FastSaying

Every gathering has its moment. As an adult, I distract myself by trying to identify it, dreading the inevitable downswing that is sure to follow. The guests will repeat themselves one too many times, or you'll run out of dope or liquor and realize that it was all you ever had in common.


David Sedaris

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That’s what you say. That’s
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/ˈdignitē/ noun

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DAVID SEDARIS Like anyone nostalgic for a time he didn't live through, I chose to weed out the little inconvenienc...
DAVID SEDARIS Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later; he may be with his ...
AMY SEDARIS Sometimes losing a pet is more painful than losing a human because in the case of the pet, you were ...
AMY SEDARIS I always liked my teachers, and I was in a lot of after-school projects. I was a Girl Scout until my...
AMY SEDARIS My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper.
AMY SEDARIS I never really take shortcuts. I was always one of those people who, instead of cutting across someo...
AMY SEDARIS You think in a different way when you don't have any money. The joy of poverty is that you use y...
AMY SEDARIS I'm very domestic; I love cleaning. I love cooking. I like waiting on people. I just like to mak...
AMY SEDARIS I'm not a good storyteller. I always think I'm going to get interrupted, or something's ...
AMY SEDARIS People who shop in health food stores never look healthy.
AMY SEDARIS I wouldn't call myself a shut-in. I have the ability to leave my home; I just choose not to. But...
AMY SEDARIS I think it's still kind of weird to memorize a line, because you're supposed to 'be'...
AMY SEDARIS More men than women like 'Strangers With Candy'. Pretty girls don't like the show. They ...
AMY SEDARIS I like crafts that are made out of necessity because they're a little naive - you made it becaus...
AMY SEDARIS I'm gonna do the whole bedroom in camel color - it's an old lady color.
AMY SEDARIS If I put my mind to something, it happens. I do know that's not necessarily psychic. But I alway...
AMY SEDARIS You know when you watch old movies, it's always the small parts you remember, the character acto...
AMY SEDARIS Sometimes, to keep things exciting, I decorate my house as if I owned a child. I'll toss a tiny ...
AMY SEDARIS But I always like to play ugly people who think they're pretty.
AMY SEDARIS My father and I have a very good relationship. We always got along. But I always scold him.
AMY SEDARIS When people tell me they are going to go scrapbooking, I say, 'Why don't you make it yoursel...
AMY SEDARIS Books are challenging and inspirational to me.
AMY SEDARIS I love costumes. My dream growing up was always to have my own costume and prop shop.
AMY SEDARIS I love theatrical props: a cup filled with solid fake tea, say, or a collection of fake food, includ...
AMY SEDARIS I like crafts that come out of poverty or necessity. There used to be hobby shops where you'd ge...
AMY SEDARIS I like to decide the night before Thanksgiving that I'm gonna do it, and I'll see what riff ...
AMY SEDARIS We're all used to seeing pretty people. I want to see real people.
AMY SEDARIS My favorite things often have a story behind them and are usually handmade or discovered at a flea m...
AMY SEDARIS I have always wanted a bunny and I'll always have a rabbit the rest of my life.
AMY SEDARIS My characters always like themselves.
AMY SEDARIS It's all about process to me - as long as it's fun to me, I don't care about the final product.
AMY SEDARIS It was more of their quirky show. It was more like a cult show. The ratings weren't really that high...
AMY SEDARIS I'm satisfied just thinking of the idea.
AMY SEDARIS I choose to do unattractive people, because then I can pretend they think they're attractive.
AMY SEDARIS I'm not a first-place person.
AMY SEDARIS You know when you watch old movies, it's always the small parts you remember, the character actors w...
AMY SEDARIS I always got along with all types of people - popular people as well as drug addicts.
AMY SEDARIS It's driving me crazy! It's awful. I saw four last night during the Academy Awards. Four little baby...
AMY SEDARIS I choose to do unattractive people, because then I can pretend they think they're attractive.
AMY SEDARIS