I admit I was drinking a Guinness . . . but I did not swallow.


Kinky Friedman

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I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
I vote Libertarian, straight ticket. But otherwise, Kinky Friedman, because he's not a politician, e...
JOHN SHEFFIELD
I've been watching what I eat. When I was putting on all the weight, I was drinking Guinness and...
ROBBIE WILLIAMS
Admit what we did wrong: I started drinking too many Cokes, eating later.
GARY COXE
We were looking for new and interesting ways to fund this campaign, so we came out with a Kinky Frie...
BILL HILLSMAN
I am glad it is someone like you, Bryan, ... I know I will get a fair shake. I have got to admit I w...
JOSEPH GRAY
Let me ask you something first. Do you want a regular vanilla relationship with no kinky fuckery at ...
E.L. JAMES
I don't think that Kinky is a rich man, but he does OK.
DEAN BARKLEY
Woman is always fickle - foolish is he who trusts her.
FRANCIS I
Long ailments wear out pain, and long hopes, joy.
STANISLAUS I
Youth is the first victim of war; the first fruit of peace. It takes 20 years or more of peace to ma...
BAUDOUIN I
Courage is like love; it must have hope for nourishment.
NAPOLEON I
When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty.
GREGORY I
One should act in consonance with the way of heaven and earth, which is enduring and eternal. The su...
I CHING
The quiet and solitary man apprehends the inscrutable. He seeks nothing, holds to the mean, and rema...
I CHING
Great effort is required to arrest decay and restore vigor. One must exercise proper deliberation, p...
I CHING
Before a thunderstorm there is a build-up of tension which is only relieved by the explosive force o...
I CHING
Creativity comes from awakening and directing men's higher natures, which originate in the primal de...
I CHING
The way of the creative works through change and transformation, so that each thing receives its tru...
I CHING
Change is certain. Peace is followed by disturbances; departure of evil men by their return. Such re...
I CHING
The responses of human beings vary greatly under dangerous circumstances. The strong man advances bo...
I CHING
A person in danger should not try to escape at one stroke. He should first calmly hold his own, then...
I CHING
He who possesses the source of enthusiasm will achieve great things. Doubt not. You will gather frie...
I CHING
Although I may not be a lioness, I am a lion's cub, and inherit many of his qualities; and as long a...
ELIZABETH I
Fiat justitia et pereat mundus.
Let justice be done, though the world perish.
FERDINAND I
Though God hath raised me high, yet this I count the glory of my crown: that I have reigned with you...
ELIZABETH I
I am your anointed Queen. I will never be by violence constrained to do anything. I thank God I am e...
ELIZABETH I
Never make a defense or apology before you are accused.
CHARLES I
It takes twenty years or more of peace to make a man; it takes only twenty seconds of war to destroy...
BAUDOUIN I
Must! Is must a word to be addressed to princes? Little man, little man! thy father, if he had been ...
ELIZABETH I
Everything proceeds as if of its own accord, and this can all too easily tempt us to relax and let t...
I CHING
In a few years there will be only five kings in the world -- the King of England and the four kings ...
FAROUK I
Never make a defence or apology before you be accused.
CHARLES I
The daughter of debate That still discord doth sow.
ELIZABETH I
'Twas God the word that spake it, He took the bread and brake it, And what the word did make i...
ELIZABETH I
If I follow the inclination of my nature, it is this: beggar-woman and single, far rather than queen...
ELIZABETH I
When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty
GREGORY I
The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delig...
I. KRISHNAMURTI
People are not an interruption of our business. People are our business.
A man's worst difficulties begin when he is able to do as he likes.
It is hard to look up to a leader who keeps his ear to the ground.
The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
The more intelligent a man is, the more originality he discovers in men. Ordinary people see no diff...
The intelligence is proved not by ease of learning, but by understanding what we learn.
Communication is something so simple and difficult that we can never put it in simple words.
Like threads of silver seen through crystal beads
Let love through good deeds show.
How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.
Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.
ELIZABETH I
In everyone's heart stirs a great homesickness.
That is the supreme value of history. The study of it is the best guarantee against repeating it.
It is a natural virtue incident to our sex to be pitiful of those that are afflicted.
ELIZABETH I
A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing.
ELIZABETH I
There is one thing higher than Royalty: and that is religion, which causes us to leave the world, an...
ELIZABETH I
If we still advise we shall never do.
ELIZABETH I
Those who appear the most sanctified are the worst.
ELIZABETH I
Though I am not imperial, and though Elizabeth may not deserve it, the Queen of England will easily ...
ELIZABETH I
The word must is not to be used to princes.
ELIZABETH I
The end crowneth the work.
ELIZABETH I
A fool too late bewares when all the peril is past.
ELIZABETH I
Brass shines as fair to the ignorant as gold to the goldsmiths.
ELIZABETH I
One man with a head on his shoulders is worth a dozen without.
ELIZABETH I
God has given such brave soldiers to this Crown that, if they do not frighten our neighbours, at lea...
ELIZABETH I
God forgive you, but I never can.
ELIZABETH I
I would rather go to any extreme than suffer anything that is unworthy of my reputation, or of that ...
ELIZABETH I
The past cannot be cured.
ELIZABETH I
The stone often recoils on the head of the thrower.
ELIZABETH I
I have the heart of a man, not a woman, and I am not afraid of anything.
ELIZABETH I
I do not so much rejoice that God hath made me to be a Queen, as to be a Queen over so thankful a pe...
ELIZABETH I
To be a king and wear a crown is a thing more glorious to them that see it than it is pleasant to th...
ELIZABETH I
I do not want a husband who honours me as a queen, if he does not love me as a woman.
ELIZABETH I
I know I have the body of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and o...
ELIZABETH I
Do not tell secrets to those whose faith and silence you have not already tested.
ELIZABETH I
All my possessions for a moment of time.
ELIZABETH I
You should learn how say things with your eyes that others waste time putting into words.
EYDEN I.
As for my own part I care not for death, for all men are mortal; and though I be a woman yet I have ...
ELIZABETH I
I would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married.
ELIZABETH I
Monarchs ought to put to death the authors and instigators of war, as their sworn enemies and as dan...
ELIZABETH I
Have the courage to face a difficulty lest it kick you harder than you bargain for.
STANISLAUS I
Fear not, we are of the nature of the lion, and cannot descend to the destruction of mice and such s...
ELIZABETH I
Though the sex to which I belong is considered weak you will nevertheless find me a rock that bends ...
ELIZABETH I
(Response to King Erik XIV of Sweden's proposal of marriage:)

