I am myself a failed cartoonist,
Dave Eggers
Related
I am myself a failed cartoonist, There are a million reasons to ruin things.
DAVE EGGERS I never really thought of myself as an Asian-American cartoonist, any more than I thought of myself ...
ADRIAN TOMINE Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I failed in ...
SCOTT ADAMS Given the current state of publishing, I think it helps to have a brand name on the cover of your bo...
MICHAEL SHOWALTER I don't think of myself as an illustrator. I think of myself as a cartoonist. I write the story ...
CHRIS WARE I failed eating, failed drinking, failed not cutting myself into shreds. Failed friendship. Failed s...
LAURIE HALSE ANDERSON If you want to be a cartoonist, live the life of a cartoonist.
OLIVER GASPIRTZ Now Dave Eggers, if you lived in San Francisco, is not an easy person to be done with. Everyone - an...
JAMES BERNARD FROST I am a still friend with Dave Crosby, he's a weird duck but I like him a lot.
PETER TORK I am going to resign. The only way Dave can serve is if I resign, short of confirmation. I would not...
HERB BEHNKE I have failed many times, and that's why I am a success.
MICHAEL JORDAN I wanted to be a cartoonist when I was young.
JEAN-MICHEL BASQUIAT I am a mystery to myself.
ANGELINA GRIMKE A quote isn't a quote until that quote is quotably quoted by and official Quotesman
I AM TIMEPIECE The internet has too much information out there for you to ask a dumb question
I AM TIMEPIECE I am no longer a rare breed, I am an endangered species
I AM TIMEPIECE I wish there was an edit button on Life because sometimes we don't realize the mistakes we've made u...
I AM TIMEPIECE Life are full of memories, capture them
I AM TIMEPIECE I don't fit in because I was born to stand out
I AM TIMEPIECE I don't think of myself as pretty. I am what I am.
ISABELI FONTANA The monster within my closet was merely a part of myself I shunned and failed to acknowledge.
TYLER J. HEBERT I have disappointed and failed to live up to the standard I expected of myself.
ELIOT SPITZER I am myself of a mixed background.
QUIARA ALEGRIA HUDES I am self-centred. I just adore myself.
DANNY DEVITO I am an obsessive flyer, myself.
JASON REITMAN I am not in competition with my peers; I am in competition with myself.
DON DOKKEN I am addressing myself - I am addressing myself to my cap.
MOLIERE I went through a phase where people would introduce me at parties as a cartoonist, and everybody fel...
MATT GROENING I am what I am. I have not deliberately built an image for myself.
RAHUL DRAVID I am true only as I see and understand myself deep within; I am what I am for myself and in myself, ...
JEAN AMéRY I think it's a wise pick. Dave is a Pitt guy. Dave has a commitment to this university. The exciteme...
MIKE DITKA When I am myself, I am happy and have a good result.
JACK MA I hate this word 'graphic novel.' It is a term publishing houses have created for the bourge...
MARJANE SATRAPI Im not going to die because I failed as someone else. Im going to succeed as myself.
MARGARET CHO Being myself is what got me to where I am.
JEFF HARDY I consider myself a leader. I am not a follower.
STEFON DIGGS I don't look at myself as a writer; I am a storyteller.
VIKAS SWARUP I am a danger to myself if I get angry.
ORIANA FALLACI I am myself for a living. I don't animate a character.
JAMES TAYLOR I am definitely the queen. I definitely see myself as the queen.
LIL' KIM I was well beaten myself, and I am better for it.
BERNARD LAW MONTGOMERY I am really puzzled to understand myself.
LINCOLN STEFFENS I am not a dark person and I don't consider myself dark.
TIM BURTON God made me the way I am, and I accept myself. I am who I am, and I'm proud of myself.
CASTER SEMENYA I am a bio-hazard unto myself
LEIF ERICSSON LEO VENESS Look you! I myself am nearest to myself.
LORD ALFRED TENNYSON And that's actually the brunt of what we do is, people going straight from their workplace, stra...
DAVE EGGERS So this is the space during tutoring hours. It's very busy. Same principles: one-on-one attentio...
DAVE EGGERS You can do and use the skills that you have. The schools need you. The teachers need you. Students a...
DAVE EGGERS That’s what books do. They are the building blocks, the DNA, if you will, of you. Think of everyth...
DAVE EGGERS I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and that there would be time to l...
DAVE EGGERS Books have a unique way of stopping time in a particular moment and saying: Let’s not forget this.
