is the price we pay for love. QUEEN ELIZABETH II The upward course of a nation's history is due in the long run to the soundness of heart of its ... QUEEN ELIZABETH II At its heart, engineering is about using science to find creative, practical solutions. It is a nobl... QUEEN ELIZABETH II At Christmas, I am always struck by how the spirit of togetherness lies also at the heart of the Chr... QUEEN ELIZABETH II For many, Christmas is also a time for coming together. But for others, service will come first. QUEEN ELIZABETH II The lessons from the peace process are clear; whatever life throws at us, our individual responses w... QUEEN ELIZABETH II I declare before you all that my whole life, whether it be long or short, shall be devoted to your s... QUEEN ELIZABETH II Therefore I am sure that this, my Coronation, is not the symbol of a power and a splendor that are g... QUEEN ELIZABETH II We lost the American colonies because we lacked the statesmanship to know the right time and the man... QUEEN ELIZABETH II Madam President, speaking here in Dublin Castle it is impossible to ignore the weight of history, as... QUEEN ELIZABETH II These wretched babies don't come until they are ready. QUEEN ELIZABETH II I know of no single formula for success. But over the years I have observed that some attributes of ... QUEEN ELIZABETH II The events that I have attended to mark my Diamond Jubilee have been a humbling experience. It has t... QUEEN ELIZABETH II In remembering the appalling suffering of war on both sides, we recognise how precious is the peace ... QUEEN ELIZABETH II Like all the best families, we have our share of eccentricities, of impetuous and wayward youngsters... QUEEN ELIZABETH II No one who knew Diana will ever forget her. Millions of others who never met her, but felt they knew... QUEEN ELIZABETH II I have been aware all the time that my peoples, spread far and wide throughout every continent and o... QUEEN ELIZABETH II May I never neither turn left nor turn right in my journey of life, but may I go straight to Christ ... ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH Feast of Teresa of Avila, Mystic, Teacher, 1582 Our body has this defect that, the more it is p... TERESA OF AVILA I think that many people will intentionally overlook all of the lifeless facts about their relations... C. JOYBELL C. To my mind the life of a lamb is no less precious than the life of a human being. I should be unwill... MAHATMA GANDHI I do know that the body is going to be embalmed and the body and the children will be coming in toni... EDYTHE SCOTT BAGLEY In terms of body language, management seemed a little more defensive to us than usual. Moreover, we ... LES FUNTLEYDER
More Dave Sim
Anything done for the first time unleashes a demon. DAVE SIM If you haven't signed anything, you cant be ripped off. DAVE SIM The evidence that I see around me in society indicates that not only is thinking very much out of fa... DAVE SIM Leftist reactions are always histrionic. DAVE SIM As soon as you go into merchandising, everyone nods sagely and says, 'Ah, now we know why you ar... DAVE SIM 'Cerebus' is my attempt at a literary work. DAVE SIM For the first time in your conscious memory; for the first time in fact, since your were a baby; a s... DAVE SIM These are ideas. I could say that they just came to me, but it would be more accurate to say that I ... DAVE SIM Gone is the blinding glow in his hands - gone, too, is the illusion of purity and beauty! In it's pl... DAVE SIM Everyone is normal until you get to know them DAVE SIM Once a profound truth has been seen, it cannot be 'unseen'. There's no 'going back' to the person yo... DAVE SIM I know what you're going to say! 'They are men, and men should be free.' A free man is dangerous to ... DAVE SIM There is nothing wrong with making mistakes, but one should always make new ones. R... DAVE SIM Women, he would say, are not Muses. Muses are Muses. To confuse one with the other is to mistake the... DAVE SIM North American leftists just keep trying to relive the '60s, or to make the '60s happen agai... DAVE SIM I like the idea that my audience doesn't see what I do as controversial. DAVE SIM I'm comfortable having a specific audience to write to. I like the idea that my audience doesn... DAVE SIM Leftists always want to... circle around subjects... rather than addressing any subject directly. DAVE SIM I know what you're going to say! 'They are men, and men should be free.' A free man is d... DAVE SIM Feminists are in an untenable position, defending something they no longer believe in, and which his... DAVE SIM Everyone is normal until you get to know them. DAVE SIM Once a profound truth has been seen, it cannot be 'unseen'. There's no 'going back... DAVE SIM I feel more confident and like I have more to say. I feel like I'm working more than ever, not j... OLIVER SIM There very likely was something else going on that caused this event, DAVID SIM It appears that there was very likely something else going on in his case that caused him to have th... DAVID SIM You don't see these magnets come out. They're half the size of a popcorn kernel. SIM OSBORN We are going to train the toilet cleaners to upgrade himself or herself to a level where he or she c... JACK SIM We are going to train the toilet cleaners to upgrade himself or herself to a level where he or she c... JACK SIM Why is the sky blue but the sun is always red? The sky is always sad and the sun is always happy. Th... SIM STEVENZ Don't challenge resistance. Don't resist challenge. SIM STEVENZ We have never had a Midget tournament here. The highest we've had is Bantam. And it's the first nati... TED SIM I watched Ward wrestle before and knew what he liked to do. I had a game plan and followed it. I sta... TYLER SIM My writing has changed a lot. From 16 to 19, I've changed a lot. My kind of writing in the begin... OLIVER SIM It's long overdue. It can't get worse than what's already happening. It can only get better. JACK SIM I know of some toilets in Korea where you can drink tea -- you don't feel you are in an awkward situ... JACK SIM We have been conditioned not to talk about it, JACK SIM We are going to train the toilet cleaner to upgrade himself or herself to a level where he or she ca... JACK SIM There are 2,6 billion people in the world who have no toilets, ... They are toilet-less and what we ... JACK SIM After shopping for one or two hours, customers want to visit the toilet and if