"[W]hile we perceive ... th...
ELIZABETH I
[F]rom my years of understanding ... I happily chose this kind of life in which I yet live [i.e., un...
ELIZABETH I
[I]n the end this shall be for me sufficient, that a marble stone shall declare that a Queen, having...
ELIZABETH I
To be vain of one's rank or place, is to show that one is below it.
STANISLAS I
Our wisdom comes usually from our experience, and our experience comes largely from our experience.
One thing about the school of experience is that it will repeat the lesson if you flunk the first ti...
To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of...
Some families can trace their ancestors back three hundred years, but can't tell you where their chi...
A recent survey was said to prove that the people we Americans most admire are our politicians and d...
If a man defrauds you one time, he is a rascal; if he does it twice, you are a fool.
Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
Courage is always greatest when blended with meekness; intellectual ability is most admired when it ...
Freedom also includes the right to mismanage your own affairs.
Let your friends be the friends of your deliberate choice.
The man who has strong opinions and always says what he thinks is courageous - and friendless.
Friendship is love with understanding.
So few people think. When we find one who really does, we call him a genius

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I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.
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I'd felt that a man without a woman was like a neck without a pain
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I've always thought that she was pretty spunky. I like her spirit.
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The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount.
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When I got to Broadway, I conducted five Broadway shows.
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They would need that to compare to the sample to make sure it doesn't belong to the victim.
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[That means even if you can afford one of these gems, you might have to wait.] A one carat pink can ...
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Civilized man longs for the illusion of barbarism. Either his culture fulfills this need by adopting...
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Just having the industrial zones is a step forward. We would've liked to see more areas included. De...
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It was the perfect choice because all the parts are written for kids and teens.
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Unlike other programs, our cast is always made up of the students involved in the show. We don?t bri...
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I want to make sure the children have as professional an experience as possible. Preparing them for ...
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The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by sma...
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Concentrated power is not rendered harmless by the good intentions of those who create it.
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We share need, not-human. Yours is straightforward.” … “Mine is less so, but you will serve it...
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Only in summer-phase is it carnivorous.”

If there was an award for understatement, I th...
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Life is the messy bits.
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Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.
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Never try to walk across a river just because it has an average depth of four feet.
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The Dell Theory of Conflict Prevention argues that no two countries that are both part of the same g...
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When government - in pursuit of good intentions - tries to rearrange the economy, legislate morality...
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Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself.
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Inflation is taxation without legislation.
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I don't care what people say about how I look or even their opinion on my relationship. But the mome...
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We're counting on him to be a productive member of our bullpen.
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We're getting really close to obtaining the support we need.
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He understands what it takes to make a team successful.
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We were seeing situations when, even after they reported hazardous conditions and violations were is...
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We are led by lawyers who do not understand either technology or balance sheets.
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
You take one bomber and deploy him in Baghdad, and another is manufactured in Riyadh the next day. I...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
The most important single central fact about a free market is that no exchange takes place unless bo...
MILTON FRIEDMAN
No matter where I go - London, Beirut, Jerusalem, Washington, Beijing, or Bangalore - I'm always...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN
A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's friend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are just...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind and ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
The most important thing about a TV set is to get it back against something and not out in the middl...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind and ...
BRUCE FRIEDMAN
If it's a cliche to say that intellectual curiosity keeps your mind sharp, your senses alert, an...
ADENA FRIEDMAN
I didn't see your backbone. I felt like you were sleeping though the lyrical dance.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
It allows your car to run on straight vegetable oil just the same way you would on diesel, with very...
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
I knew once one person had one, their friend would get one, and their neighbor would get one and it ...
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
To be honest, I never wanted to live in L.A.. I like this area, but L.A.'s a pit, sorry. I'm from Sa...
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
They were getting progressively violent.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
Your fox trot is the smoothest I've seen yet.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
It's not a hippie experiment anymore, ... It actually works and it works really well.
BRIAN FRIEDMAN
The more Israel sinks into the West Bank, the more it is delegitimized and isolated, the more the wo...
THOMAS FRIEDMAN