I have no clue. I have ovaries; therefore, I repel all things mechanical.

Where did you get that dress?
I stole it from a homeless person," I say straight-faced. "She was lying right beside the stripper that gave you yours.

You are such a piece of shit," I yell into the quiet cab, slapping the horn accidentally. It makes a sound like a wounded duck. "Don't you talk back to me! You're this close to going to car heaven at the junk yard.

I am never one to judge others; I am so eccentric myself that I have no right to cast aspersions. A person may or may not like a thing, and I have little to say other than I love it too or how could you dare not like it please die promptly, but I leave everyone to find their own niches in time. We are all avid about certain things; I happen to rave over many subjects, all of which have a place in the Kingdom of Nerdonia, and whenever I hear someone unjustly disparage a thing I consider sacred, I lay it down that the person is either mistaken or a dunderwhelp, the latter being the likeliest of the two. There is a great difference between knowledge accompanied by bias and ignorance accompanied by gallantry, and while all tastes may be what they are, there are bare necessities that will immediately define a character and relationship, these things usually being how many Monty Python lines one knows and whether or not they know what Iocaine is.

The strength of lasting friendships rests on whether one can sing the theme to Neverending Story.

Smoking will probably kill me, but so will natural selection.

Some people make things happen. Some people watch things happen. And then there are those who wonder, 'What the hell just happened?