DAVE EGGERS We have advantages. We have a cushion to fall back on. This is abundance. A luxury of place and time...
DAVE EGGERS We are not meant to know everything, Mae. Did you ever think that perhaps our minds are delicately c...
DAVE EGGERS You sit at a desk twelve hours a day and you have nothing to show for it except some numbers that wo...
DAVE EGGERS It’s not that I’m not social. I’m social enough. But the tools you guys create actually manufa...
DAVE EGGERS I was trying to make the web more civil. I was trying to make it more elegant. I got rid of anonymit...
DAVE EGGERS I think newspapers shouldn't try to compete directly with the Web, and should do what they can d...
DAVE EGGERS We see the beauty within and cannot say no.
DAVE EGGERS When I was on the bestseller list with the first book, everyone who knows me knows that every week i...
DAVE EGGERS The key thing is, even if you only have a couple of hours a month, those two hours shoulder-to-shoul...
DAVE EGGERS He must trust, and he must have faith. And so he builds, because what is building, and rebuilding an...
DAVE EGGERS Tim O'Brien's book about Vietnam, 'The Things They Carried', has won every award, is...
DAVE EGGERS I am a bike enthusiast; there's a certain amount of romance to bikes. They're both beautiful...
DAVE EGGERS It's our theory that everything trickles down from there, ... That if you have high salaries, good c...
DAVE EGGERS Status in itself is criminal for those with the means to move, and the means to weave communion betw...
DAVE EGGERS It all sounds good, and it seems to me, if a system would work, this might be the spot. But frankly,...
DAVE EGGERS I don't think there's a neighborhood where more writers live. There is no neighborhood in the world ...
DAVE EGGERS People are strange, but more than that, they're good. They're good first, then strange.
DAVE EGGERS I try to get anybody coming to San Francisco to come to the Mission. Not to misuse the word 'authent...
DAVE EGGERS They took my mother's stomach out six months ago.
DAVE EGGERS What can I do for you, my man?
DAVE EGGERS The kids sit facing the white board and collectively tell a story, ... As they're coming up with the...
DAVE EGGERS It was just an idea I had, that it could be cool to have a book covered in fake fur.
DAVE EGGERS There's nothing to be gained from passive observance, the simple documenting of conditions, because,...
DAVE EGGERS Who's got the Paris Review? ... It's under a new editor.
DAVE EGGERS The idea of 'Voice of Witness' is to let survivors and witnesses of human-rights abuses tell...
DAVE EGGERS It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent...
DAVE EGGERS But while mum and dad were incredibly caring, it was also a very chaotic household where everyone fo...
DAVE EGGERS I'm interested in the human impact of the giant foot of misplaced government. After all, we enco...
DAVE EGGERS His lies were so exquisite I almost wept.
DAVE EGGERS Yes, a dark time passed over this land, but now there is something like light.
DAVE EGGERS She needs a new journal. The one she has is problematic. To get to the present, she needs to page th...
DAVE EGGERS There’s less need to slowly acclimate these guys to the tank,” Bailey said. “They’ll be food...
DAVE EGGERS But while Sasha told us that in America even the most successful men can have but one wife at once--...
DAVE EGGERS Max had to think about these new developments. He hadn't liked getting hit by a rock--his stomach st...
DAVE EGGERS It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent.
DAVE EGGERS Our town was rigid in many ways, in terms of the uniformity of things, the colors of skin, the makes...
DAVE EGGERS Again the greatest use of a human was to be useful. Not to consume, not to watch, but to do somethin...
DAVE EGGERS This democracy thing, or Demoxie, whatever it is, good god. Under the guise of having every voice he...
DAVE EGGERS The raising of a child is the building of a cathedral. You can't cut corners.
DAVE EGGERS You see pictures of Buddha and he’s sitting, reclining, at peace. The Hindus have their twelve-arm...
DAVE EGGERS Here though, there are no oppressors. No one's forcing you to do this. You willingly tie yourself to...
DAVE EGGERS Dear Producers,
Something is radiating deep within me and it must be transmitted or I will imp...
DAVE EGGERS THE BOUNTY
In her kitchen, she saw many things she would like to eat. On the counter, there was...
DAVE EGGERS First of all, I know it’s all people like you. And that’s what’s so scary. Individua...
DAVE EGGERS I'd rather people just borrow the idea and do their own thing in their own community, ... Whenever p...
DAVE EGGERS [After this interview Eggers is off to a meeting in midtown Manhattan. Then come more appointments a...
