I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as dull as ditch water: I hate to go to bed, I hate to get up, and I hate to be alone.

It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

It's the good girls who keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

Let's not quibble! I'm the foe of moderation, the champion of excess. If I may lift a line from a die-hard whose identity is lost in the shuffle, "I'd rather be strongly wrong than weakly right."

They used to photograph Shirley Temple through gauze. They should photograph me through linoleum.

Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once.