toilet not good, they... JACK SIM The Code of Practice is needed for all new buildings before they can get licence to occupy. So it's ... JACK SIM The bill is coming out. We've been working with NEA (National Environment Agency) for some time now. JACK SIM That's those finishing few holes - they can just really eat you up if you're not on your game. MICHAEL SIM We want to see [these dogs] caught before they do any more damage. I don't know how dangerous these ... SIM DAVIDSON If Nature is opposed, we will fight her and make her obbey us. SIMóN BOLíVAR If my death contributes to the ceasing of the parties and to the consolidation of the union, I s... SIMóN BOLíVAR God grants victory to perseverance. SIMóN BOLíVAR An ignorant people is the blind instrument of its own destruction. SIMóN BOLíVAR The first duty of a government is to give education to the people SIMóN BOLíVAR The United States appear to be destined by Providence to plague America with misery in the name of l... SIMóN BOLíVAR Out of the most secure things, the most secure is to doubt. 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DAVE BARRY Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is ... DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ... DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to a... DAVE BARRY The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. DAVE BARRY It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso... DAVE BARRY The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire. DAVE BARRY I never excelled at one sport or had a very strong passion for anything other than wrestling and bod... DAVE BAUTISTA A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are t... DAVE ATTELL As an individual, I think you have to find your own path. I like the simplicity and purity of Hindui... DAVE DAVIES I had a few brushes with death, where I nearly chose to go. The final one in 1996 did it for me. I s... DAVE GAHAN The important thing to remember is that bugs don't actually talk. DAVE FOLEY When people get disillusioned and get insecure and content about the future, they tend to brood abou... DAVE DAVIES Jazz isn't dead yet. It's the underpinning of everything in this country. Whether it's a... DAVE BRUBECK And that's actually the brunt of what we do is, people going straight from their workplace, stra... DAVE EGGERS That's country music for you - bourbon and the Bible. DAVE HAYWOOD So this is the space during tutoring hours. It's very busy. Same principles: one-on-one attentio... DAVE EGGERS You can do and use the skills that you have. The schools need you. The teachers need you. Students a... DAVE EGGERS The Left likes to think of itself as the bulwark of progressive liberal individualism, and yet it se... DAVE BRAT Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business. DAVE BARRY A standard sitcom... is a very standard idea, like these people falling in love and living with each... DAVE FINKEL Standing out as a writer today requires more than a bright idea and limpid prose. Authors need to be... DAVE MORRIS Empire Square production finishes in about a month's time, so at the moment, right now, I'm ... DAVE ROWNTREE It is criminal to put our servicemen and women in harm's way and to put the lives of so many civ... DAVE MATTHEWS We don't have enough people going into those fields and there is a high burnout rate in some hea... DAVE OBEY Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is th... DAVE BARRY If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers. DAVE BARRY The question is, why are politicians so eager to be president? What is it about the job that makes i... DAVE BARRY I go to see some big shows of other bands, and I feel like I'm so bombarded and over-stimulated ... DAVE GAHAN I'm tired of high policy talks. I want to focus on nuts and bolts. DAVE FREUDENTHAL The thing that will never go away is that connection you make with a band or a song where you're... DAVE GROHL I played a homosexual bodyguard in 'The Last Detective,' and that was quite a pleasure to do... DAVE LEGENO It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso... DAVE BARRY The baby boomer surge is forcing society to face decisions about costs - and particularly what is va... DAVE DEBRONKART Granted, a long book can be as daunting as a hard one. I nearly reached for 'Game of Thrones'... DAVE MORRIS Joy comes from places you least expect it. It's usually the simple things, like watching my son ... DAVE GAHAN If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to... DAVE BARRY The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or... DAVE BARRY The waves of love roll throughout the Universe, and overflow in our hearts.. Everything is ONE! DAVE ZEBIAN I like the relaxed way in which the Japanese approach religion. I think of myself as basically a mor... DAVE BARRY I'm so alive. As I stand facing the beauty of the never-ending Pacific Ocean, a late afte... DAVE PELZER 'Breaking Bad' and 'The Shield' were planned right from the start so that their narr... DAVE MORRIS I found there's a fairly blatant racism in America that's already there, and I don't thi... DAVE MATTHEWS I want to make hand-held music, undiminished by the need to make everybody in the world listen at on... DAVE SITEK We all have to die some day, if we live long enough. DAVE FARBER We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless... DAVE BARRY The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitutio... DAVE BARRY There just isn’t enough cock in this world to be caught suckin’ and be called anything but a slu... DAVE MATTHES ...you're either gonna spend your life fucking pussy, or taking it to church. DAVE MATTHES I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer. DAVE BARRY That’s what books do. They are the building blocks, the DNA, if you will, of you. Think of everyth... DAVE EGGERS I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and that there would be time to l... DAVE EGGERS Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on. DAVE BARRY It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know ... DAVE BARRY You had me at "We'll make it look like an accident." DAVE BARRY Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms! DAVE BARRY I'd take a nerf bullet for you. DAVE BARRY What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car... DAVE BARRY The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter ... DAVE BARRY It was not that Adam ate the apple for the apple's sake, but because it was forbidden. It would have... DAVE BARRY I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to r... DAVE BARRY Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic. DAVE BARRY I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it. DAVE BARRY In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is ba... DAVE BARRY Books have a unique way of stopping time in a particular moment and saying: Let’s not forget this. 