I think i am too chaotic to ever get depressed. Depression somehow requires an ordered mind where the depression can get hold. Depressions just give up on me, usually at first sight. It's mutual - I find them really tedious and boring.

Is gedichten schrijven een roeping, een vak of een hobby? Nou, alle drie natuurlijk. Als het alleen een roeping is is het te serieus. Als het alleen een vak is te saai. Als het alleen een hobby is te vrijblijvend. Het moet dus serieus, saai en vrijblijvend tegelijk zijn.

Something in me - probably a small, nationalist dwarf part of my brain - something in me would like to feel proud of Dutch literature. But its hard to when the annual 'book week gift' year in year out is granted to a male. I dont like being part of an unjust system. But let me say this: it is the election method that is the real problem here. The 'vergadering' (meeting) that employs a simple flagging system - the basic way almost everything is decided here, from literary prizes to how much money is divided - it is a system based on the destruction of subtle values. You cannot ever ever say: I didnt understand this book. You can only say 'yes' or 'no'. And that system, that annihilates all forms of subtlety, that system is patriarchal in all its essence. So its useless to simply maintain the method, and try alter the outcome.

Facebook is a ghetto for the creative part of society. It was created so the rest of society can function without having to pay attention to these weird folks that just keep yapping about stuff no one understands. The journalists and politicians are all on Twitter, producing the sort of soundbites the media love. Hence, the division between facebook and twitter essentially is the new class division, created by the powers-that-be to enforce the world to stay exactly as it is.

Mensen vragen wel eens, geloof jij in God, Martinus? En dan zeg ik ja, uiteraard. Wat ik er dan niet bij vertel is dat ik ook geloof dat hij donkergroen is, inferieur aan de mens en uit op het stelen van mijn portemonnee. Want dan zit er altijd wel een slimmerik tussen die vraagt of God dan ook een hoed op heeft, en of ik hem niet met een leprechaun verwar, een schepsel waar de Nederlanders nooit een woord voor hebben uitgevonden. En ik zou niet weten wat ik daarop moet antwoorden, behalve dan dat God absoluut een hoed draagt, en zeer waarschijnlijk met een klavertje vier rondloopt, wat hij ook wel nodig heeft want ik heb helemaal geen portemonnee.

After we eat of the Apple of Knowledge, however, all of us start to be aware of ourselves, and our consciousness starts to be divided from our being. We start to have an image of ourselves which blocks our true expression.

How do we go from there? There are two ways of dealing with this situation. The first is to find a self-image one is comfortable with. This is what most people do. It has some advantages since it causes the mind to operate reasonably undisturbed and it brings some peace to most people. People who find and maintain a self-image they are comfortable with are generally known as ‘happy people’.

It doesn’t mean a whole lot, because in fact this image they are comfortable with is completely fake. There is another road, the road of learning to get rid of all self-imagery. This is a hard road however and requires one to pretty much battle for the rest of ones life (which isn’t a bad thing at all since the sense and meaning of life are essentially to put up a good battle). One develops techniques to stop identifying with ones self-image. The more these mechanisms behind self-imagery are mastered the more easy it becomes to switch and correct ones identities. At some point we can simply get rid of the self-image and be reborn as the child we once were, but a different child who has the triumph of knowledge in his pocket.