I tell yeh, Bright-eyes. Men and women? A bloody mess. Every time.


David Kudler

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Yeh don’ have ter be ashamed of what yeh are.
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Men and women aren't too dissimilar.
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Women have got to make the world safe for men since men have made it so darned unsafe for women.
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Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.
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I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home, which answer the same purpose ...
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I married beneath me. All women do.
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For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely unnatur...
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Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon them.
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Want him to be more of a man? Try being more of a woman!
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Study to be quiet, and to do your own business. [1 Thessalonians 4:11].
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If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
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In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved.
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Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
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Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what y...
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Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
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Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
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It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
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All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
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A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do yo...
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A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
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Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...b...
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Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her o...
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An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested he is ...
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If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.
LENNY BRUCE
Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.
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I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate.
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Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.
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Instead of getting hard ourselves and trying to compete, women should try to give their best qualiti...
JOAN BAEZ
Women like silent men. They think they're listening.
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My wife organized the Jewish Women's Caucus boycott of Moses.. wait.. ! I am receiving a correction ...
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Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.
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She is not made to be the admiration of all, but the happiness of one.
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If Rosa Parks had taken a poll before she sat down in the bus in Montgomery, she'd still be standing...
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Woman was God's second mistake.
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No woman marries for money; they are all clever enough, before marrying a millionaire, to fall in lo...
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The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman.
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It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.
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I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to m...
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The woman who is known only through a man is known wrong.
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A woman's head is always influenced by heart; but a man's heart by his head. -Lady Marguerite Bless...
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If it's a woman, its caustic; if it's a man, it's authoritative. -Barbara Walters.
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A good cigar is as great a comfort to a man as a good cry is to a woman.
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There is nothing enduring in life for a woman except what she builds in a man's heart.
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They say that women talk too much. If you have worked in congress you know that the filibuster was i...
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The rules of morality are not the conclusion of our reason.
DAVID HUME
Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper.
DAVID HILBERT
But Dr. Smith says, and I believe it to be a true state of the case, that he himself gave a course o...
DAVID RITTENHOUSE
I played hockey in the winter, and then I would play golf in the summer. But I always knew I'd b...
DAVID HEARN
Enjoyment of the landscape is a thrill.
DAVID HOCKNEY
Through the years I've been getting better and better and better, and it's what you learn th...
DAVID ORTIZ
'The Sopranos' is filled with really retrograde humor. Bathroom humor, falls, stupid puns, b...
DAVID CHASE
I am more weary of life, I think, than ever I was.
DAVID BRAINERD
The important thing is for the characters to feel real, and to be given the humanity they are due. T...
DAVID LEVITHAN
You can't take a knife on a plane anymore, but you can get on carrying a virus.
DAVID QUAMMEN
Trying on pants is one of the most humiliating things a man can suffer that doesn't involve a wo...
LARRY DAVID
When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name, I would walk around the street...
LARRY DAVID
I'm a walking, talking enigma.
LARRY DAVID
I think we're all good and bad, but good's not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and le...
LARRY DAVID
I'm a walking, talking enigma. We're a dying breed.
LARRY DAVID
When I was living in New York, there was a lot of screaming in my life. I would just get into these ...
LARRY DAVID
My background is degradation and sloth, mostly.
LARRY DAVID
I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the National Guard, ...
LARRY DAVID
It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home than overseas.
LARRY DAVID
In those days, reserve duty lasted for six years, which, I might add, was three times as long as ser...
LARRY DAVID
I tend to stay with the panic. I embrace the panic.
LARRY DAVID
If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny.
LARRY DAVID
Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm deaf and I try to imagine what it's lik...
LARRY DAVID
I'm surprised sometimes at how some of my actions are misinterpreted.
LARRY DAVID
Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to do their fighting f...
LARRY DAVID
I don't like to make a big splash anyway.
LARRY DAVID
I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.
LARRY DAVID
Dementia is our most-feared illness, more than heart disease or cancer.
DAVID PERLMUTTER
We may never understand illnesses such as cancer. In fact, we may never cure it. But an ounce of pre...
DAVID AGUS
Sometimes when you get disappointment it makes you stronger.
DAVID RUDISHA
Bishops and judges are some of the best politicians in the world. They know how to manipulate the po...
DAVID BLUNKETT
The Holocaust, taken by itself, is a black hole. To look at it directly is to be swallowed up by it.
DAVID NOVAK
I have been growing this moustache, a budding Burt Reynolds number, for a good cause known as Movemb...
DAVID SAX