I don't really know of the Jewish tradition of comedy, only the Jewish tradition of not keeping your mouth shut. Complaining about all that is hard, unfair or ridiculous in life-having strong feelings, and not being able to suppress them. That, to me, is Jewish.
Fred Melamed
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More Fred Melamed
I am tolerably ignorant about Judaism, and much of what I do know about it seems hard to swallow, be... FRED MELAMED Most of the time when I receive a script, it says something like 'Rosenberg is the fat, slovenly... FRED MELAMED Though I acted in hundreds of productions, appeared at the Guthrie Theatre and on Broadway in Amadeu... FRED MELAMED It cuts so wide as to even make confidential housing inspection reports. People should be able to kn... CAROL MELAMED All in all, if you look at the past five years, I don't see any real dire, extreme actions that woul... CAROL MELAMED They were very willing to sit down with the press and work out something that was targeted.... CAROL MELAMED Men look at themselves in mirrors. Women look for themselves. ELISSA MELAMED The Madrid bombers used cell phones, and there is talk of these remote triggering devices being used... HOWARD MELAMED To not allow first responders, state and local law enforcement officers the option of using this tec... HOWARD MELAMED Jamming equipment should only be used by the government, such as the police and the bomb squads, not... HOWARD MELAMED Clearly the Chinese market is going to overwhelm everything else in Asia. In the last five, six, sev... LEO MELAMED This agreement contributes to the deepening liquidity in the foreign currency market in China. LEO MELAMED No doubt, in the next 20 to 25 years, Asia is where the growth is coming. They're going to need thos... LEO MELAMED $50,000 is ... the number I think the retail investor can use, LEO MELAMED The portfolio [exposure] of $50,000 is quite low, actually, LEO MELAMED I think the bond market has a problem. In one respect, you have flight to quality, in another, the j... LEO MELAMED The world situation is a very skittish situation right now and our investor world has been a little ... LEO MELAMED We're going to fight racism not with racism, but we're going to fight with solidarity. We sa... FRED HAMPTON I would suggest maintaining a life and a career outside the Industry. This is a fickle business and ... FRED SAVAGE I am the people, I'm not the pig. You got to make a distinction. And the people are going to hav... FRED HAMPTON Investing in management means building communication systems, business processes, feedback, and rout... FRED WILSON For those broadcasters who are less than responsible, the FCC needs to have sharper teeth to enforce... FRED UPTON One of the first shows I ever did was 'Laverne & Shirley.' I played this sleazy guy that... FRED WILLARD I can say I won a Senior British Open at Turnberry. I think that's the best thing about it, the ... FRED COUPLES Ethereum has taken what was a four-function calculator of a programming language in Bitcoin and turn... FRED EHRSAM You really have to understand this isn't a business where you sit in the back room and do calcul... FRED DELUCA I'd love to have Burt Reynolds' career. FRED WILLARD I've always been a fan of instructional videos. The bass-player ones are insane. The music on th... FRED ARMISEN I left home at 17, traveled. I got married when I was 21. That's a young age. As it turned out, ... FRED COUPLES I always loved comedy growing up - Bob Hope, Red Skelton and Danny Kaye. FRED WILLARD I loved Bob Hope and the way he would turn to the camera and break the fourth wall. FRED WILLARD The news is the one thing the networks can point to with pride. Everything else they do is crap - a... FRED FRIENDLY Technology is a way of organizing the universe so that man doesn't have to experience it. FRED HOYLE There is a coherent plan to the universe, though I don't know
what it's a plan for. FRED HOYLE Space isn't remote at all. It's only an hour's drive away if
your car could go straight upwards. FRED HOYLE I think my wife saw a picture of the rock group Journey, and they're kind of aging, and the one ... FRED WILLARD It seems like such a terrible shame that innocent civilians have to get hurt in wars, otherwise comb... FRED WOODWORTH New York's niche is content, and content is becoming more valuable. Just think about what is mor... FRED WILSON I was really upset because I was branded as an enemy alien when I'm an American. FRED KOREMATSU You have to realize that the customer really is king. People who go into more established businesses... FRED DELUCA Why pay a dollar for a bookmark? Why not use the dollar for a bookmark? FRED STOLLER Government is an unnecessary evil. Human beings, when accustomed to taking responsibility for their ... FRED WOODWORTH We're going to see a lot more young people entering entrepreneurial ventures. FRED MALEK I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin. FRED ALLEN Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year. FRED ALLEN Where were you fellows when the paper was blank? FRED ALLEN A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better. FRED ALLEN An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about t... FRED ALLEN I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy. FRED ALLEN All television is children's television. FRED ALLEN If you took all the sincerity in Hollywood and put it in the navel of a fruit fly, you'd still have ... FRED ALLEN I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by. FRED ALLEN I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy
