I believe many Harley guys spend more time revving their engines than actually driving anywhere; I sometimes wonder why they bother to have wheels on their motorcycles.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.

Clearly, if you can't live within 1,000 feet of (a) playground, it doesn't stop you from driving in,

The one thing I wonder about is that those three guys in the review box. I know that all of them have prostate problems, because all three of them had to go to the bathroom at the same time and miss Vince Young putting his knee on the ground.

Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary to what you may have heard, the Internet does not operate at the speed of light; it operates at the speed of the DMV.

We were driving to Vegas for a show, ... In the middle of the desert, a giant fight broke out. I was driving, so I was trying not to throw any punches, just stiff-arming people's faces and stuff and trying to stay in the middle of the road. We didn't pull over. It was pretty much an inside-the-car fight. It was little out of control. I thought I was going to die.