I have taken more good from alcohol than alcohol has taken from me.

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

I remember, when I was a child, being taken to the celebrated Barnum's circus, which contained an exhibition of freaks and monstrosities, but the exhibit . . . which I most desired to see was the one described as 'The Boneless Wonder'.

I always avoid prophesying beforehand, because it is a much better policy to prophesy after the event has already taken place.

It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations.