Don't play me,play lotto,you have a better chance of winning.

Life is full of infinite absurdities, which, strangely enough, do not even need to appear plausible, since they are true

I know there are in's and out's, I just don't know what the in's and out's are.

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

You can't save your ass and your face at the same time

Every time I put my shoes on, I'm doing this world a service.