DAVE EGGERS The house is a factory.
DAVE EGGERS Through the small tall bathroom window the December yard is gray and scratchy, the tree calligraphic...
DAVE EGGERS
More Dave Eggers
And that's actually the brunt of what we do is, people going straight from their workplace, stra...
DAVE EGGERS So this is the space during tutoring hours. It's very busy. Same principles: one-on-one attentio...
DAVE EGGERS You can do and use the skills that you have. The schools need you. The teachers need you. Students a...
DAVE EGGERS That’s what books do. They are the building blocks, the DNA, if you will, of you. Think of everyth...
DAVE EGGERS I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and that there would be time to l...
DAVE EGGERS Books have a unique way of stopping time in a particular moment and saying: Let’s not forget this.
DAVE EGGERS We have advantages. We have a cushion to fall back on. This is abundance. A luxury of place and time...
DAVE EGGERS We are not meant to know everything, Mae. Did you ever think that perhaps our minds are delicately c...
DAVE EGGERS You sit at a desk twelve hours a day and you have nothing to show for it except some numbers that wo...
DAVE EGGERS It’s not that I’m not social. I’m social enough. But the tools you guys create actually manufa...
DAVE EGGERS I was trying to make the web more civil. I was trying to make it more elegant. I got rid of anonymit...
DAVE EGGERS I think newspapers shouldn't try to compete directly with the Web, and should do what they can d...
DAVE EGGERS We see the beauty within and cannot say no.
DAVE EGGERS When I was on the bestseller list with the first book, everyone who knows me knows that every week i...
DAVE EGGERS The key thing is, even if you only have a couple of hours a month, those two hours shoulder-to-shoul...
DAVE EGGERS He must trust, and he must have faith. And so he builds, because what is building, and rebuilding an...
DAVE EGGERS Tim O'Brien's book about Vietnam, 'The Things They Carried', has won every award, is...
DAVE EGGERS I am a bike enthusiast; there's a certain amount of romance to bikes. They're both beautiful...
DAVE EGGERS It's our theory that everything trickles down from there, ... That if you have high salaries, good c...
DAVE EGGERS Status in itself is criminal for those with the means to move, and the means to weave communion betw...
DAVE EGGERS It all sounds good, and it seems to me, if a system would work, this might be the spot. But frankly,...
DAVE EGGERS I don't think there's a neighborhood where more writers live. There is no neighborhood in the world ...
DAVE EGGERS People are strange, but more than that, they're good. They're good first, then strange.
DAVE EGGERS I try to get anybody coming to San Francisco to come to the Mission. Not to misuse the word 'authent...
DAVE EGGERS They took my mother's stomach out six months ago.
DAVE EGGERS What can I do for you, my man?
DAVE EGGERS The kids sit facing the white board and collectively tell a story, ... As they're coming up with the...
DAVE EGGERS It was just an idea I had, that it could be cool to have a book covered in fake fur.
DAVE EGGERS There's nothing to be gained from passive observance, the simple documenting of conditions, because,...
DAVE EGGERS Who's got the Paris Review? ... It's under a new editor.
DAVE EGGERS The idea of 'Voice of Witness' is to let survivors and witnesses of human-rights abuses tell...
DAVE EGGERS It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent...
DAVE EGGERS But while mum and dad were incredibly caring, it was also a very chaotic household where everyone fo...
DAVE EGGERS I'm interested in the human impact of the giant foot of misplaced government. After all, we enco...
DAVE EGGERS His lies were so exquisite I almost wept.
DAVE EGGERS Yes, a dark time passed over this land, but now there is something like light.
DAVE EGGERS She needs a new journal. The one she has is problematic. To get to the present, she needs to page th...
DAVE EGGERS There’s less need to slowly acclimate these guys to the tank,” Bailey said. “They’ll be food...
DAVE EGGERS But while Sasha told us that in America even the most successful men can have but one wife at once--...
DAVE EGGERS Max had to think about these new developments. He hadn't liked getting hit by a rock--his stomach st...
DAVE EGGERS It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent.
DAVE EGGERS Our town was rigid in many ways, in terms of the uniformity of things, the colors of skin, the makes...
DAVE EGGERS Again the greatest use of a human was to be useful. Not to consume, not to watch, but to do somethin...
DAVE EGGERS This democracy thing, or Demoxie, whatever it is, good god. Under the guise of having every voice he...
DAVE EGGERS The raising of a child is the building of a cathedral. You can't cut corners.