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Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would b... DAVE BARRY A theme is a memory aid, it helps you through the presentation just as it also provides the thread o... DAVE CAREY What Women Want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be... DAVE BARRY Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popula... DAVE BARRY Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated ... DAVE BARRY Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told. DAVE BARRY There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who ... DAVE BARRY The obvious and fair solution to the housework problem is to let men do the housework for, say, the ... DAVE BARRY It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in... DAVE BARRY In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went... DAVE BARRY Although Golf was originally restricted to wealthy Protestants, today its open to anybody who owns h... DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybo... DAVE BERRY I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any ... DAVE BARRY The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot. DAVE BARRY A thunderstorm is God's way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer DAVE BARRY It is a good idea to "shop around" before you settle on a doctor. Ask about the condition of his Mer... DAVE BARRY Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the p... DAVE BARRY The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they... DAVE BARRY My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible. DAVE BARRY The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning "ability to," and bics, meaning "withst... DAVE BARRY Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris... DAVE BARRY The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition. DAVE BARRY The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas... DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless y... DAVE BARRY Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that h... DAVE BARRY If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving infant's life, she will choose to sa... DAVE BARRY And computers are getting smarter all the time: scientists tell us that soon they will be able to ta... DAVE BARRY The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious pe... DAVE BARRY Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason. DAVE BARRY New York Taxi Rules:1. Driver speaks no English.2. Driver just got here two days ago from someplace ... DAVE BARRY Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organiza... DAVE BARRY Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won... DAVE BARRY Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night DAVE BARRY Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business. DAVE BARRY Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. DAVE BARRY I care about our young people, and I wish them great success, because they are our Hope for the Futu... DAVE BARRY One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a compute... DAVE BARRY If you can't excell with talent, triumph with effort. DAVE WEINBAUM People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with th... DAVE BARRY Our environmental problems originate in the hubris of imagining ourselves as the central nervous sys... DAVE FOREMAN Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see wit... DAVE BARRY We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but ... DAVE BARRY We are not meant to know everything, Mae. Did you ever think that perhaps our minds are delicately c... DAVE EGGERS You sit at a desk twelve hours a day and you have nothing to show for it except some numbers that wo... DAVE EGGERS It’s not that I’m not social. I’m social enough. But the tools you guys create actually manufa... DAVE EGGERS Even in a country like the USA where fitness has become an obsession, most people exercising do not ... DAVE WILSON Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, usi... DAVE BARRY We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this i... DAVE BARRY Life's real failure is when you do not realize how close you were to success when you gave up. DAVE CHECKETT You can't choose what you're famous for in life. DAVE KELLETT The English language was carefully, carefully cobbled together by three blind dudes and a German dic... DAVE KELLETT A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' comes together. It is when an imperfect couple lea... DAVE MEURER Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should aris... DAVE BARRY The future is no place to place your better days. DAVE MATTHEWS Nothing can do what a book can do. Lifts you out of your life... to a whole new world, whole new per... DAVE KELLETT I was trying to make the web more civil. I was trying to make it more elegant. I got rid of anonymit... DAVE EGGERS Gang violence in America is not a sudden problem. It has been a part of urban life for years, offeri... DAVE REICHERT It's all very boring to say that we get along great and all that and sometimes we mock up come a... DAVE EDMUNDS To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent. DAVE BARRY American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, includi... DAVE BARRY Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television witho... DAVE BARRY In terms of personalities - I don't care about the personalities, I want leadership that's i... DAVE BRAT I became a war hero before going on to critical acclaim as a professional victim. DAVE PELZER Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects. DAVE BARRY When you please others in hopes of being accepted, you lose you self-worth in the process. DAVE PELZER Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who re... DAVE BARRY I work 338 days a year, 16 hours a day. DAVE PELZER At a family's most difficult time, I want to make sure at a minimum that they have the very basi... DAVE REICHERT