I enjoyed the courtroom as just another stage, but not so amusing as Broadway.

(During a trial in which she was accused of indecency on stage)Judge: 'Miss West, are you trying to show contempt for this court?'Mae West: 'On the contrary, your Honor, I was doin' my best to conceal it.'

It's not what you can do, but the way you do it that counts.

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork

Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present.

Love thy neighbor -- and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.