me. FRED ALLEN When you get through all the phony tinsel of Hollywood, you find the
genuine tinsel underneath. FRED ALLEN A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but
as a group decide nothing can ... FRED ALLEN Part of the problem with the word 'disabilities' is that it immediately suggests an inability to see... FRED ROGERS When I say it's you I like, I'm talking about that part of you that knows that life is far more than... FRED ROGERS The very best reason parents are so special . . . is because we are the holders of a priceless gift,... FRED ROGERS When you're prepared, you're more confident. When you have a strategy, you're more comfortable. FRED COUPLES I'm like a duck: calm above the water, and paddling like hell underneath. FRED SHERO I just put my feet in the air and move them around. FRED ASTAIRE The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. FRED ASTAIRE Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young. FRED ASTAIRE Happiness is a positive cash flow. FRED ADLER A man who is contented with what he has done will never become famous for what he will do. FRED ESTABROOK Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission. FRED ALLEN Boxing purists, quite naturally, question Tyson's appetite for victory. Mills Lane should have stopp... FRED MITCHELL A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to
become well known, then wears dark glasses to... FRED ALLEN I don't want to be the oldest performer in captivity... I don't want to look like a little old man d... FRED ASTAIRE The higher up you go, the more mistakes you are allowed. Right at the top, if you make enough of the... FRED ASTAIRE Dancing is a sweat job. FRED ASTAIRE Chance is the fool's name for Fate FRED ASTAIRE I am bit sending messages with my feet. All I ever wanted was not to come up empty. I did it for the... FRED ASTAIRE I'm just a hoofer with a spare set of tails FRED ASTAIRE Disco is just jitterbug. FRED ASTAIRE I am bit sending messages with my feet. All I ever wanted was not to come up empty. I did it for th... FRED ASTAIRE This search for what you want is like tracking something that doesn't want to be tracked. It takes t... FRED ASTAIRE The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. FRED ASTAIRE Imitation is the sincerest form of television. 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He's an undertaker in Alabama. FRED ALLEN Comedy always came easier for me. But I would have loved to have been an action hero. FRED WILLARD It scared me to death to think about improv, but I got hired for a year at Second City in Chicago, w... FRED WILLARD When you think about accountants, who would want to be an accountant? But, what would we do without ... FRED WILLARD You know, you don't have to look like everybody else to be acceptable and to feel acceptable. FRED ROGERS Tactics, fitness, stroke ability, adaptability, experience, and sportsmanship are all necessary for ... FRED PERRY Before the war, my parents were very proud people. They'd always talk about Japan and also about... FRED KOREMATSU New discoveries and production of resources like shale oil and gas are dramatically altering our ene... FRED UPTON Everything would be alright if everything was put back in the hands of the people, and we're goi... FRED HAMPTON Play is often talked about as if it were a relief from serious learning. But for children play is se... FRED ROGERS Sometimes you have to, as I say, build bridges where you can - but draw lines where you must. FRED THOMPSON The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that h... FRED ALLEN An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission. FRED ALLEN If human beings are fundamentally good, no government is necessary; if they are fundamentally bad, a... FRED WOODWORTH The problem is that agencies sometimes lose sight of common sense as they create regulations. FRED THOMPSON Profit or perish... There are only two ways to make money: increase sales and decrease costs. FRED DELUCA I was the King of Twinkie-Vision one day, the King of Jiggle TV the next, thanks to Farrah Fawcett a... FRED SILVERMAN You can't build a revolution with no education. Jomo Kenyatta did this in Africa, and because th... FRED HAMPTON I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin. FRED ALLEN Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be... FRED ALLEN It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive allianc... FRED ALLEN An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt. FRED ALLEN California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange. FRED