DAVE EGGERS You see pictures of Buddha and he’s sitting, reclining, at peace. The Hindus have their twelve-arm...
DAVE EGGERS Here though, there are no oppressors. No one's forcing you to do this. You willingly tie yourself to...
DAVE EGGERS Dear Producers,
Something is radiating deep within me and it must be transmitted or I will imp...
DAVE EGGERS THE BOUNTY
In her kitchen, she saw many things she would like to eat. On the counter, there was...
DAVE EGGERS First of all, I know it’s all people like you. And that’s what’s so scary. Individua...
DAVE EGGERS I'd rather people just borrow the idea and do their own thing in their own community, ... Whenever p...
DAVE EGGERS [After this interview Eggers is off to a meeting in midtown Manhattan. Then come more appointments a...
DAVE EGGERS The house is a factory.
DAVE EGGERS Through the small tall bathroom window the December yard is gray and scratchy, the tree calligraphic...
DAVE EGGERS Like I don’t know the first thing about how to be simply grateful that I’m alive. Maybe that’s...
DAVE EGGERS That is when the commitment to change would be put to the test: when the cameras are gone and the re...
DAVE EGGERS it seemed, had some purpose, even if that purpose was just to ask for something.
DAVE EGGERS But you know, there's something about the kids finishing their homework in a given day, working ...
DAVE EGGERS I publish my own books, so there isn't a certain editor I owe the book to at a publishing house.
DAVE EGGERS McSweeney's as a publishing company is built on a business model that only works when we sell ph...
DAVE EGGERS I've purposely stayed away from reading much about postmodern theory, and most everything I have...
DAVE EGGERS My mind, I know, I can prove, hovers on hummingbird wings. It hovers and it churns. And when it's op...
DAVE EGGERS I have no idea how people function without near-constant internal chaos. I'd lose my mind.
DAVE EGGERS Still though, I think if you're not self-obsessed, you're probably boring.
DAVE EGGERS All we really want is for no one to have a boring life, to be impressive, so we can be impressed. ~ ...
DAVE EGGERS Why do you want to be on The Real World?
-Because I want everyone to witness my youth
DAVE EGGERS We feel that to reveal embarrassing or private things, we have given someone something, that, like a...
DAVE EGGERS It seemed the whole world knew this person named Diana, and if the world knew her, the connection be...
DAVE EGGERS If a boy became sick he walked alone; the others were afraid to catch what he had, and did not want ...
DAVE EGGERS We thought we were young and that there would be time to love well sometime in the future. This is a...
DAVE EGGERS This morning there s first a predictable story about Darfur; an expert on African affairs notes that...
DAVE EGGERS The truth is that I do not like hanging in there. I was born, I believe, to do more. Or perhaps it's...
DAVE EGGERS It was always difficult to get cattle returned once a marriage was dissolved.
DAVE EGGERS But without William K, I would have forgotten that I had not been born on this journey. That I had l...
DAVE EGGERS The issue is complex, but like many matters in Sudan, it is not as complex as Khartoum would want th...
DAVE EGGERS I often cannot believe the things I do.
DAVE EGGERS But we're no longer rain, I said, we're no longer seeds. We're men. Now we can stand and decide. Thi...
DAVE EGGERS I have had friends who I decided were not good friends, were people who brought more trouble than ha...
DAVE EGGERS In hospitals I feel palpable comfort. I feel the competence, the expertise, so much education and mo...
DAVE EGGERS Hello Frances, I have just been to health class, and I was wondering how your feminine parts were de...
DAVE EGGERS Nothing again. No one is listening. No one is waiting to hear the kicking of a man above. It is unex...
DAVE EGGERS I will tell these stories...because to do anything else would be something less than human. I speak ...
DAVE EGGERS I lost someone very close to me and afterward I believed I could have saved him had I been a better ...
DAVE EGGERS I had forgotten that, and so many things. How could I put everything down on paper? It seemed imposs...
DAVE EGGERS My plans are a jumble for now, but I do know certain things that I will and will not do. [...] I wil...
DAVE EGGERS I had the sensation that I might always be running like this, that I would always have to run, and t...
DAVE EGGERS If I ever fall in love again, I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and...
DAVE EGGERS This boy thinks I am not of his species, that I am some other kind of creature, one that can be crus...
DAVE EGGERS I cannot count the times I have cursed our lack of urgency. If I ever love again, I will not wait to...
