Everybody wants to please me. How long they allow me to stay here is another problem. ... But in case you're wondering, I'm having a swell time -- the best time of my life.

Television has a real problem. They have no page two.

When I got to the hospice I was under the impression it would be a two- or three-week stay. But here I still am, six weeks later, and I've gotten so well Medicare won't pay for me anymore.

A bad liver is to a Frenchman what a nervous breakdown is to an American. Everyone has had one and everyone wants to talk about it.

Whether it is the best of times or the worst of times, it is the only time we've got.

Whether it is the best of times or the worst of times, it is the only time we have.