Fly fishing for trout is like raising children. You never know what's going to happen next.

Fishing for browns requires stealth, patience, a lot of hiding behind bushes and limited wading. About the only time you'll see me hiding behind a bush is when I encounter a bear. I'd rather be on the water heading upstream. Doesn't seem to bother the rainbows and it's probably the reason I don't catch a lot of browns.

Fishing, with me, has always been an excuse to drink in the daytime

"Fly patterns are a lot like women. Some are plain. Some are flashy and some are in between. Look at your wife. She caught you, right? Tie a fly patterned after her, and you'll probably catch a lot of fish, but don't dare tell her if you're tying "plain".

I have no problems when I'm on the stream. My problems occur mostly at the office. Maybe I should move my office to the stream!

When I was a little kid, I fished real worms to catch fish and my nickname was Wormy. The worms also kept the girls away. Then when I discovered girls, I switched to flies thinking the girls would go fishing with me. That didn't work either! Not long after that, I changed my nickname from "WORMY" to "Fly Fishing Man" and started fishing flies. The girls fell all over me, but then I couldn't catch any fish." Moral of the story: "Young Man, Don't Give Up Your Worms Too Soon!