I left the Shire,
got 7 outstanding N.E.W.T.'s
and became a Vampire;
Because Winter is Coming...

Tradition, thought Merkin, was not the most reliable thing in the world. Tradition had this nasty habit of asserting itself overnight. A new species of funny-shaped, bioluminescent invertebrate found sixteen thousand feet under the ocean might instantly become part of the Chinese traditional medicine, for instance. You never knew.

As a little girl I always expected that one day adventure would happen to me—someday a tornado would whisk me away to Oz, or I’d fall down a rabbit hole, or David Bowie would kidnap me and take me to his labyrinth where he’d sing me songs and feed me magic peaches. (I still sorta wish David Bowie would kidnap me, but that’s beside the point.) As I get older, I realize you have to make adventure happen for yourself. I hope this cookbook helps you, dear reader, to make some tasty adventures for yourself—and maybe throw some really awesome LARP parties.

As far as I could tell, the quickest way to a geeky guy's heart usually involved geometric shapes.

It was all kind of fuzzy, as if his mind was doing its thinking in limericks.

Simon did not solve problems, he just shamed them into going away.