DAVE EGGERS Every part of my body felt electric. My chest ached and my head throbbed with the great terrible lim...
DAVE EGGERS Whatever I do, however I find a way to live, I will tell these stories. I have spoken to every perso...
DAVE EGGERS Humans are divided between those who can still look through the eyes of youth and those who cannot.
DAVE EGGERS But everyone disappears, no matter who loves them.
DAVE EGGERS I can remember exactly where I sat when my teacher first read Roald Dahl's 'James and the Gi...
DAVE EGGERS He was warm, partly because he had on many layers, and partly because boys whoa re part wolf and par...
DAVE EGGERS Thank you," he says.
"Thank who?"
"I don't know. You?"
"No, not me. Jesus." DAVE EGGERS There are many Saudi women doctors, and there are many wealthy and powerful and well-educated Saudi ...
DAVE EGGERS Because I grew up with this naive expectation of people doing right, I get shocked by every little v...
DAVE EGGERS You have what I can afford to give. You are a panhandler, begging for anything, and I am the man wal...
DAVE EGGERS Having lost people when they were young, you feel intimately acquainted with mortality, I guess. Tho...
DAVE EGGERS I've never had WiFi at home. I'm too easily distracted, and YouTube is too tempting.
DAVE EGGERS I really believe strongly that kids should be spared the runoff of their parents' lives and prob...
DAVE EGGERS So many of the things I invented I honestly did for fun, out of some perverse game of whether or not...
DAVE EGGERS I am myself a failed cartoonist, There are a million reasons to ruin things.
DAVE EGGERS Three-dimensional results are important to me. I did once spend some time just writing, and floating...
DAVE EGGERS You treat a kid with respect and as an adult you talk to them as if they're smart people. But yo...
DAVE EGGERS High school teachers who want to get reluctant readers turned around need to give the students some ...
DAVE EGGERS Existing, period – that is what drives men to irrational acts.
DAVE EGGERS –Don’t you think the vast majority of the chaos in the world is caused by a relatively small gro...
DAVE EGGERS You will die, and when you die, you will know a profound lack of it [dignity]. It's never dignified,...
DAVE EGGERS I like the dark part of the night, after midnight and before four-thirty, when it's hollow, when cei...
DAVE EGGERS I wondered quickly if I'd give my life so that a dragon could live. If someone offered me that deal,...
DAVE EGGERS The idea we came up with, well before we left, was something we coined Performance Literature. Excus...
DAVE EGGERS But the grind has begun. The windows don’t open, and even the availability of near-constant jokes ...
DAVE EGGERS But criticism, for the most part, comes from the opposite place that book-enjoying should come from....
DAVE EGGERS I think almost every writer in the world would hope that books would be always talked about with res...
DAVE EGGERS Every time I get through the work on a book of nonfiction, I say I'll never do it again; it take...
DAVE EGGERS I grew up north of Chicago, not far from where the Schwinn bicycle plant used to be, and was conscio...
DAVE EGGERS I went to Saudi Arabia in 2010, and spent most of my time in Jeddah and the King Abdullah Economic C...
DAVE EGGERS To me any given story has its appropriate form. There might be some story I get involved with that...
DAVE EGGERS Some of these kids just don't plain know how good they are: how smart and how much they have to ...
DAVE EGGERS People are strange, but more than that, they're good. They're good first, then strange.
DAVE EGGERS But Saudi Arabia is surprising in a lot of ways. Like any place, or any people, it relentlessly defi...
DAVE EGGERS I met a lot of great people in Saudi Arabia and I'd like to see them again. And I'd love to ...
DAVE EGGERS I mean, all this stuff you're involved in, it's all gossip. It's people talking about each other beh...
DAVE EGGERS One might think that a boy who was out in the snow for so long would get cold, but Max was not. He w...
DAVE EGGERS The country he had left thirty years ago had been a realistic place. There were political realities ...
DAVE EGGERS How do you know this?
Because I'm always watching people. When I watch people I too look...
DAVE EGGERS SECRETS ARE LIES
SHARING IS CARING
PRIVACY IS THEFT
DAVE EGGERS If somebody here isn't tolerant and accepting, we haven't met them yet.
DAVID EGGERS When we moved out of Manhattan - where nobody speaks to anyone else even though they all live close ...
DAVID EGGERS I do still get shocked every once in a while when I catch my reflection when I'm walking past a ...
DAVE MATTHEWS Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people 'the cops.' But...
DAVE ATTELL Everyone has a breaking point, turning point, stress point, the game is permeated with it. The fans ...
