Every time I sat in a chemistry lesson, I thought, 'What am I doing this for? I don't ever want to be in a job that involves a Bunsen burner.'

Well, every time I get ready to do a job I want to lose weight.

Every time I fumble or drop a ball I am embarrassed.

The end of the animal trade would leave more time to trap or beat to death pop star wannabes.

My comedy is different every time I do it. I don't know what the hell I'm doing.

If I went to a psychiatrist, it would be a long session. I've always thought that I do have a number of issues that probably need dealing with, because I am quite odd in some ways.