He was complaining about his leg pain being so bad, which you never know somebody's pain tolerance. You thought he had a busted up knee, but we didn't know it was so bad.

I thought rather than sit there and keep complaining, I'd do something about it.

That's huge for patients who may have used pain medications for a long time and have a tolerance. It can take the anxiety away; some are fearful of waking up to incredible pain.

In terms of pain tolerance, he's first on this team in my book. If he's hurt and injured and he goes to a trainer, you know it's serious. Otherwise, you're not going to know he's hurt.

I always hated when my scars started to fade, because as long as I could still see them, I knew why I was hurting.

You can argue that it's a different world now than the one when Matthew Shepard was killed, but there is a subtle difference between tolerance and acceptance. It's the distance between moving into the cul-de-sac and having your next door neighbor trust you to keep an eye on her preschool daughter for a few minutes while she runs out to the post office. It's the chasm between being invited to a colleague's wedding with your same-sex partner and being able to slow-dance without the other guests whispering.