FastSaying
I got into an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because then I tried to walk out and slammed the flap. How are you supposed to express your anger in this situation? Zipper it up really quick?
Mitch Hedberg
Camping
Related Quotes
If I had nine of my fingers missing I wouldn't type any slower.
— Mitch Hedberg
Any
Fingers
Had
A severed foot is the perfect stocking stuffer.
— Mitch Hedberg
Christmas
Foot
Perfect
I think Pringles initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But Pringles is a laid back company. They said "F**k it. Cut em up."
— Mitch Hedberg
Day
Food
Funny
Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?
— Mitch Hedberg
Cool
Hippopotamus
Just
I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.
— Mitch Hedberg
Buy
Cake
Candle