I fully expect the police to come after me. To which I have just one thing to say: good luck.

By all means, tell the cops about the crazy robot lady with the black leather body suit and the Kill Bill sword. Hope you like straitjackets.

So now that you know my truth, let's talk about yours.

Did you seriously just use the word 'loins'?

You're no better. Playing dress-up like you know right from wrong. Who made you the fucking hero?

I did.

I always pick a gorgeous time to fall over a suitcase or something.