DAVE WINFIELD Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
DAVE BARRY We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain about it, we have to admi...
DAVE BARRY Instead of sailing off into the sunset, he hopes to sail into the next century.
DAVE ANDERSON For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
DAVE BARRY What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another pe...
DAVE BARRY Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
DAVE BARRY Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is ...
DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ...
DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to a...
DAVE BARRY The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
DAVE BARRY It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire.
DAVE BARRY I never excelled at one sport or had a very strong passion for anything other than wrestling and bod...
DAVE BAUTISTA A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are t...
DAVE ATTELL As an individual, I think you have to find your own path. I like the simplicity and purity of Hindui...
DAVE DAVIES I had a few brushes with death, where I nearly chose to go. The final one in 1996 did it for me. I s...
DAVE GAHAN The important thing to remember is that bugs don't actually talk.
DAVE FOLEY When people get disillusioned and get insecure and content about the future, they tend to brood abou...
DAVE DAVIES Jazz isn't dead yet. It's the underpinning of everything in this country. Whether it's a...
DAVE BRUBECK That's country music for you - bourbon and the Bible.
DAVE HAYWOOD The Left likes to think of itself as the bulwark of progressive liberal individualism, and yet it se...
DAVE BRAT Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
DAVE BARRY A standard sitcom... is a very standard idea, like these people falling in love and living with each...
DAVE FINKEL Standing out as a writer today requires more than a bright idea and limpid prose. Authors need to be...
DAVE MORRIS Empire Square production finishes in about a month's time, so at the moment, right now, I'm ...
DAVE ROWNTREE It is criminal to put our servicemen and women in harm's way and to put the lives of so many civ...
DAVE MATTHEWS We don't have enough people going into those fields and there is a high burnout rate in some hea...
DAVE OBEY Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker room is th...
DAVE BARRY If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.
DAVE BARRY The question is, why are politicians so eager to be president? What is it about the job that makes i...
DAVE BARRY I go to see some big shows of other bands, and I feel like I'm so bombarded and over-stimulated ...
DAVE GAHAN I'm tired of high policy talks. I want to focus on nuts and bolts.
DAVE FREUDENTHAL The thing that will never go away is that connection you make with a band or a song where you're...
DAVE GROHL I played a homosexual bodyguard in 'The Last Detective,' and that was quite a pleasure to do...
DAVE LEGENO It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso...
DAVE BARRY The baby boomer surge is forcing society to face decisions about costs - and particularly what is va...
DAVE DEBRONKART Granted, a long book can be as daunting as a hard one. I nearly reached for 'Game of Thrones'...
DAVE MORRIS Joy comes from places you least expect it. It's usually the simple things, like watching my son ...
DAVE GAHAN If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to...
DAVE BARRY The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or...
DAVE BARRY The waves of love roll throughout the Universe, and overflow in our hearts..
Everything is ONE!
DAVE ZEBIAN I like the relaxed way in which the Japanese approach religion. I think of myself as basically a mor...
DAVE BARRY I'm so alive.
As I stand facing the beauty of the never-ending Pacific Ocean, a late afte...
DAVE PELZER 'Breaking Bad' and 'The Shield' were planned right from the start so that their narr...
DAVE MORRIS I found there's a fairly blatant racism in America that's already there, and I don't thi...
DAVE MATTHEWS I want to make hand-held music, undiminished by the need to make everybody in the world listen at on...
DAVE SITEK We all have to die some day, if we live long enough.
DAVE FARBER We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless...
DAVE BARRY The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitutio...
DAVE BARRY There just isn’t enough cock in this world to be caught suckin’ and be called anything but a slu...
DAVE MATTHES ...you're either gonna spend your life fucking pussy, or taking it to church.
DAVE MATTHES I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.
DAVE BARRY Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on.
DAVE BARRY It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know ...
DAVE BARRY You had me at "We'll make it look like an accident."
DAVE BARRY Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
DAVE BARRY I'd take a nerf bullet for you.
DAVE BARRY What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
DAVE BARRY The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter ...
DAVE BARRY It was not that Adam ate the apple for the apple's sake, but because it was forbidden. It would have...
DAVE BARRY I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to r...
DAVE BARRY Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
DAVE BARRY I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.
DAVE BARRY In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is ba...
DAVE BARRY Wake up naked drinking coffee
Making plans to change the world
While the world is changing...
DAVE MATTHEWS Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see wi...
DAVE BARRY