ALLEN Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners. FRED ALLEN A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on. FRED ALLEN Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted. FRED ALLEN The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion. FRED ALLEN The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi. FRED ALLEN Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday an... FRED ALLEN A conference is a gathering of people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothin... FRED ALLEN A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but who, as a group, can meet and ... FRED ALLEN An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is abo... FRED ALLEN The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand. FRED ALLEN A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark g... FRED ALLEN I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back... FRED ALLEN I know the exploding cost of health care is at the root of our long-term fiscal challenges. FRED UPTON Martin Landau in 'Crimes and Misdemeanors' - he gave me chills. FRED WILLARD We say primarily that the priority of this struggle is class. That Marx and Lenin and Che Guevara an... FRED HAMPTON I think Kellie Martin, Reese Witherspoon and Claire Danes represent the future for women in film, an... FRED SAVAGE In the end, we may be hurting the very people we should be concerned about - the inner-city poor, th... FRED THOMPSON Cleveland is my hometown, and the Indians have a narrow but rich history. FRED WILLARD Someone I've always admired is Catherine O'Hara... I think she's one of the best actress... FRED WILLARD Venture capital is about capturing the value between the startup phase and the public company phase. FRED WILSON I don't want to be the oldest performer in captivity... I don't want to look like a little o... FRED ASTAIRE Our work on light bulbs wasn't an arbitrary mandate. We didn't just pick a standard out of t... FRED UPTON What's been important in my understanding of myself and others is the fact that each one of us is so... FRED ROGERS At 'SNL' there's framed pictures of all the cast members, and it starts with Dan Aykroyd... FRED ARMISEN When the Bitcoin white paper emerged in 2008, it was completely revolutionary. The amount of concept... FRED EHRSAM People far too often associate derivatives markets with mere speculation, but there are very legitim... FRED EHRSAM An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer. FRED ALLEN When I see people laughing at ideas and companies we have backed, I smile. It means we are going to ... FRED WILSON Obama is a very fine writer with an excellent command of language. His memoir 'Dreams From My Fa... FRED KAPLAN I've never crossed over to be a big star. I'd like to be in a big $100 million movie, though... FRED WILLARD When you drill down, blockchains are really a shared version of reality everyone agrees on. So wheth... FRED EHRSAM One of the great things about young entrepreneurs is that they don't know that something can'... FRED WILSON But if the Chinese mainland, the PRC, attacked Taiwan, we'd be obligated to come to their aid. FRED THOMPSON Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them a... FRED ALLEN A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary. FRED ALLEN The venture business is a bit of an apprenticeship business, so the firm I worked for didn't let... FRED WILSON I am just so appreciative of God's love. It's higher than any mountain, wider than any ocean... FRED HAMMOND My career progressed slowly. Real slow at a time. The irony of it was I had the best part of my care... FRED FUNK And when we draw lines in the sand with regard to certain basic things that are vital to our interes... FRED THOMPSON Basic research is to work at the very edge, the very border of, of knowledge, and move that border f... FRED KAVLI All of them turned their backs on me at that time because they thought I was a troublemaker. FRED KOREMATSU Presidents with strong nerves are decisive. They don't balk at unpopular decisions. They are wil... FRED BARNES The comments I most appreciate come from ordinary readers who've happened on one of my books at ... FRED SABERHAGEN It's critical - that the people that are benefiting today from Medicare and Social Security that... FRED UPTON I really like dating stories, like in Betty and Veronica comics; I like David Lynch and H.P. Lovecra... FRED SEIBERT I think we can lower our emissions. I think the world will be better off if we did that, and we can ... FRED UPTON I was able to solve enough big problems along the way that the sheriff didn't come along and put... FRED DELUCA There seems to be a vulnerability at the networks in late night. They are losing more and more audie... FRED SILVERMAN How you handle the obstacles has a big impact on how you do. If you give up, then you obviously don&... FRED DELUCA We've got to face the fact that some people say you fight fire best with fire, but we say you put fi... 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